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Caregiving Community

Taking care of a loved one is an honor. It can also overwhelm you and make you ... more

Reply: Worried about my father's wellbeing as Mom's careg...

Dear PDXtraveler, My heart goes out to you. It sounds like, at this point, that your...

Posted by 2010guardian

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:Worried about my father's wellbeing as Mom's caregiver Dear PDXtraveler, My heart goes out to you. It sounds like, at this point, that your...

Reply: multivitamins and protein shakes

Hi Brendams2, I used to be a distributor of well known vitamins and protein. One of...

Posted by 2010guardian

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:multivitamins and protein shakes Hi Brendams2, I used to be a distributor of well known vitamins and protein. One of...

Reply: Grandpa

Hello Britney, You are such a loving and caring person. I've never heard of a young...

Posted by 2010guardian

Hello Britney,

You are such a loving and caring person. I've never heard of a young person caring so much for a grandparent. You have gone above and beyond in helping and making memories with your grandpa. You have received more blessings through this than anyone else possibly can.

No one expects you to put your life on hold. You have made that choice. So you must be firm and determined not to allow your relatives to give you a guilt feeling or to make you think you are responsible for your grandpa. The people who want to move him in with you, are very selfish and self-centered people.

There are some things you can do immediately for your support sysytem:
#1 Make and appointment with the hospital social worker. Tell her very frankly how you feel. Through this, she can help through talking with the responsible people.
#2 thru this, talk to his doctor and let him know that you cannot continue to take care of grandpa since he is in such bad condition.
#3 talk to a lawyer. if you have not signed papers to become grandpa's durable medical power of attorney, then find out who is legally responsible. As you say, I'm sure it would be his children who don't want to face this issue.
#4 Be strong and firm! Contact your pastor, priest, or even a clergyman in the hospital. You need spiritual strength and support.

Grandpa's condition sounds severe and it sounds like he will need 24 hr. care. His doctor can write that order, and grandpa can go to a home which provides this care.

I'm talking from experience. My husband, being the youngest, was the one to take care of his mother. He moved her into our home and expected me to care for her while I was working and to come home at lunch to fix her something to eat, plus call on break or go home on break and check on her. Most of the time, he was enjoying himself some place else. When I quit work due to weakness, he then would not let me off the property because Mom might have to go to the bathroom. I felt I had a log chain around my ankle and was chained to her bed. I was so depressed. I finally told him he would have to chose between me and his mother, as I could not go on anymore like this. Not long after this, his Mom was in the hospital. We talked to the social worker and I told the doctor that I couldn't take care of her anymore. So he wrote up the order stating that she needed 24 hr. care and she was placed in a nursing home. So it was made easier on us since the doctor told her she needed 24 hr medical care.
I will be praying for you and your family.

KathyView Thread

Posted by2010guardian

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:Grandpa Hello Britney, You are such a loving and caring person. I've never heard of a young...

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