Caregiving Community: Support Group

Have been living with high risk HPV for about 4 years now. I have had a colcoscopy and a vaginal...

Posted by An_251116

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Sole caregiver at 66 for 90yo mother in my home......

Any tips welcome for keeping my spirits up? I retired after 49 years of work in Jan so am feeling a bit...

Posted by An_250527

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skin of penis problem(atty layer under the skin of...

I have some problem with my skin of the penis.It needs moisturizing continously due to friction with my clothes...

Posted by omarali

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my skin of the penis needs moisturizing continously due to friction with my clothes and legs.IF I didn't moisturise the skin of penis ,the skin adhere to underwear and i feel pain with skin and i quickly moisturize and roll it .fatty layer underpenis skin is very reduced

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Tips for properly moving my stroke patient

I have been a caregiver for 5 years,and have just taken on caring for a stroke recoverer. Her husband has...

Posted by helperchic

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Boyfriends stroke

My BF of two years had a very serious stroke almost two months ago..This situation has to be the hardest I've...

Posted by Bettylo

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Am I wrong?

My FIL has his voice box taken out due to Cancer. For 4 weeks I suctioned out his lungs from 6 or more times...

Posted by measha111

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Am I wrong?

My FIL has his voice box taken out due to Cancer. For 4 weeks I suctioned out his lungs from 6 or more times...

Posted by measha111

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Moms stroke

Hi, My Mom is 58 she has always worked, and had a very active social lifestyle. Two years ago she suffered...

Posted by Amalee1977

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Oral care for my husband

My Husbavd is in the later stages of alz. He resides in an assisted living home . We are...

Posted by An_245198

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Worried about my father's wellbeing as Mom's careg...

My mother had a stroke in 2005 and my father's been her primary caregiver. While she's never fully...

Posted by PDXtraveler

My mother had a stroke in 2005 and my father's been her primary caregiver.

While she's never fully recovered....she's pretty much happy if you buy her a Starbuck's and let her watch the Gem-Channel.

While my father's life is deteriorating.

In the beginning we all pitched in to help....Mom requested things and we got them for her. Tried to read to her...care for her. But she says no one will read to her adn then you show up with the book she's requested to spend the day with her and she doesn't want to she says she wants to paint....you buy hundreds of dollars of art supplies she says she needs and wants and thinks it would be good therapy for her condition. And they sit untouched.....she complains you didn't get the right ones...you buy the "right" ones and the also are never touched because now she wants to buy a hourse and take up horseback riding and gets upset no one will support her. Despite being 270 and can barely walk from the handicapped parking spot to the door of a store. Her whims change like the wind.....and I get that some of that is the stroke, though she was like that before....but she gets angry and takes it on her husband on us that we don't care and don't love her and won't help her.....because we won't buy the horse. It's crazy.

Sadly, prior to the stroke she pretty much only slept, watched TV and kept no schedule. And that continues know only magnified.

She was always strongwill and hardheaded and after the stroke that's gotten worse. She won't be told what to do and wants what she wants when she wants it.

In order to make life bearable you give in so her temper tantrums stop.

I see my father worn out, stressed and slipper futher into depression.

He's racked by guilt about what to do.

People suggest all sorts of things, but she doesn't want to do them....you set things up and then she refuses to get out of bed....

we're at our wits end. She was in an assisted care facility for awhile and she still had my father running ragged because she wanted this or that. But I think that was the best of a bad situation. Aty least Dad got a bit of a break and we new shge was getting consistent meds at consistent times because she will do what a stranger more readily.

But even there......she was only there 8 months and when we moved her out most of the new furniture and household items we bought her had to be taken to the dump despite having housecleaning service. She just is very very sloppy and doesn't like people cleaning around her.

How do we love and care for her in a respectful way and yet give my father some sort of quality of like......they're only in their 60's and he's active.View Thread

Posted by PDXtraveler

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Worried about my father's wellbeing as Mom's caregiver My mother had a stroke in 2005 and my father's been her primary caregiver. While she's never fully...

Grandpa

Hey community. My name is Britney and I am 27 years old. 3 years ago my mother moved out of the house...

Posted by bhenderson0684

Hey community. My name is Britney and I am 27 years old. 3 years ago my mother moved out of the house that is conviently located next to my grandpa. I was worried that there would not be anyone going to visit him considering I have an aunt and uncle, 2 cousins and one brother. Only one of the cousins is younger then me. So My boyfriend and I moved in next door so my grandpa would have company everyday and have someone close if something were to happen. At this time my grandpa was doing everything by himself. At this time he is 78. Let me make it very clear of my situation. I am 27 and have been putting off my life to make sure my grandpa is well taken care of. My brother and cousins are currently in school and working. My uncle and his wife are LOADED my aunt is in her upper 40s and retired from HP. My uncle has 2 welding business' that he just sold. I work a full time job and have been wanting and waiting to start my life and finish school get a better job, buy a house and start a family. About 7 years ago my granpa had a kidney transplant and it worked very well til about 1 year ago. He is now has 10% of his kidney functioning. He has major difficulties moving around. Every task is a TASK in itself. It takes him 20+ minutes to get dressed, he needs help off the couch, he doesn;t cook, clean or hardly bath by himself anymore. At this very moment he is in the hospital bc he has so much toxic material in his blood that he cant eat, pee, drink, nothing. except lay there and sleep. He just had emergency dialysis and seemed to b feeling better. Needless to say he will be coming home shortly if he continues to get better. Only problem is the family wants him to move into the house I am living in. Which indirectly makes me main caregiver. He will need 24 hour service. I am working a full time job 7-5 then I go to school 2-4 nights a week from 6-10 pm. That means I would be out of the house from 7-11. No time to take care of my grandpa. I feel very awful for not being there as much as I would like but I cannot put off my life anymore so everyone else can continue on with what they do. It is my mom and my uncles responsiblity to take care iof there father. I have one. Plus I do not want to ever have to make a life changing desicion or have to help him take a shower or wipe his butt. I do not think that is something the granddaughter should do. Please help me. I need help and FAST. My grandfather will be leaving the hospital soon and I dont know what to do. I need to talk to my uncle but I am not sure what to say and I dont want to make anyone upset with my decsions. PleaSE HElpView Thread

Posted by bhenderson0684

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Grandpa

Hey community. My name is Britney and I am 27 years old. 3 years ago my mother moved out of the house...

Posted by bhenderson0684

Hey community. My name is Britney and I am 27 years old. 3 years ago my mother moved out of the house that is conviently located next to my grandpa. I was worried that there would not be anyone going to visit him considering I have an aunt and uncle, 2 cousins and one brother. Only one of the cousins is younger then me. So My boyfriend and I moved in next door so my grandpa would have company everyday and have someone close if something were to happen. At this time my grandpa was doing everything by himself. At this time he is 78. Let me make it very clear of my situation. I am 27 and have been putting off my life to make sure my grandpa is well taken care of. My brother and cousins are currently in school and working. My uncle and his wife are LOADED my aunt is in her upper 40s and retired from HP. My uncle has 2 welding business' that he just sold. I work a full time job and have been wanting and waiting to start my life and finish school get a better job, buy a house and start a family. About 7 years ago my granpa had a kidney transplant and it worked very well til about 1 year ago. He is now has 10% of his kidney functioning. He has major difficulties moving around. Every task is a TASK in itself. It takes him 20+ minutes to get dressed, he needs help off the couch, he doesn;t cook, clean or hardly bath by himself anymore. At this very moment he is in the hospital bc he has so much toxic material in his blood that he cant eat, pee, drink, nothing. except lay there and sleep. He just had emergency dialysis and seemed to b feeling better. Needless to say he will be coming home shortly if he continues to get better. Only problem is the family wants him to move into the house I am living in. Which indirectly makes me main caregiver. He will need 24 hour service. I am working a full time job 7-5 then I go to school 2-4 nights a week from 6-10 pm. That means I would be out of the house from 7-11. No time to take care of my grandpa. I feel very awful for not being there as much as I would like but I cannot put off my life anymore so everyone else can continue on with what they do. It is my mom and my uncles responsiblity to take care iof there father. I have one. Plus I do not want to ever have to make a life changing desicion or have to help him take a shower or wipe his butt. I do not think that is something the granddaughter should do. Please help me. I need help and FAST. My grandfather will be leaving the hospital soon and I dont know what to do. I need to talk to my uncle but I am not sure what to say and I dont want to make anyone upset with my decsions. PleaSE HElpView Thread

Posted by bhenderson0684

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appetite stimulant

Posted by lajelo1964

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Hi i'm new to this community. My mother was recently placed in a nursing home due to a possible secondary stroke. She is now refusing meals and they are suggesting intubation feeding. does anybody know of anything else to stimulate appetite.

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New to group - needing support

Hi I have just found this group and am grateful to have a place to come to. I moved home to live with my...

Posted by erinj833

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late-stage alzheimers & obesity

We've been caring for my MIL for about 4 months now in our home. Previously she'd been at a nursing facility...

Posted by jdwwrd10

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multivitamins and protein shakes

I was wondering if you give an older patient who is not eating properly a protein shake (such as ensure)...

Posted by brendams2

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Need some Advice - PLEASE

Hello: I don't know where to start. My mother is quite ill at the moment. She was diagnosed with...

Posted by klsmedtrans

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Caregiver of husband with COPD and asthma

NEED HELP/ADVICE/ANYTHING: I am married to a very kind loving man who puts me first even with his COPD....

Posted by dailymeditation

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Need your help!

Posted by dscout11

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What are my rights as a caregiver who`s patient is...

Hello~ I began caring for elderly neighbor quite by accident-just helping her after her cousin passed.It...

Posted by Anon_233834

Hello~ I began caring for elderly neighbor quite by accident-just helping her after her cousin passed.It took little time to realize she needed much more than thought & her cousin had handles all including her meds,finances,meals,shopping,MD`s-all.i gladly took all this over & we fast became BEST friends.She had been a social worker which I also had done much of & I had nursing in my back-ground as well as being brought up by both sides of familys' elders & I did lots of elderly & child-care.my woman(after 3 yrs of 7-days wk care & no $$ for year then only minimal because we just loved ea. other)got compression fractures in back after twisying w/new heavier w/tray walker.Long story here but got her to hospital for X-rays after her MD never responded.We got back home-still no word from her MD.Four days later i threatened them into calling at which time was told they could not drop everything for her & could see her in 2 wks.We let them go & found another.In meantime,time was fast approaching for my yearly trip to NH.Could not cancel as son had house fire & in hotel & they needed help.Eileen & I discussed temp nursing rehab until I got back.I called her brothers(4 bros all elderly as well,1-POA,etc).The latter hadn`t ever been to see her in Fl(27 yrs),never knew her finances(I enlightened him as I was uncomfy w/others money & my lady has a bit of demensia).He all of a sudden decided to visit & hoped/tried to get her in home(for good)within 24 hrs of his arrival.I have legal medical access to records & to have knowledge of what is happening,etc.I came home to take her home(or I would have stayed at sons longer,too!)& was told to back off,I have no rights only as a friend,cannot take her home,out to eat-or anything!? We are BOTH hurting & confused.There has also been HUGE degrees of abuse & neglect at this home,her losing 20 lbs,etc.,etc.Do I have rights as the only person in her life all of these years, sacrificing my home/family & life,taking minimal pay,making a SOLEMN promise to her that I would stay by her side & allow her wish to pass on in her home possible? No-one even visited-not just family,near no-one in 3 years?Any ideas will be appreciated as I think I am heart-broken & there`s even much more.MView Thread

Posted byAnon_233834

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Do caregivers have any legal rights when client has gone to nursing home and they have been sole person in their life for few years?

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cherios

My husband is in mid-stage alzheimer disease and so far I have cared for him in our home. One big problem I am...

Posted by cherios

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help

have been married for 27 yrs my husband was diagnosed with lung cancer in feb 2010 and in 2011 it came back...

Posted by denisecg

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Hip fracture

I take care of a 93 year old senior who fell yesterday and I am needing information about to not feel guilty (...

Posted by Supriti

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Stroke recovery

My husband suffered a stroke 3 weeks ago today, he is home and doing pretty good now but still needs some...

Posted by emerson2011

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sas51

I was studying WebMD RA and came across an article on help for caregivers and now I cant locate it. Any help...

Posted by An_188413

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Benefits of air mattress as compared to foam mattr...

My neighbor asked me to find out about the benefits of air and foam mattresses and the pros and cons of each....

Posted by slyounts

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Mom has Alzheimer's and having TIA strokes

My Mom is in Assisted Living now, and has mid-stage Alzheimer's. She just had her 2nd (that we know of ) TIA...

Posted by jlarc

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can i receive payment for being a caregiver while ...

i've been receiving ssi for over 15 yrs for mental and physical reasons. my mother had a stroke almost 3 yrs...

Posted by An_188412

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:can i receive payment for being a caregiver while receiving ssi? i've been receiving ssi for over 15 yrs for mental and physical reasons. my mother had a stroke almost 3 yrs...

the forgotten caregiver and mental illness

I see many supports for those who have family with Autism or Alz or strokes /diabetes.Everyone...

Posted by mentalIllnessCaregiver

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:the forgotten caregiver and mental illness I see many supports for those who have family with Autism or Alz or strokes /diabetes.Everyone...