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This should be explained to him and if he doesn't respond appropriately, that's another red flag.
Dating can be uncomfortable and either he is out of practice or clueless.View Thread
I have a high sex drive and I really enjoy pleasuring my partner. I swore I would never get into a relationship with a woman who didn't absolutely love sex. My first longer term sexual relationship was at age 33. I met her through computer dating (pre internet). We made love on the first date. She was highly intelligent, curvaceous and as interested in sex as I was. We went to XXX movies together, groped each other's crotches while driving and she was thrilled to give me a quicky even if she wasn't aroused. The downside is that she couldn't work. She was the perfect date.
I met my wife to be around the same time, at work. She had been sexually active for over 12 years and never had an orgasm. The first time we made love she orgasmed repeatedly. We made love so often that she walked bow legged. Eventually, she insisted on an exclusive relationship.
I ended the relationship with the first woman and two years later we got married. Over the years sex became less frequent and only when she initiated it. The variety of tolerable sexual activities also decreased. When we made love, she was a passionate lover and we would make love for hours, where she would have 100's of orgasms and stop when she was exhausted.
It's been over a year since we last made love and I'm not optimistic that we will ever make love again. It drive's me nuts that a woman who has such a high capacity for sexual pleasure won't let herself enjoy it.
Reflecting back, there had to be some issues (other than incompetent lovers) for to have had sex for 12 years and not enjoyed it. I've had a house, a kid, a dog and a partner.
Being in a sexless relationship really hurts.
If I had it to do over again, I might consider never getting married and only stay in a relationship that was mutually sexually fulfilling.View Thread
Take the Poll
Poll Results
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Yes13% (6)
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No87% (40)
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Maybe0% (0)
Cable TV has redefined what is acceptable to be shown. Check out 'Game of Thrones'.
Take a look at what is on the cover of the magazines at the checkout line at the grocery store.
I like looking at (not gawking or staring) women. I like a woman's face, her body, her physical fitness, how she carriers herself.
I haven't looked at hard core porn for over 30 years. A girlfriend and I went to XXX movies as a couple, something that was done then. I don't watch it now because I think it's tacky and how many times do you need to see the same sex acts.
Society has made child porn illegal and bestiality is probably considered not normal by the majority of people.
I do believe there is a line out there and it is up to the individual where to draw it.View Thread
Do you have tangible proof, like a recording or a witness, to verify his verbal agreement you mentioned in your reply to FCL? Do you have any written or electronic, e-mail, correspondence concerning his or a verbal agreement? Otherwise it's your word against his.
What state is this in? You can look up the states statues for further information on the legalities and or rights of the owner(s). If he is free to take pocession of the house or not and if you have any legal say in the matter. It doesn't seem right that a judge would allow this to happen let alone it not being brought up during the divorce, stating who gets the house and who pays for it.
Grasping at straws here; What about you selling 'your half', so to speak, of the house? Forcing him into an agreement with the new owner OR sell it out right to him? Is there a way, legally, to force him into signing an/the agreement, like have him served?
I'm affraid I don't see any other recourse than legally. Is your lawyer skilled in both real estate and divorce? If you research the states statues and find one that may work in your favor, bring it to your lawyers attn, he may have over looked it.View Thread
I understand why you are still there and I think I can understand how you feel too. It must be like a sort of temporary reprieve ... You know it's going to end but not quite yet. It's very reassuring that you are clear about what you want and what you will not accept and it's really great to be able to focus on other members of your family.
Please keep us updated and remember that we're here for you...View Thread
What branch of service is he entering into?View Thread
Just one thing to alway remember is NEVER STAY TOGETHER FOR A CHILD. If in the long run, you are not happy, you need to leave.
To many people stay together for the kids and it ends up being worse because of what you are doing in front of a child.
And on the other hand, i have seen it make couples happier than before and it completely changed the way they worked on the relationship.
So just remember, if it turns out not to be a great idea. Just be friends so the child has two parents that get along and love a child togetherView Thread
Is My Wife A DUD?
If I was your father little man, I'd be holding you by the ear and kicking your *ss from one end of the house to the other.
Grow a pair and stop whining about your sad little life.
Put your family ahead of your selfish little boy wants and BE A MAN!
Make sure your wife gets everything she needs medically and support wise from you, her family and yours. (If they're available)
Take care of your child and show him by example what a real man does when he's faced with a crisis.
HE DOESN'T ABANDON HIS FAMILY!View Thread
Let him know what it's costing you (him) and that the sooner he takes this problem and you seriously, the sooner you'll be done with it.
You may not realize it but your relationship is in serious jeopardy. At worst, affairs and eventual divorce. At best, you burying all your desires and needs to stay in a one-sided, selfish marriage.
You're worth so much more.
Good luck.
View Thread
As far as your relationship recovering... That will be up to both of you.
As a fellow 'survivor' of infidelity, (25 years hence) I have some insights that might be useful to your recovery or possibly your eventual separation.
I see very many coincidences in the affairs perpetrated on both of us and the way you responded (according to your writing) was very much the way I responded.
I see the last post was 3 months ago so I'm not going to go into any great detail here in case this is already an expired thread. If I see a response or an inquiry then I'll respond with more detailed information.
BTW... I read it all. I love cookies.View Thread
"I want to feel that she wants me. Feeling desired / wanted is a real turn on for men."
"I don't want my wife to have sex with me because she has to I want her to have sex with me because she wants me and wants to get off. The idea of a woman wanting me to make her orgasm turns me on like nothing else."
Now where you may need a little help yourself is the "border line rape" feeling. Lots of women are brought up NOT to initiate and enjoy the whole concept of 'being taken'.
In my own experience a little of both works the best.
Back to your first item... If more women understood that concept, that men want to feel desired and appreciated for their willingness to do whatever is necessary to please their lover. There would be a whole lot less cheating and divorcing going on in this country.View Thread
Take the Poll
Poll Results
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yes31% (251)
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yes we have kids14% (112)
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no17% (136)
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hell no27% (217)
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confused????:(10% (81)
Then follow through.
Presto... She burns off the calories from the ice cream cone. You get the 'closeness' all of us men desire. Plus you fill the need she was fishing for by complimenting her!
It's a Win - Win - Win.View Thread
Can anybody help me out?????
I think I should get a kind a counseling form therapists..View Thread
She doesn't love you, she isn't attracted to you. As hard as it must have been to hear, she's been open and honest with you. It's time to move on with your life. It sounds like she'd be open to remaining friends. Would that be acceptable to you?View Thread
I think your MIL probably just doesn't realize that she's imposing - it sounds like she's a bit of a mother hen who is happiest when she has all of her chicks (you included) around her
View Thread
But don't just leave...talk to her about what you're feeling, about what this means. (For example, are you planning to see other people during this "break?" Are you expecting that she will or will not do the same?)
Especially if you are living together, there are things to be worked out.
There's nothing wrong with wanting to take a break--but do it right, and with regard for her and her needs.View Thread
25yrs
Unemp.
Together almost 8yrs., Married 4yrs.
None. Miscarried @10wks. 2yrs ago.
The South
TAking care of my 3 dogs.
Do yard work, then relax for Evening.View Thread
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