Coping with Pregnancy Loss Community
Only someone who has been there can know exactly what you are feeling after the ... more
I felt okay during my pregnancy with him, but I knew that I would have..issues after he was born. I didnt feel that bond that most moms tell about. I knew I loved him, but I didnt want him. So! While batteling severe postpartum his dad got laid off from work!! So I had to return to work ...after planning for 9 months to stay home. I was not ready to return to work, people were so happy and had nothing but nice things to say about how adorable my son was..I didnt care to hear it. So after 3 different types of medication. I have given up on trying to use medication to get better. My Son is now 18 months old and I am still not happy. Please don't think that I havent tried..In september 2010 I had a miscarriage..at 8 weeks i started spotting and my doctor had me come in to " put my mind at ease for the weekend"..yeah a whole lot that did..I had seen my little " DOT" at 6weeks, I saw it's tiny heartbeat..and that day seemed like the worst day of my life. I was really hoping that maybe another pregnancy would " knock it out of me"... it only made it worse. My OB promptly started me on medication..knowing my ongoing history.. I took the meds for a while..but stopped..nothing helps. I don't know how to get out of this..my mom says i need to snap out of it and be a mom. I just don't know how.. Like I said I love my son I know I do. I just would rather not be around him. And then a miscarriage..I feel so Lost.
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