Grief & Loss Community: Support Group

Reply: Widow of a disabled Iraq War Veteran

I'm so sorry for your loss.... I know you have probably heard that a million times but honestly I...

Posted by ariannasmommy1125

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Widow of a disabled Iraq War Veteran I'm so sorry for your loss.... I know you have probably heard that a million times but honestly I...

Reply: Dealing with the grief of a loved one?

I have been lucky enough to not have experienced someone close to me passing away. Therefore, I want to gain...

Posted by alli_95

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needing support

basically just need to vent and am wanting to i guess just to feel supported, like im not alone....

Posted by amandabrown

basically just need to vent and am wanting to i guess just to feel supported, like im not alone. 05/26/2009 i lost my little 5 year old brother. my dad has always been a pill addict and im not sure if he was messed up on pills while this happened, but he was dropping both my little brothers off at their mothers house, and my father and his ex wife got into an arguement, well he ended up leaving, well trying to...he was driving one of those 1970s heavy vans and i guess backed over my little brother. he then stood up and said im ok, but his eyes rolled back and he dropped to the ground, which is the sign of a head injury. he was taken to a local (bad) hospital where he was resesitated (sp?) they cut open his chest and shocked his heart, from there he was flown to childrens hospital and thats where i arrived, 9 months pregnant with my first son. i was the first to arrive and saw everything, saw all the nurses scrambling to save this little boy, every one was panicking, i got pulled in a room with social servies and was then sent to wait in the waiting room until dylan (my brother) was stable enough to have family. he was in icu forever it seemed like, all my family was there, yelling at my father, him balling his eyes out, feeling guilty of course, we were rushed in after 2 or 3 hours of waiting because the doctor and nurses said he would ie soon. it was myself, father, and step mother in the room when he passed away not even 5 minutes of getting in the room. i said my goodbyes and was just in shock, i didnt really cry, just kind of felt numb, it was too much to take in. i hate to say it but i always played favorites with my brothers i was 20 at the time of his death and it was like i raised dylan since my step mom was an alcoholic, pill addict as well. now here i amalmost 4 years later, ive over come alcoholism for the most part, i do relapse sometimes but im young and working on it. i am now married and ive always known his death has affected me very negatively. i cry all the time now, its like the greiving process started as soon as i had my son 2 weeks after my brother died, i felt no attachment, was just sad, but now even years later like i said i cry all the time, i shut myself down, wont talk. i work a more than full time job with two children now and pay all my bills which are a lot to handle with how much my husband and i make. i honestly dont even know why im typing this, maybe its because the 4 years is coming up soon and im emotional. ive cut myself once or twice and no one knows but 2 friends and my husband my family wouldnt accept it. i cant get into counseling due to my work schedule i just feel like im trapped and all i want is to get over this death. i dont want to cry anymore. i want my brother back, the whole situation wasnt fair but life isnt fair....but i just keep wishing it was. i just want to hug him one more time, i want my family to not be this trashy addict family. i dont know if i should be angry with my father or just support him and not show my emotions bc he feels bad enough. so many emotions are going on. i just wish it could all be ok.View Thread

Posted by amandabrown

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:needing support basically just need to vent and am wanting to i guess just to feel supported, like im not alone....

Reply: My childs father passed away

I am in a very similar situation as you. My daughter's dad was killed in October 2012. She was 9 at the...

Posted by BrownEyes2103

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:My childs father passed away I am in a very similar situation as you. My daughter's dad was killed in October 2012. She was 9 at the...

Step Mother With Cancer

Hello everyone, I am new to this community and I am so glad that I found it. My step mother who is about 67...

Posted by bpcookie

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Step Mother With Cancer Hello everyone, I am new to this community and I am so glad that I found it. My step mother who is about 67...

Reply: Your own Funeral

Well Im only 30 myself but I have a few suggestions for my own as you called it going away party. I think...

Posted by AkariMoon

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Your own Funeral Well Im only 30 myself but I have a few suggestions for my own as you called it going away party. I think...

Reply: My Dad & my girls Daddy died 1 month apart

We had the very same in our family. First my grandmother in her eighties died in April of last year then by...

Posted by AkariMoon

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:My Dad & my girls Daddy died 1 month apart We had the very same in our family. First my grandmother in her eighties died in April of last year then by...

Reply: My daddy just died and I can't deal with it

I too lost my mother in July of 2012. She was of good health the only thing she had was high blood pressure....

Posted by AkariMoon

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:My daddy just died and I can't deal with it I too lost my mother in July of 2012. She was of good health the only thing she had was high blood pressure....

Reply: My Dad died 3 months ago and I can't deal

I know how you are feeling. My daddy died December 13, 2012. I keep myself busy with life too, but it does...

Posted by gatorfan30

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:My Dad died 3 months ago and I can't deal I know how you are feeling. My daddy died December 13, 2012. I keep myself busy with life too, but it does...

Reply: if i could just have one more conversation with my...

I lost my daughter to drugs. I am in recovery , It is very hard to except she is not here, and I will never...

Posted by babygirl4u2

8 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:if i could just have one more conversation with my mom..... I lost my daughter to drugs. I am in recovery , It is very hard to except she is not here, and I will never...

Reply: The Many Losses...

I thank you for the prayers. Its been a while since she did pass and I find it still hard on me to deal with....

Posted by AkariMoon

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:The Many Losses... I thank you for the prayers. Its been a while since she did pass and I find it still hard on me to deal with....

How to speak to grandson about how his mother pass...

I lost my daughter last year and am now taking care of one of her son's while his older brother is in a group...

Posted by max1959

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:How to speak to grandson about how his mother passed away? I lost my daughter last year and am now taking care of one of her son's while his older brother is in a group...

Reply: alone

Hello, COgirl64. My mom died 20 years ago this coming April. I was alone, and taking care of her alone. I even...

Posted by Bastet

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:alone Hello, COgirl64. My mom died 20 years ago this coming April. I was alone, and taking care of her alone. I even...

Reply: loss of my babygirl while with child

Did you lose your girl to a miscarriage or was your girl pregnant when she passed? Sometimes we do not have...

Posted by Illbethere

Take the Poll

how to deal with this loss?

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:loss of my babygirl while with child Did you lose your girl to a miscarriage or was your girl pregnant when she passed? Sometimes we do not have...

Reply: How to help a grieving sister

I have a friend that lost her husband in a car accident. I think the only thing we can do for others...

Posted by Illbethere

Take the Poll

Is it possible to help relieve some of the grief a friend is feeling?

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:How to help a grieving sister I have a friend that lost her husband in a car accident. I think the only thing we can do for others...

Lost my daughter due to a rare birth defect

A few years ago I lost a baby at seven weeks, reason unknown. I found out back in august we was expecting,...

Posted by megstermyers

A few years ago I lost a baby at seven weeks, reason unknown. I found out back in august we was expecting, I was scared out of my mind. I found out a week before christmas we was having a girl, but the same day we found out she had a birth defect called encephalocele. After talking to numerous specialist we found out that her's could not be fixed. When she was born she would never cry or move, she would basically be a vegetable. They also told me that due to the brain developing outside of the skull the fluid was attacking her brain and along with movement in the womb it was causing her pain. Due to complications and worries for my life the doctors enduced me and I gave birth naturally on 01/11/2013 to a beautiful baby girl we named Nevaeh Alynn, who was in almost everyway her fathers double. She only lived for an hour and seven mins.Her father, my future husband had to leave the hospital and travel 2 & 1/2 hours home the night before for work. He wasent there when she was born nor was he there when she passed. I wasent prepared for anything I have been through. Nobody ever told me that I would need to get insurance while my child was in the womb, nor did I know how to have a funeral let alone what was appropriate or not. These past few weeks seem like a blur and honestly a lifetime has seemed to pass since that moment. I miss my baby girl so much and wish things was different. I know rationally things couldnt have been different but I still wish there was. Im so sick of everyone telling me how sorry they are and telling me things will get better. I feel like a monster because im not lying in bed crying everyday. I do break down but I dont let anyone see me. In the past few weeks I have lost my daughter, my job, and I was kicked out of school because I lost my aid because I failed one class last semester due to my pregnancy. I feel so lost and have no clue what to do with my life. I honestly dont feel like I am the same person I was just less than a month ago. I feel like nothing will ever be the same. Will it?View Thread

Posted by megstermyers

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Lost my daughter due to a rare birth defect A few years ago I lost a baby at seven weeks, reason unknown. I found out back in august we was expecting,...

Reply: Loss of Significant Other

SR71blackbird, there is truly nothing you more you could have done. When a person has diabetes they must...

Posted by thiamarie1

SR71blackbird, there is truly nothing you more you could have done. When a person has diabetes they must take responsibility for taking care of themselves and no matter how much you try to encourage them to do so, it will only happen if they want to do it. Congestive Heart Failure is directly connected with uncontrolled diabetes. I tell you this because I just lost my husband of 23 years on Dec 13, 2012, to the same thing. He was diagnosed with diabetes 15 years ago and I constantly tried to make him eat right, excercise, take his medication, and monitor his sugar levels. About 5 years ago he started getting numbness in his feet but that still did not change him. Two years later he stepped on a nail that he did not feel and by the time he realized it, it had become grossly infected and they thought they would have to amputate his foot. Six months of aggressive treatment of antibiotics and it finally healed. That still did not change him. 2 years ago, he had his first CHF episode and was in the hospital for a week. Still no change. For the last 2 years his body was continually having problems with CHF then his kidneys started failing and he had to go on dialysis last year. At this point he was finally beginning to understand that he needed to make a change, but it turned out to be too little, too late. He died December 13, 2012. The one thing that I know is that I tried everything I could to get him to change his lifestyle, but like your boyfriend, he did not take it seriously enough to make the change to prevent himself from going into such a steep decline, not realizing they lacked the strength to climb out of it until it was too late. So don't beat yourself up, you did what you could. I loved my husband and I miss him terribly. The incredible since of loss is overwhelming at times but I know that I did what I could and he is in a better place now because he is no longer in pain. I pray that you will find comfort in my story and know that things will get better with time.View Thread

Posted by thiamarie1

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Loss of Significant Other SR71blackbird, there is truly nothing you more you could have done. When a person has diabetes they must...

Reply: Life I want it back............

sbpmp: I am writing you because I read your story.....I can relate to the "GAME" thing.....I had to look...

Posted by bonnieindiana

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Life I want it back............ sbpmp: I am writing you because I read your story.....I can relate to the "GAME" thing.....I had to look...

Reply: Lost my dad to Lung Cancer in Sept. '12

Oh, thanks for sharing, friend. My heart was breaking for you as I read your story. You sound like an...

Posted by gardensparrow

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Lost my dad to Lung Cancer in Sept. '12 Oh, thanks for sharing, friend. My heart was breaking for you as I read your story. You sound like an...

Reply: Grieving my fertility

whorescuedwho, Your story sounds almost exactly like mine. I came across this thread, now that all of the...

Posted by StephMu08

14 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Grieving my fertility whorescuedwho, Your story sounds almost exactly like mine. I came across this thread, now that all of the...

Reply: Loss of a Spouse

An_248369: Thank you for sharing your story and I know that it is difficult to write what you are feeling and...

Posted by TTYS5829

Take the Poll

Like to hear different comments on ways to move forward.

6 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Loss of a Spouse An_248369: Thank you for sharing your story and I know that it is difficult to write what you are feeling and...

STILL GRIEVING MY BABY'S DEATH AFTER TWO YEARS

My son was a premature baby. I had him when I was 23 weeks and he passed 7 hours later.. The pain was to...

Posted by Anon_122060

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:STILL GRIEVING MY BABY'S DEATH AFTER TWO YEARS My son was a premature baby. I had him when I was 23 weeks and he passed 7 hours later.. The pain was to...

Reply: Lost my son 8/09

Dear Lostmomofmorethanone, Don't try to handle everything at once. You are not going crazy! You are ...

Posted by Cacynia

Dear Lostmomofmorethanone,
Don't try to handle everything at once. You are not going crazy! You are grieving! You lost a big important part of you. I myself have not lost a son, so I won't pretend to know what you are feeling. What I will tell you, is that thinking of what it feels like to have lost my Mom (who was/is my Best Friend-my go to person), you're hurting BIG time. And right now it feels like you aren't strong enough to handle it.
Please don't feel like you aren't doing enough for your mom. She might not be able to tell you or doesn't know how to put it in words, but she is grateful for your love and company. What you are giving her by being there to help and support her, is far more than what any doctors can do. Talk with your mom share with her your favorite memories of your childhood, times that you and Scotty shared with her, etc. Tell her how much she means to you. This will be a comfort for both of you.
Continue to talk to Scotty, tell him how and what you're feeling. Tell Scotty your favorite memories of him. He is with you and talking will help. Won't cure, but will help.
Scotty sounds like he was a great person. Though, he may not have been an angel, He still could be counted on to be there when the chips were down. That is huge!
I don't know if your son's passing was recent, but it sounds as if it was, so that will make things harder to process. You have a lot going on, all at once. Try to take a few moments during the day, to have some me time. Even if it is only five minutes, use it to write down a memory, look at photos, feel the grief and let it out. Breathe deeply. You can do this, You are Scotty's Mom! Remember to take it one step at a time. (and those steps are baby steps) Feel free to write back, it won't fix everything, but it will help. I hope what I said can help you. ((((Hugs))))View Thread

Posted by Cacynia

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Lost my son 8/09 Dear Lostmomofmorethanone, Don't try to handle everything at once. You are not going crazy! You are ...

Reply: close to a breakdown

My sister passed away on 10/24.

Posted by wifeofnamvet

244 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:close to a breakdown My sister passed away on 10/24.

Reply: fathers suicide

Hello Dear, Your father must have been depressed also. He needed something and didn't know what he was looking...

Posted by Cooch01

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:fathers suicide Hello Dear, Your father must have been depressed also. He needed something and didn't know what he was looking...

loss of my babygirl while with child

Not sure how to do this. i am very familar with death. lost my dad at 16 in my arms, and lots of death....

Posted by lostinthepast

Not sure how to do this. i am very familar with death. lost my dad at 16 in my arms, and lots of death. But a year and half ago I lost the love of my life! my 23 year old daughter that was just a month pregant, i had to id her body. the pain is like 2 minutes ago. and the truth is in my heart of hearts there was foul play. see we lived together, we were joined at the hip but when i id her, there wasn't a hair out of place, a bloody bath towel and a messy motel room. i was just with her not 12 hrs before. but my girl used and i am stressing used to use heroin. she was so clean, all she ever wanted was a child. the m.e . and the police said it was death by heroin overdose by injestion. meaning it was placed in food or drink and the amount not controlled. most heroin addicts never injest. cuz they cannot control the amount. but i knew my girl, she would never of done that. when she used in the past it was with a needle, but she did it all the methodone clinic, counslers , therapy all of it. she was so happy her and i bought a place to raise the baby. this was just to say good bye to a bad boy in her life that was not suppose to be out of jail and was but the issue is this, i never have peace. and it is not just a moms intuition, cuz i brought someone with me and he even said there was foul play. my other daughter wont let me persue the issue, but my gut mind and heart wont let me move on. i see her every time i close my eyes i hear her saying momma thats the way she said it. she was so happy i died with her. anyone understand? not stupid here, i do see a physc. maybe talking will help me. thank you. i cry out to her all the time. i need her, she left me to fight the fight of life alone. and yes i do believe in God. I don't know how to move on, I dont' drink, once every 6 months, i dont do drugs, except what is perscribed which i was ive been on for 15 years for anxiety and i cannot take anti depressences, i have a sentivity, but ppl i lost 7 jobs this year i dont function. i fake it. lost in love with my lost child. kicker is i have another daughter, but i cannot be there for her she is so different, always has been. i try.View Thread

Posted by lostinthepast

Take the Poll

how to cope??i have thought about dying myself a million times, just scared that she wouldnt be there to catch me.

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:loss of my babygirl while with child Not sure how to do this. i am very familar with death. lost my dad at 16 in my arms, and lots of death....

how do I grieve without going crazy?

My Mom passed in March 2012 of pancreatic cancer. I was living about 300 miles away when she was diagnosed. She...

Posted by stormi

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:how do I grieve without going crazy? My Mom passed in March 2012 of pancreatic cancer. I was living about 300 miles away when she was diagnosed. She...

My son's father passed away.

My son's father passed away 5 months ago... we have a six year old son together. We were not together at the...

Posted by Jserrano

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:My son's father passed away. My son's father passed away 5 months ago... we have a six year old son together. We were not together at the...

lost my stepmom to ovarian cancer

It seems just like yesterday July 2011, my stepmom would call me from down in Georgia where she was living far...

Posted by kwr61

It seems just like yesterday July 2011, my stepmom would call
me from down in Georgia where she was living far away from us here
in Indiana not her real home state but where she had made her way
and her life with her 4 children, even though I wasn't hers she loved
me like I was, and for that I will always LOVE her like she was my MOM, this woman was what we like to call the salt of the earth, she was kind, caring, and full of compassion for everyone she would give of herself to the children of the people she worked with when their parents were laid off and couldn't afford to buy them presents for christmas her and her commitee of women would have bake sales carwashes yard sales whatever it took to get presents for the kids, now if it seems like this is a superwoman, then let me tell you what happened: like said it was july 2011 she would call me on Sundays and we would just talk for what seemed like 4ever these conversations were becoming a regular 4 me, then I hadn't got a call 4 a couple of weeks then one day my stepbrother called me he was down in Georgia, strange I thought it was then he told me that his mom my stepmom had been diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer (inoperable to be sure) seems she was going in 4 gall bladder surgery when it was found 08/11 I coudn't believe it not my stepmom this seemingly indestructable woman, this woman who could work 10 men under the table, not my stepmom, but sure as god would have it indeed it was, so with all the stength I could muster I went to see her in the hospital, I couldn't comprehend what my eyes were telling me, but there she was looking so pale so weak depleted already, not even having started this journey that would take such a beautiful spirit full of life, so quickly, in a matter of just 1 year, I got the call Aug,10 2012 that if I wanted to see her that i needed to get there ASAP, well she surprised everyone and hung in there for the rest of the week but unfortunately this Superwoman met her cryptonite and its name was cancer on Aug,17 2012 she passed, now here we are trying to pick up the pieces and move forward, not an easy task I know but here I am trying to muster up all the strength I can just to cope, my Dad ran off to Tennessee to his vacation place to collect himself, and, for that I'm not angry, he has to deal with it in his own way I just miss those calls from Georgia on Sunday'sView Thread

Posted by kwr61

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:lost my stepmom to ovarian cancer It seems just like yesterday July 2011, my stepmom would call me from down in Georgia where she was living far...

Reply: Loss of my nephew...I really need help

I had to reply to your post because your tragedy is eerily similar to my own. First off, how are things for...

Posted by AuntKat1234

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Loss of my nephew...I really need help I had to reply to your post because your tragedy is eerily similar to my own. First off, how are things for...