Hello Ed, I am sorry to hear how ADHD has affected your life in this way. I am not in USA, I am in England, but would like to share my story with you. I am the mother of 2 children, a daughter aged 26 and son 25. My daughter was diagnosed on her 5th birthday as having ADHD and medicated accordingly. Her sleeping pattern was almost non existent and there were so many safety factors my husband and I dreaded on a daily basis. Our daughter had no fear factor to anything in life which stressed us out immensely. We followed the consultant's advice and she was admitted to hospital for 8 weeks to try out some dietary trial but they didn't see any improvement, albeit we felt that she appeared to be more rational. That consultant moved to London and we moved out of the area and was recommended to another of his colleagues near to where we then lived. The new consultant didn't agree with the ADHD diagnosis and felt it was more likely to be Aspergers Syndrome but this was never followed up, to my horror!!! Here medication was stopped at puberty to allow her body to develop and to be fair, we didn't notice any changes when the medication was withdrawn. Having moved again at age 21, my daughter went to see a new consultant and he prescribed her new medication which once again, the family and close friends didn't see any improvement but she continued as advised until she fell pregnant last year. She gave birth to a beautiful baby boy in the summer but due to her chaotic behaviour the Midwife reported her lifestyle to Social Services and they placed my Grandson in Local Authority Care immediately after he was born. We have had contact with him for 6 months, supervised at a contact centre and the courts instructed a General Psychiatrist to conduct a report for them (without the full background medical history of my daughter) who diagnosed Emotional Personality Disorder. Treatment would be weekly CBT for a period of 12-24 months and as this would not be completed within the timeframe laid down by our wonderful government of 6 months it was agreed by the local courts that he was to be adopted due to his mothers condition. Sadly, in 2 days time it will be the last time we see him until such time either he comes looking for us, or once he reaches 18 we can go looking for him. And, even sadder, my daughter is unable to secure her treatment because we live in a post-code lottery where this treatment is unavailable unless we pay private for it. This in my opinion, forces my daughter to be childless for the rest of her life.......... I have researched Aspergers Syndrome and can identify with its symptoms but no one is prepared to listen. It is taking all my strength to ensure my daughter does not do anything dangerous and I am currently fighting our government to secure her treatment following the mis-diagnosis and treatment as a child. On top of which, I also fight on a daily basis my husband who for whatever reason, does not recognise the condition(s).
I truly hope the powers of be get to grips with this condition so that treatment is provided for adults, and, that children are diagnosed correctly in the first place to alleviate the additional stress it causes to their parents in the process.
Stay strong and I hope you find a lady in your life who will appreciate your attributes and not take advantage of the hurdles which this condition challenges us with every day.