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Borderline Personality Disorder Exchange

Welcome to the Borderline Personality Exchange. Meet others with the same ... more

Announcements

Do you have Borderline Personality Disorder? This new Exchange has been developed so we can encourage each other, share tips to get through those down days, and/or just vent.

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trigger? -- i'm having a lot of "thoughts"......

feel like i need to write about some things cuz i have no one else to talk to til wednesday...

Posted by joynevercomes2me

feel like i need to write about some things cuz i have no one else to talk to til wednesday (therapist - i'll call her K). i've been having a lot of suicidal thoughts lately, and they're mostly based on my sister and other family issues. ok i know i'm grown and all, but i'm still having a hard time with the abandonment i felt when my sister left for college back in 1986 (i was and then she got married when i was 12. i'm now 34 so this was a long time ago, but now that i'm living back in my hometown, alot of things are hitting me. i've had alot of other issues concerning my sister, but what i'm having problems with now is that it seems like my family would rather be together without me, like they do things together when i can't because of work, etc. don't get me wrong, i don't want anything to do with my sister anymore, so it doesn't matter if i miss out on a night with her, but it's more complicated than that and i can't figure out the right words for it right now. about the suicidal thoughts...last week i scared myself bad enough to call the crisis line. last night i was seriously considering taking all my trazodone (about 25) - i figured if it didn't kill me i'd at least sleep for a really long time and not have to think about anything for that time. .....ok here's what set me off last nite...my family did absolutely nothing for me for my b-day last month. so yesterday was my mom's b-day and she told my dad she wanted to eat at my sister's pizza shop so she could spend her b-day with my sister and her family. so they had a party while i was at work. i just feel like if they don't want me around, i can take care of that for them. so i don't know........i texted my "friend" last nite but he just told me to stop thinking like that and then quit texting me. so i don't have anyone to talk to til i go see K on wednesday. that's a long time from now....and i don't want to call the crisis line again cuz they're going to want my info so they can send someone to check on me or take me to the hospital. i can't go to the hospital. there's no one else to take care of my pets if i go. so that's not an option. but i just don't want to be here anymore......and i don't want to be alone anymore....View Thread

Posted by joynevercomes2me

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:trigger? -- i'm having a lot of "thoughts"...... feel like i need to write about some things cuz i have no one else to talk to til wednesday...

just wanted to ask mary

what happened with the dr quackers, if i have been out of line i am sorry

Posted by dem242

19 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:just wanted to ask mary what happened with the dr quackers, if i have been out of line i am sorry

SSI question

has anyone here applied to SSI solely because of their mental issues? i've been gathering all the info...

Posted by joynevercomes2me

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:SSI question has anyone here applied to SSI solely because of their mental issues? i've been gathering all the info...

nothing really important...

well i went to my therapist. i'll call her K. she and i talked about alot of stuff. i told her about...

Posted by joynevercomes2me

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:nothing really important... well i went to my therapist. i'll call her K. she and i talked about alot of stuff. i told her about...

Hi.. again

Helloooooooo, everyone. How goes it? I haven't stuck my head in here for a while but I do...

Posted by thelovelylemontree

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Hi.. again Helloooooooo, everyone. How goes it? I haven't stuck my head in here for a while but I do...

hey evreyone

Was doing pretty well lately, but today is one of those days, I hate everyone and everything. I am about to...

Posted by Storm224

7 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:hey evreyone Was doing pretty well lately, but today is one of those days, I hate everyone and everything. I am about to...

Did you see the interview with Brandon Marshall?

Brandon Marshall is a Wide Receiver with the Miami Dolphins. He was diagnosed with Borderline Personality...

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Did you see the interview with Brandon Marshall? Brandon Marshall is a Wide Receiver with the Miami Dolphins. He was diagnosed with Borderline Personality...

Relationship with 4S?

I was just curious as to how many people here with BPD also have 4s? 4S is a sound disorder where everyday...

Posted by mommy2504

Take the Poll

Do you suffer from BPD and 4S?

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Relationship with 4S? I was just curious as to how many people here with BPD also have 4s? 4S is a sound disorder where everyday...

just saying hi

hi. i kinda just jumped into this by replying to that other post. so let me start over. i'm joy, and...

Posted by joynevercomes2me

7 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:just saying hi hi. i kinda just jumped into this by replying to that other post. so let me start over. i'm joy, and...

Trouble in Paridise

Here I am can't sleep again. Boyfriend feels he is being used. If anyone is being used it's my ex...

Posted by depressedinkansas

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Trouble in Paridise Here I am can't sleep again. Boyfriend feels he is being used. If anyone is being used it's my ex...

I need help figuring out my daughter

My daughter will be 40 this year and my husband and I have had problems since she was born. Someone...

Posted by Anon_232683

My daughter will be 40 this year and my husband and I have had problems since she was born. Someone suggested a mental defect that she was born with. She would never let us hug her or show her any affection. When she learned to walk she never wanted to be held. We had to distract her to get her to eat. She is extremely weight conscious to this day. She has insulted her younger sister, who had weight problems, to the point of tears for years. Sister had stomach bypass and is a size 2 now. Older sister is typically so jealous and hateful I finally told her I have had enough. I love her but I'm done! I'm tired of being the referee and putting up with her very hateful behavior. She accuses me of 'beating' her kids when they were little and saying I hate them all! This is so untrue and I don't know what planet she lives on. I have always loved all of my grandkids equally and I have lightly spatted them on the butt once or twice when they refused to listen but that was it. I do not believe in spanking kids. We live in another state and that was in part because of the problems she kept creating. She wasn't happy unless we were all upset. my aunt was exactly the same way. She told my son that he better make a choice...either me or her. He lives 5 minutes from her and I haven't heard from him for over a year. He called on my birthday and I typically get "obligatory" phone calls from him on birthdays, Christmas, Mother's Day. So he owes me absolutely nothing and if those 3 calls a year salved his guilty conscience, even before his sister's ultimatum then it is time to cut them both loose. After he married, his wife's family got a strangle hold on him and we rarely got to see them or their kids. I think I paid my dues many times over. I'm a hugger and always told them how much I loved them. Something I never got as a kid. I would like to know why I have been such a doormat and why my kids use me. I've loved them and done everything for them I could to make them happy. I assumed that would bring me the gift of their respect. Maybe we are all nuts!View Thread

Posted byAnon_232683

Take the Poll

Does anyone know if my oldest daughter might have a genetic mental condition that she can't help being the way she is? Obnoxious doesn't begin to describe her. She laughs when someone gets hurt or is embarrassed. She plays hurtful pranks on people. I took her for therapy. no luck

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:I need help figuring out my daughter My daughter will be 40 this year and my husband and I have had problems since she was born. Someone...

Hi all

I am new to this site and I wanted to say hi and hopefully get some response back. I have bipolar disorder,...

Posted by sledge17

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Hi all I am new to this site and I wanted to say hi and hopefully get some response back. I have bipolar disorder,...

taking a few days off

I am going to take some time off online at WebMD. I hope a stressing situation at home will resolve soon. ...

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

18 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:taking a few days off I am going to take some time off online at WebMD. I hope a stressing situation at home will resolve soon. ...

woooo hooooooooooooo

My Pristiq was increased on July 15. This morning, 9 days later, I got up and I am a new woman! The relief...

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:woooo hooooooooooooo My Pristiq was increased on July 15. This morning, 9 days later, I got up and I am a new woman! The relief...

Just one more thing

This is not my community. This is OUR community. Let's make it the BEST community on WebMD! We'll learn...

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Just one more thing This is not my community. This is OUR community. Let's make it the BEST community on WebMD! We'll learn...

storm224 - caution! religious answer regarding fo...

If I did not forgive, I would spend the rest of my life with bitterness and hate in my heart. That's not how...

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

If I did not forgive, I would spend the rest of my life with bitterness and hate in my heart. That's not how God wants us to live. From the time of the first sin in the Garden of Eden to the day that Jesus Christ died on the cross, God demanded that man offer a sacrifice as atonement for their sins. When Jesus was crucified, died on the cross, and then was raised again after three days, He replaced the need for man to offer their/our atonement for our sin.

God does not allow sin in His life. Remember in the scripture that Jesus cried from the cross "Father, why have You forsaken Me?" God turned away from Jesus on the cross when Jesus began to bear the weight of our sins upon Himself. When we ask Jesus to come into our hearts and forgive us of all our sins, He does that because He has already paid the price of our sin. Jesus is our representative. When we get to heaven, Jesus will stand with us before God and proclaim that we have believed and our sins are forgiven. Belief in Jesus Christ is all we need to get into heaven. We still sin and we still ask forgiveness for our sins but we are now the children of God.

Forgiveness isn't about the person who hurt us. They probably will never need to know that they have been forgiven. Forgiveness is for me. For me, so I don't have to spend the rest of my life angry. You've seen old, crotchety people, haven't you? I don't like being around them and their negative outlook on life. I want to be able to sleep at night without hate or malice towards other people. I want to find happiness and contentment so I can grow old gracefully.

Forgiving means erasing a wrong. In my own experience, I realize that I have truly forgiven my abuser because my heart-pain over the wrong has decreased and I feel no turmoil over the situation. I can talk about the incident and not feel my stomach tighten or my voice become constricted. I have no tears, no anguish, no hateful thoughts.

Forgiveness is truly a blessing from God. We can be at peace with ourselves.

…...................................................

My forgiveness of my uncle, the girl, and the boy was easy because my uncle is dead, I don't know where the girl is, and when I see the boy (man) has returned to town, I avoid him.

My mother has dementia and lives in a make-believe world. She would have no idea what I meant if I went to the nursing home and told her I forgave her. I did forgive her several years ago but with the remembrance of the early abuse, I have "taken back" my forgiveness.

My father died when I was 14. Like I have done with my mother, I have "taken back" my forgiveness to him.

Someday I want to forgive my parents, but it is something that I have to work towards. The final memories are simply too painful right now.

….................................................

I hope this answers your question.

Love,
MaryView Thread

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:storm224 - caution! religious answer regarding forgiveness If I did not forgive, I would spend the rest of my life with bitterness and hate in my heart. That's not how...

storm224

You asked about forgiveness. I'm working on my 'sermon' and will post it sometime tomorrow. Mary

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:storm224 You asked about forgiveness. I'm working on my 'sermon' and will post it sometime tomorrow. Mary

mary need your opinion

Mary if you have time could you please read my response to storm 224 on the thread NEW TO ALL THIS......

Posted by it_is_what_it_is

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:mary need your opinion Mary if you have time could you please read my response to storm 224 on the thread NEW TO ALL THIS......

healthy copping skill, any ideas??????????????????...

hi, just wondering if any one out there wants to share there day today copping skills or any other...

Posted by it_is_what_it_is

6 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:healthy copping skill, any ideas???????????????????????????????????? hi, just wondering if any one out there wants to share there day today copping skills or any other...

Overwhelmed

I am searching for answers but overwhelmed with questions right now. I have been in therapy and on...

Posted by susiep1963

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Overwhelmed I am searching for answers but overwhelmed with questions right now. I have been in therapy and on...

Welcome Storm224

Hello Storm. First things first...you must clean up your language. The dictionary has thousands of...

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

Hello Storm. First things first...you must clean up your language. The dictionary has thousands of adjectives. Choose from them and leave the cussing for off-line conversations. I'm concerned that your original post will be deleted because of your language, so I have started this conversation.
I agree with you that it is a relief knowing there are other Borderlines in the world. How did I feel when my therapist diagnosed me? I was very angry. I totally disagreed with him and then we went through the criteria one item at a time. After that, I was just totally frustrated, like I didn't have enough problems already.

On the right hand side of this page is an area called Tips. Look at the topic "Identifying Borderline Personality Disorder". It may help you better understand this disorder.

As far as sharing with others, I wouldn't do it. Most people freak out when they find out you are depressed, let alone having another mental health diagnosis. People are afraid of mental illness and they just don't know what to say. As far as being "crazy" - we are NOT crazy. We have a disorder that is difficult to treat. We did not ask for this, no more than a diabetic would ask for diabetes.

I'm glad you are in therapy. Hopefully your therapist will teach you the DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) skills. Those skills are vital to living with Borderlline Personality. You can find tons of information about DBT on the internet.

I hope you'll post often so we get to know you. This is a slow community and a lot of people come and go. I find it frustrating sometimes but if enough will stay around, I believe we'll all be able to help each other.

Sincerely,
MaryView Thread

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Welcome Storm224 Hello Storm. First things first...you must clean up your language. The dictionary has thousands of...

New To All This

I'm new to all this kind of stuff but I was looking for friends with BPD that I can talk to and have...

Posted by ItaliaNikki5

13 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:New To All This I'm new to all this kind of stuff but I was looking for friends with BPD that I can talk to and have...

I am stuck and not moving forward

I am a single 43 year old woman and was diagnosed BPD about three years ago and taking Geodon which helps...

Posted by Anon_227762

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:I am stuck and not moving forward I am a single 43 year old woman and was diagnosed BPD about three years ago and taking Geodon which helps...

To my friends who need a boost

I was sent this in an email and just felt led to share it with you: May today there be peace within. May...

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:To my friends who need a boost I was sent this in an email and just felt led to share it with you: May today there be peace within. May...

please help me.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------...

Posted by iwanttostop

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:please help me. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------...

are you better off

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------...

Posted by iwanttostop

8 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:are you better off ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------...

How am I?

I'm depressed and my meds are not working. Thank goodness I see my new psychiatrist on July 15. He will have...

I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.

Posted by MarySings

7 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:How am I? I'm depressed and my meds are not working. Thank goodness I see my new psychiatrist on July 15. He will have...

New Here

I have been diagnosed with BPD and depression. My Dr. prescribed me Adderall and Seroquel. Any insights on to...

Posted by JM1313

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:New Here I have been diagnosed with BPD and depression. My Dr. prescribed me Adderall and Seroquel. Any insights on to...

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Borderline Personality Disorder Exchange

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