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ADD / ADHD Community

Reply: ADHD/Anger outburst

I went thru the same thing with my son, and he was never on medication; seems just to...

Posted by ladysailor44

I went thru the same thing with my son, and he was never on medication; seems just to be behavior issues that come with the territory...maybe because of all the frustration they experience. Anyway, one thing that helped significantly (helped, didn't solve...don't think there is a panacea) was old fashioned positive reinforcement. I simply ignored his unwanted behavior as much as possible, and actively looked for moments to catch him doing something--anything--even remotely like desired behavior; and gave him an immediate small reward. ADHD kids seem to especially like collecting and hoarding stuff; so for a while He-Man cards worked, and then as he got older, poker chips that he could trade in for added privileges. I'd try to find an average of one excuse a day to hand him a reward and a hug; some days he got two or three, some none. Found it very helpful in motivating him to improve his behavior. Found punishment worse than useless...it just increased his defiance, outbursts and anger. So I really had to pick and choose my battles. NO punishment for not doing homework for example, just intermittent rewards when he did (supposedly you shouldn't reward positive behavior EVERY time it occurs, they'll try harder and longer if you gradually make it more and more intermittent). Punishment only applied if he did something that might cause himself or others physical harm. Otherwise, just ignore--as much as you can anyway.
Another thing that proved worse than useless--withdrawing privileges. There wasn't anything that he wasn't willing to give up, unfortunately. Pretty soon he had no privileges left at all, nothing to look forward to, and was totally resentful. Better to let him keep a baseline set of privileges regardless of behavior; and instead of taking ones away as punishment for bad behavior, grant additional ones for good behavior.
Hardest thing I had getting him to do though, was to actually spend any of his rewards! ADHD kids apparently tend to hoard rather than spend tokens. So I had to set a limit on how many poker chips he could accumulate before having to spend some of them on something.View Thread

Posted byladysailor44

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Reply: adhd and meds

Bentol (Dicyclomine) helps relieve the abdominal pains that Adderall seems to...

Posted by ladysailor44

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:adhd and meds Bentol (Dicyclomine) helps relieve the abdominal pains that Adderall seems to...

Reply: Tricks for dealing with ADD / ADHD other than medi...

Another mind trick I use came about because I could never remember whether I'd brought...

Posted by ladysailor44

82 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:Tricks for dealing with ADD / ADHD other than medicines or supplements. Another mind trick I use came about because I could never remember whether I'd brought...

Reply: Tricks for dealing with ADD / ADHD other than medi...

I accidentally put my first list of mind tricks under the "Tips" section (see "Have...

Posted by ladysailor44

82 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:Tricks for dealing with ADD / ADHD other than medicines or supplements. I accidentally put my first list of mind tricks under the "Tips" section (see "Have...

Have backups in place.

I'm a 58 year old female with severe ADHD. I know there are certain things I am...

Posted by ladysailor44

I'm a 58 year old female with severe ADHD. I know there are certain things I am probably going to mess up on a regular basis...so I just have backups in place ready to use to recover from my mistakes. For example, I know I'm going to periodically leave my headlights or dome light on and run my car battery down. So I keep a portable battery jumper in the car. I know I'll forget how to use the thing, so I have large instructions taped to it--and a flashlight on a lanyard tied to its handle, so that I can read the instructions in the dark. I know I'll forget to recharge it after I use it, so as soon as I use it I put it in the front seat--that way when I get home, I see it and remember to take it out and plug it in. I know after it's recharged, I'll forget to put it back into the car; so I always plug it into the outlet in my carport--and leave it sitting directly behind my car. I can't pull out of the carport without running over the top of it, so that usually works! I know if I have to jump start my car at home, I'll probably get distracted and walk away during the 15 minutes I need to leave the engine running--which means the car will probably run out of gas--so I keep a can of gas ready. I also keep a funnel ready in case I forget to fill my gas can; so that in a real emergency I can empty the gas from my lawnmower into it!
I prefer buying cars with manual transmissions, just so that I can jump start them if necessary. I tend to forget how to do that too; so I keep a sheet with large instructions on it in my glove box--together with a flashlight. When I park, I routinely choose parking spaces on a slope and park so that I can get out of them going forward. In parking garages, I favor backing in so that the hood of my car is accessible for someone to jump start me. And of course, in addition to my battery jumper, I also keep a set of jumper cables with instructions attached to them.
I know I'll periodically lose my car keys or house keys; so I keep several sets of spares--one in my kitchen drawer, one in a designated folder in my file cabinet, and one in my son's pocket! and another set with a friend. I know I'll periodically lose my purse; so I also keep some cash in the same folder in my file cabinet. I know I'll periodically misplace my credit card, so I have two credit cards and keep one in the folder in my file cabinet. I know I'm going to lose phone numbers & addresses, etc.; so I write key information like that down on several index cards that I keep in different places in my purse...so that if I take one out and forget to put it back, there's still another one in there.
I know I'll use the last check in my checkbook without noticing it until I go to write another check...so I keep an extra check in a zipper pocket inside my purse. I also keep several extra checks in the folder in my file cabinet.
You know what, with all these backups already in place...I can lose my purse, lose my car keys, walk out to my car with 10 minutes to make it to a dr's appointment, discover the battery is dead, run my car out of gas after jump starting it, and STILL make my appointment

I know I'm going to lose stuff, forget things, mess stuff up; and I just plan ahead for it, have backups in place, and it hardly puts a blip in my day!View Thread

Posted byladysailor44

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