I want to say I'm sorry to all the ladies who lost precious babies. I mc on July 18th at 8 weeks and don't feel like I'm getting much past it- a pervasive sadness seems to stick. How do you get past something that you can't really talk about? I could talk more about the passing of my Dad but whoa on the miscarriage stuff! I feel like women are locked in a special closet for miscarriages. I know our babies are in heaven but that doesn't always do it.View Thread
I am so sorry to hear about your losses. But don't abandon the professional help boat because the one counselor failed. Not all patients and counselors make a good fit and we need to try again with someone else. Talk to your baby truthfully on an age appropriate basis. They don't always want as much info as we think they are asking. Journaling is also considered a useful tool too. Sometimes I have to write down my fears and compare it to my reality and they don't always match. My reality is actually better than my fears. Counseling may also help with your trust issues. You don't want to make your daughter fearful of a world that she has to participate in one day and I am sure you want to participate more in the world too and not fear it so badly. Grieve your loss. Our church has a grief recovery group- is there anything like that in your area?? It was a tremendous help when I lost my dad and when I miscarried a month ago.
I think you feel very let down by your doctor who delivered your baby but know from a medical point of view that there is only so much professionals can do in the labor and delivery process. We feel awful about losing our littlest patients too. Unless there was gross malpractice or negligence, the United States for all its medical advantages still has one of the highest infant mortality rates. I know that this will be of little comfort to you. The medical community is still learning so much when it comes to neonatal care. We have come a long way but we can improve.
My prayers go out to you. I hope you find comfort in the days to come and get stronger.View Thread
I miscarried on 7/18 at 8 wks and am 45 yrs old. A week later,my husband had a seizure while driving and wrecked up his car. (Thankfully he is okay) Driving is out for him. It has just been just too much in too small a space of time. All I want to do is sleep. I know one heals but this just hurts soo muchView Thread
I am sorry for your loss but know this: IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!!! I am 45 and just lost my first pregnancy and it doesn't hurt any less at my age. Crying is normal, you have lost something precious. Grieve your loss, it's okay. I am still stumbling myself. I am so tired like there isn't enough sleep. I also know what an isolating experience this can be, it isn't something very open. I hope you find someone to confide in. God Bless You!!!View Thread
Thank you for your kind reply. I am sorry for your loss. I know that is is devastiing. Somebody likened miscarriage to being drafted into a club that you never wanted to join. Right now, work is the worst place. I work 12 hr night shifts at a small hospital with too much time on my hands. I just feel so tired. In September, I am having ankle replacement surgery and looking forward to it because I will have a significant period of time off.
I noticed that miscarriages aren't really talked about. Some say they are sorry, others say nothing. It feels like a taboo outside of something like this. Thank God for kind souls like you. I wish you healing too.View Thread