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Are you nice?
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Olivia_WebMD_Staff posted:
A new study suggests that being nice (kindness and generosity) comes partly from our genes . But, it doesn't tell the whole story. Check out the article to find out what other factors go into the stew that makes up your personality.

Are you nice? Too nice? Nice but with some naughty tossed in?

Which one of your parents do you think most of your "nice" genes came from?

Do you know someone who is definitely short on the "nice gene? (No names please, but stories are welcome.)

(Tell the truth, now! We promise not to tell.)
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jenlewi responded:
I'm usually quite nice, but there are times I'm far from it. I have my pet peeves, and one of them is rude cell phone users. I also have what we laughingly refer to as "driver's tourette's". It's not uncommon for me to be yelling "Hang up and drive, moron!" when I'm in traffic.

Several years ago, I was grocery shopping when I saw a woman yapping on her cell phone run her cart into an old lady, actually injuring her. She didn't even pause in her conversation, so I snatched her phone, hung it up and told her "You owe this woman an apology, you idiot!" She was screeching at me about hanging up her call and insisting I give her phone back. The store manager came on the run to find out the cause of the disturbance, and I told him exactly what had happened. The back of the older woman's ankle was bleeding, and she confirmed what I said, so the manager took the idiot's phone from me, handed it to her and told her "Leave and never come back." He then took the older lady to the office to take care of her injuries.

I open doors for people, smile and say hello to strangers, the usual nice person routine, but if you want to see me go from nice to nasty in a heartbeat, cut in front of me in line at the gas station while yapping on your phone to throw your money at the clerk or do something else obnoxious while on your phone.

I got most of my nice genes from my father, but I'm not sure where the confrontational gene came from. Neither of my parents would ever snatch a phone away from a stranger to yell at them about their appalling lack of manners, although they will grumble about such people.
 
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butterflygarden replied to jenlewi's response:
Okay, if jenlewi can fess up, so can I.

I do believe I am nice most of the time. But, I have become less tolerant of stupidity as I have gotten older.

I am also guilty of losing my temper with other drivers. Cell phones are a pet peeve, as are drivers who seem to believe they are somehow entitled to cut in front of everyone or come from another direction and take a parking place I have been sitting patiently waiting for someone else to vacate. GRRRRR

Aside from that, I am a rather empathetic person. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt in most instances. I like to help others out when I have time to lend a hand. It makes me feel really good inside to know I am making a difference somewhere.

My nice genes definitely come from my mother, but I didn't inherit nearly as many as she has. She is a truly tolerant and kind person.

Butterfly
 
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fenton04 responded:
I am from a Italian and Irish stock. Do the math
 
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jenlewi replied to butterflygarden's response:
"Ignorance can be cured. Stupidity is forever." I'm not sure who said that, but it's spot-on. Sounds like we're both basically nice people with a few hot buttons. Not sure how you feel about it, but I'm not the least bit sorry when I'm hateful to rude people. I justify it to myself with "Even Mother Theresa would want to slap this twit."

I make a special point of helping elderly neighbors. I think that comes from my childhood, when the old ladies in the neighborhood used to bake treats for us for when we shovelled their snow or raked their leaves. Yes, it was a little mercenary to shovel the longest drive on the block for the hot chocolate and cookies, but those were really good cookies and the only REAL hot chocolate with REAL whipped cream I ever tasted in my life! I like to think that helped to make it a habit for me to help elderly neighbors. Now I'm usually the one doing the baking for them, but it's nothing like the treats I got as a kid!
 
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brunosbud responded:
You mean all the time?
 
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fcl responded:
I don't know about being nice but I firmly believe that politeness and courtesy accompanied by a smile make the world a more pleasant place to live and I do my best to teach that to my daughters. When you stop to let someone cross at a pedestrian crossing and they look at you and you smile and they smile back ... well that makes two of you that have had a "nice" moment in your day
 
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Olivia_WebMD_Staff replied to brunosbud's response:
LOL brunosbud!

No, not all the time...just in general.

And have you ever known anyone you consider "too" nice? Did you trust him/her?

I have to say I am wary of people who seem too nice. Maybe I am just jaded.

Olivia
 
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brunosbud replied to Olivia_WebMD_Staff's response:
Oh!...Just in general...In that case, "No".



This topic reminds me of a favorite line from comic Stephen Wright...

"I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, "Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours." He said, "Not in a row."

&, two more...

"My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."


"Everyone has a photographic memory. Most just don't have film."

Have a good day, Olivia...
 
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PSJ1970 responded:
I'd say I'm getting a little more vocal as I get older. I'm generally nice, I hold doors for people, I like to make people laugh or even smile. But sometimes, people just "p" me off. I was walking out of walmart the other day, in the middle of the coss walk that says "YIELD" and some dumb woman nearly ran over me...she was laid back in her seat, leaning to the side, with music blaring and evidently didn't want to be bothered to put her foot on the brake. I called her a "b", flipped her off and told my husband I wanted to hit her with our tow hitch. lol.
 
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Kate_Te responded:
I am nice to others & horrible to myself!!!
 
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PSJ1970 replied to Kate_Te's response:
That's what my best friend says about me...I have family problems and I blame myself for everything that goes wrong (because they do) so I beat myself up daily.
 
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mandyelizabeth87 replied to fenton04's response:
SAME!
 
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mandyelizabeth87 responded:
I'm Italian and Irish, I can be nice when I want to be without a second thought but I have an intolerance of most peoples lack of respect for one another or themselves. It seems to me that even women my age, in the early twenties, should conduct themselves with more respect instead of acting as if they are stuck in the 9th grade with raging hormones. Some people just never grow up or have the desire to better themselves or their situations and are too likely to point the blame towards an external souce instead of pointing the blame at themselves. In short, I guess my #1 pet peeve is disrespect. I suppose I get my "nice gene" from my father who was always willing to help someone out even if it was in some way inconvenient for him to do so, but if he was crossed in some way, there was no going back. It was suffer the dire conscequences. (That's my Italian side). I am definitely not nice all of the time, but when people respect themselves and respect others, it's hard not to be nice.
 
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brunosbud replied to Kate_Te's response:
Why don't you try being nice to yourself and horrible to others. This way you'll have "balance".

Go ahead, Kate_Te...you can start with Olivia or Fenton...


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