I am very happy that I found this board because it's so nice. It will tell you the truth about things and also tell you how to handle it. I find it a wonderful site!
This is for Jenna291 and my other sister,Rachael 167.It has always been my pleasure, that I met you two.I love you both but don't know what to do.
My sick (cirrhosis) boyfriend is dying and he really doesn't love me and never did.(22yrs) Don't worry about that, my problem is trying to show him God and remind all the miracles he saw happen to me with his own two eye's.
O.k, O.K., The truth is I just found out that I will lose my other breast, the brain tumor, and my liver. I'm a little bit scared but I'm mostly scared for my son and daughter.They don't deserve one speck of compassion from me, but you know mother's love there kids even if the child tried to kill you.
All of these things I'm saying is me being selfish I guess. I raised my kids with tons of love, respect humans, ignore bad ones, no stealing, cheating, and serious lying. Bottom line is this. My children never knew me and now I'm a dead person with stage4 breast cancer, a tumor in my brain, and I can't talk anymore tonight, I'll write you tomorrow.
Hey Guy's, (my grandmother would say,"hey is for horses."
I'm sorry I didn't get back sooner, but I'm having to deal with a BIG baby and his liver!
The tumor is twice as big as last year but nothing to worry about. It's still considered small and he just want's to watch it. If anybody on here needs a brain MRI, make sure you insist on a "open MRI" and make sure you get a tranquilizer from your doctor for it. It wasn't bad except for the loud ass noise it made! I had on ear covers and I still thought it was going to make me deaf!
Thank you for telling me that Jenna, but as far as me being strong goes, everyone of you on here are just as strong. We are all as strong as we have to be, what alternative do we have? Sitting around crying won't do a bit of good and we all want to be good examples for the newbies.
All you guys are so sweet to tell me I'm strong. Do you know that not one person in my family, nor my ex-husband has said that to me? Not my children, sister's or brother's have said anything, except to tell me how awful I was 30yrs. ago.(I was a baby)
Update on my boyfriend...dut, dut, dut.. do....I decided that I'm not going to spend his last few month's fighting. I have loved him for 20yrs., and I will make things as nice for him as I can. Which means of course, being his slave! I decided that that's a small sacrifice, for God to let us have this time together, he should be dead. He's already been to the hospital 3times since I've been here. One time he was in a coma! (liver disease, for you guy's who don"t know)
This sounds corny but stay STRONG and God bless all of you! God give you all the strength that's sometimes hidden inside you.
When I found out that I had stage 3 breast cancer, I was devastated. I hadn't spoken to my sister in 10yrs. and I felt so lonesome for her. I told my husband not to tell her or any of my family members that I was sick, because I felt like they should have been there for me when I was well and not just because I had cancer, and they thought I was dying.
Anyway, the first person he called was my sister and I was so glad! Call your sister, she will be so happy! No matter what your fight was about, she is your sister and she will need you now more then ever. When mine called me, we just started talking like we saw each other yesterday. I needed her so much, & she went to chemo and sat with me all those hrs. that I had to stay hooked up. Now, we are closer then ever.
If you want to help her, you will have to be very strong and not talk or think about death. They told me that my odds for living were very bad, yet here I am today, 3yrs. later and going strong. I'm sorry if you've lost family member's to cancer before, but you can't think about that now (I mean as far as you or your sister go) Because everybody is different and only God knows who will live or die. In my case, God blessed me, by not letting me be the least bit sick.
My doctor couldn't get over it. I never got nauseated from the chemo(that's almost unheard of) & I could eat any food, all the time. The bottom line is I stopped reading the horror stories on the internet, trusted God and just fought the cancer. With God's help, my sister and the lady's on here, I didn't die, plus I got my sister back! Call your sister so both of you can fight the cancer together! God bless you both.View Thread
I wanted to answer all of you separately, but my chemo brain makes that impossible! (laugh) You all wrote such beautiful things that you made me cry.(tears of joy) You seem to care about me more then my family and close friends. I know, it's because they are so scared, I make them see their own mortality, so they would rather pretend I'm not sick and everything is fine. All of us on here know that they're in for a rude awakening.
1st Rachael, I understood and believe everything you wrote. Me understanding you and me being able to do it are two different things. My ex is scared sh@#%less for me to die, so he acts meaner. My boyfriend is scared sh##$%&less that he's going to hell when he dies, so he all the sudden wants to distance himself from me. I promise you that I never preach to him, or even talk about God, unless he asks me. I love you for everything you told me. As for my children, they will have to explain their behavior to a higher power. By the way, I love your new name (NaLuk) for me!
2nd, Cindy, Thank you for telling me it was o.k. to cry, and say what I feel, even if the feeling don't sound so nice. You girls are my only support group. I don't drive and sometimes I can't even leave my house, so it's wonderful to have you every-time I need you. I love you.
3rd, Sweet Jenna, Thanks for being so sweet to care enough to write me. If it weren't for you girl's, I don't think I ever could have made it all these 3yrs. Next week is my MRI for the brain tumor, I will let you all know as soon as I find out.
4th, last but not least Diytestkits, thank you so much for your pearls of wisdom and even caring. You sound so very sweet and I hope to talk to you soon.(after my MRI) I'm sorry that I haven't been back here in a month! I can hardly believe it's been so long. I just found out that my boyfriend has cirrhosis of the liver. I found out because he was sleeping on my floor in the living room and I turned him over to say,"come on, lets go to bed now?" All the sudden, blood just poured out his mouth and I thought he was dead. Obliviously, he made it and now between the two of us, he's dead meat. I'm trying to be the happy person I was after I beat cancer but I can't seem to pull it off. Thank you do much for your concern.View Thread
Don't waste your mind thinking I was cheated. I have lived a life that anybody would envy! I had the greatest life on earth! It really bothers me about my spoiled rotten children though.
Their father said he would pay me what ever they cost, as long as I didn't involve him in school, punishments, or physical contact. I said, "Great Deal!" You pay and I will put you on the highest pedestal imaginable.
See he's the only truly good man that I have ever met.( we met in high school). He did his part and more because I'd make him be physical with them because I know him. I'd tell my daughter "grab him and hug him, he's just bashful.
Bottom line is. I put him on the HIGHEST pedestal, and made him out to be the most wonderful man on earth. I did it because I thought all kids need a special person to look up to. In my hast to be the perfect mother, I picked him up and put myself down. He still loves me today and doesn't know or want to know how to put him in the normal man roll. He'd rather be the king and I'm the one who did it.
I have been a loved person, and I thank God everyday for that. I've only loved one, but I got to have that wonderful year and will cherish it until I die.
God has his reason for taking my baby's away and I try to never question him. I do know that they are going to be so sorry, guilty, and full of remorse and it will be too late. The funny thing is I don't want that to happen to them. I never want them to hurt, ever!
If you"er having trouble getting to and from your treatments, call the American Cancer Society. They will make sure you have a ride to all your appointments. I called on a Monday and they made sure I had a ride on Wed for my radiation treatments. They get you rides for the whole week, then you call again for the next week. They are wonderful! Get the phone # from the phone book or the internet. God bless you all!View Thread
I think my brain tumor is kicking in or it could just be my normal crazy self. I still don't know what the Pink Bus is. Are you serious about the menu?
The American Cancer Society really will get you rides to & from Doc's, chemo, radiation and what ever. I didn't have a ride to my radiation treatment's, so I called them 2days in advance and always got a ride. Boy, did I meet some strange people! (they were nice but VERY strange.) They would volunteer giving people rides, but nobody knew because it's not advertised. I found out from a chemo nurse. I'm going to put it up on the helpful resource site. I can't believe I didn't think of it sooner.
I think George Clooney is gay(just my opinion & you know what they say about opinion's) what a damn wast for us one & some, two no boob gals! As always, it was fun talking to you.
Sorry that I didn't meet Pinkie, or did I?(chemo brain) Who is George Clooney? You don't mean the real George, do you? Did any of you ever go to go to the depression board, about 4yrs.ago? I did and it use to be a great place to go for cheering up! It was before they made it so confusing, Everything was on one page, so it was easy to find a person and certain questions. There use to be about six people who were hysterical! One day one of us was depressed and the others would help, then another day it would be one of the others and so on. Almost everyday, new people would be very upset and write on the board and they always said how happy they were to find us. It was great fun. I know how funny that sounds seeing how it was the depression board. It some how worked & I miss it! People always went away feeling happier and who ever wasn't depressed that day felt better too. They felt better because they could help somebody in need. Well, I will talk to you later.
What are these people talking about? Are people who come on here being spammed? How low can a person get? Geezz! There has to be something that Web MD can do, they have so many great sites! I find it so difficult believing how terrible some people are. Geez Louise!!!