Instead of trying to make him see that what he did was wrong, you need to work on seeing that what he did is a clear reflection of how he feels about you. Don't waste your time trying to change him, he has made it clear (for 7 years according to you) that he doesn't plan to be faithful and that you are NOT the only one he wants.
He isn't going to change, the fact that he is still talking to her after you said you are leaving should be a clear indication of that. It sounds like you have accepted this as the norm in your relationship and I wonder if you really will leave in a few months? You have accepted it for 7 years, why all of a sudden are you done accepting it? Why wait a few months? Do you have friends or family so you can leave now? From what you have posted; I think he is going to suck you in again and then keep cheating on you.View Thread
Thank you tml, I am glad you posted that. I have gone back and read my posts a couple times and I just don't get where anyone would read anger in my words. (except in the last post of course) I am not angry, if anything I have been very humbled by my situation. My wife and I are in a great place now and have really managed to learn and move forward from where we were.
I appriciate your comments, now I will stop trying to figure out where I was angry!View Thread
Give me a break! Neither you or your wife know about me or my past. I am not reciting something from penthouse or a men's magazine, it was my life and past. This has been sea twit in my life with me and my wife so I am not sure why your wife would think I am a wounded bird. That is unless neither of you can read. We have gotten helped because we did want help, contrary to your comment. You are right, she should have stayed out of my situation just like you should. I commented because guard remembered me, not for opinionated know it alls to try to act like they know anything about me.
I will let my wife know you would love to read her reaction but she isn't like me, she could give a crap about responding to some jerk on the web. Yeah, NOW you hear anger in my words.
Please continue with your "help". To the op, I am done with you and your wife.View Thread
tlkittycat, i am just curious about your husband's parents being Jehonvah's Witness. Was your husband the same when you met him? I am just curious how he feels about celebrating holidays that must not have meant anything before you were married? My cousin also married a man that was raised a JW. It took a long time for him to feel comfortable celebrating. But now, he is the first in line to start inviting people over for dinner!View Thread
I am a lot like you, I don't know too many details about this case. I listen for a while but it just makes me mad so I stop watching! It's not irritating, it's the biggest story right now in the news, sadly to say. Its only natural to talk about it and compare opinions.View Thread
tmlmtlrl, I agree with what you are saying about how that word is really irritating when it is used even to explain something that actually happened. But, until someone is convicted of the crime in a court of law, everything is alleged. That is just the courts way of making sure people are innocent until proven guilty. Flawed yes but it's also fair to the person being convicted to make sure they get a fair trial.
In your example, as soon as he is convicted in a court the headlines will read, convicted of running over a police officer instead of allegedly running him over. Its all a process.
I do agree though, it's annoying when you know that it happened.View Thread
I wasn't implying anything I was just offering a different take on what you posted. There is a possibility that you are wrong, there is always that possibility. My advice is to let it go, wait until the next time he is there and see what happens. There are just to many senerios that could have happened but since he is the only one that knows what the picture is of, guesses will only cause more distress. If this were my wife I would do the same as guard and calm her down. I am not trying to convince you that it didn't happen or how you should feel. I am just pointing out that it may be different then how you thought it was. Hope it doesn't happen again and you can enjoy your son while he is having fun.View Thread
I agree with darlyn05, there is no way to know for sure if he took a picture of you. It is possible he was more interested in taking pictures of his son and that is how is phone landed in his lap, he may not have even noticed you were there. At the end when he was messing with his phone, maybe he was texting the picture of his son to his wife. The fact that you didn't directly see what the picture was of and you only saw the flash from the corner of your eye makes it possible that it wasn't you he was pointing his phone at. I would let it go and consider that you might be wrong about what he was doing. My cell can zoom pretty far so it is possible to take far away pics from a phone.View Thread
Asking him to choose between the mother of his children and the woman he has been dating for 6 months seems like a great way for the OP to be disapointed. The memory of the mother of his kids is not suppose to die. This is simple advice for someone that is dealing with an ex that was just a fling. Not as simple when the two of them have kids together.View Thread
great example of 2 people that were not prepared for this type of marriage. i guess you really have to understand yourself and your spouse and why you want this in your marriage for it to work. if you are doing it because its the ultimate fantasy and you want to say you experienced it then you should be ready for the trouble it brings with it.
with my parents, they both loved the way it brought them together in the bedroom. my mom told me that she loved the way my dad looked at her when they had a 3rd party with them. she said that there was more passion in their love making when there was someone else with them then when they were alone. sounds weird I know but it really worked for them.View Thread