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Dad Shoots Daughter's Laptop: Good Parenting?
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Olivia_WebMD_Staff posted:
It's been all over the news for the past several days: A dad posted a video on Facebook of him shooting his daughter's laptop in order to teach her a lesson in respect.

In your opinion was this a good way for a parent to make a point?

Why or why not?
Reply
 
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brunosbud responded:
If he had used mercury-filled bullets, the laptop would have exploded upon impact. I wish he could have used those bullets, instead...
 
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shania09 replied to brunosbud's response:
I think the dad was very hurt by the words his daughter said. Him shooting the laptop, may have been a little over the top, but I think he was justified in doing so. I am also sure this form of punishment will be remembered by his daughter for a very long time to come. When she becomes a parent, and she catches her child doing something like this, a little light will go off in her head and she will realize just how hurt her daddy was when he read what she wrote.
Hopefully some day they can sit back while watching his grand kids play and laugh about this incident.
 
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Anon_5366 replied to Rod_Moser_PA_PhD's response:
I agree!
 
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emilysmiley responded:
I think that they need counseling and all.
The parent well is simply pissed about what his daughter did.
and the daughter is simply pissed that her parents are only sitting and done no chores..

I understand that the parents are the ones who bring her everything but why do this sort of family or relationship seems to be lacking love and care?

Well yeah, your daughter posted something to ease her thoughts but why post a video in youtube? and let everyone see how imature you're child has been.
In a way, it shows you too are being imature.
Like daddy like daughter huh?

Why not talk things through rather than let the world see what a bad relationship you had with your child.

Talking ease every problem. and it's YOUR child, means a part of yourself.
I don't think he is a responsible parent.
he should learn how to be rather.
and the child needs to learn how to respect (especially in words) her parents.

All they need is CLOSURE.

I vote for no one coz both of them are in wrong.
 
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Mercerswife responded:
With the way kids are now days, I absolutely agree. If children want privileges then they shouldn't disrespect their family and parents. Clearly grounding wasn't working, so getting rid of the laptop was a great alternative. I give props to this dad!
 
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AAgradillas responded:
I absolutely 100% agree with the dad. The ungrateful daughter needs to be taught some sort of lesson! If I had posted something like this on the internet for everything to read about my parents, after everything they have done for me (fed me, taken care of me, provided a clean, stable house for me to grow up in, etc) I would expect my dad to react in a similar way.
Kids these days have an "entitled" frame of mind and I think it's disgusting. So what if he wants her to "get a job" when she's 15, maybe then she'll actually have some respect for all of the money her parents have to spend to raise her, and to pay for things like her laptop, etc. I worked for my family's business since I can even remember. You know what it taught me? To appreciate everything I had. A few hours working won't ruin a 15 year olds life, but it might teach her a lesson or two about responsibility.
If the dad wants to shoot the laptop he paid for, then so be it. And NO, he shouldn't buy her another one since he ruined the first. I just cannot believe the personal drive and lack of motivation in the world today and it begins at such a young age, case and point, this video. No one deserves to have everything handed to them. 20 years ago a 15 year old would have never talked about her parents publicly like this or even questioned having to do her chores. 20 years ago I believe the personal drive was at a reputable level as well.
 
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Seattlemeg replied to AAgradillas's response:
An adult with children does not get to pitch a temper tantrum in this way and exercise his power over his child just because she said something he doesn't like. You're seriously going to use a *gun* because your kid whined about you on Facebook? That is not a normal or acceptable reaction.

Consistently and without fail, intimidation and abuse (whether physical or mental) produces a child who is anxious, fearful, and doesn't trust authority figures, whoever they are. This behavior from a parent is completely ineffective in dealing with a child's "inappropriate" behavior. It is never going to work. All it's going to do is humiliate her and cause her to close off to her parents even more.

The thing is that kids learn gratitude by seeing it modeled for them, just like anything else. Feeling frustrated with your kid's behavior... who hasn't felt that? The difference is that YOU ARE A GROWN PERSON and you get to decide how to react. Shooting your child's laptop is nothing more than pitching a fit. It's not useful, it's harmful to the relationship, and it certainly isn't to suddenly make her grateful to her parents. Instead of violence, how about saying, "I love you, I don't deserve to be treated badly by you publicly, I support you and am disappointed by your ungrateful behavior. You will have consequences for your actions, you start volunteering at a soup kitchen tomorrow and I just gave your laptop to a kid that will appreciate it more than you do."

You abuse computer privileges - you lose the computer. Okay - makes sense. Natural consequences. However, you abuse the computer - I'm going to blow holes in it with my big gun? Uh, hello? Only a show of force and violence. Dude, seriously? Grow up. You want a mature daughter? MODEL THE BEHAVIOR! The only thing she's learned is that people in positions of authority can respond with violence and there's nothing she can do about it. Sadly, she probably now wonders if he'll shoot HER the next time she speaks out. That isn't parenting.
 
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jenna291 replied to jpinmiss's response:
What if one of those bullets had bounced off the lap top and hit her? Guns are never an answer.
I agree with another poster - perhaps he should have taken the computer away and donated to someone who could appreciate it, but guns used in this way are not good. Today the computer, tomorrow an innocent person? He needs anger management councelling and his daughter also needs to speak with a professional.
 
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naggingwife74 replied to AAgradillas's response:
I don't understand why children should be expected to be grateful for parents that provide them a home, food, clothes and other neccesities. It is the RESPONSIBILITY of the parent to provide those things when they bring these kids into the world. You're not doing your kids a favor buy making sure they sleep on clean sheets at night, you are taking care of the life you chose to create.

I would expect my children to be thankful and appriciate when I bought him his Ipod, when I gave him gas money or money to go to the movies. Those are things that are earned, not given. But a clean, stable house to grow up in is not something a child should be thanking mom and dad for. I'm sorry but making a child (she is a child) get a job at 15 so she can appriciate how much it costs to raise her is a selfish thing to do. If a parent needs their kids to praise them for taking care of them and paying to raise them then they should think twice before having kids.

Paying money to raise and care for your kids is a parents' job, not something you should be patted on the back for.

I agree, the girl deserved what she got. She was disrespectful and ungrateful but I don't understand why some people think kids should appriciate the things that parents are responsible to provide once they have kids.
 
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DoOvers replied to Rod_Moser_PA_PhD's response:
After you give someone something it is no longer yours Dr. Moser. If someone gave you a bottle of wine and then came back a week later and asked for it back would he be entitled to it? This is his home, so to a lawful extent he can set guidelines, discipline et cetera. I find it somewhat disturbing that you think it is o.k. contextually speaking given what is presently taking place in the world today. All you have to do is jump off of main stream news and you will find many videos similar to this one with a strong point and the same , " I'm done putting up with this" attitude. Scary coming from a doctor....Locke was right.
 
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brunosbud responded:
Have you ever heard the saying, "Discipline begins at home."...

and, let us not forget the saying, "Respect begins at home."

and, what about, "Appreciation begins at home."

How about "Good manners begin at home."



Well, I've got a new one...

"Spoiled, self centered, little snots begin at home."

Gee, I guess a lot "things" begin at home...


Its a pity a lot of parents are clueless as to what that implies.
 
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Tomato05 responded:
Very expensive way of making a point.
 
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meltonmr responded:
think she definetly needed to be punished for her disrespect but shooting something that cost money/ hello money doesnt grow on trees, sell the dang thing take it away make her buy it back. i understand his rage if my son was that disrespectful id be p.o too. but i hope that i raise my son in a way that by the time he is 15 if hes mad at me he will tell me about it. hell i think this guy just pushed his kid away to the point she felt like she couldnt talk to him. if she could talk to him he could have told her that its her responsibility to clean her room and do chores. ugh ii hate the fuzzy stuff
 
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waskasmomma replied to meltonmr's response:
We all know what he did!!!! Did it do any good? What was her response? His response? Let's do an update on this story. Inquiring minds want to know.....was it worth it?
 
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Jimmybuck responded:
I was so enthused about this father's reaction that I just shot my desktop computer 30 times!!

Jimmybuck


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