Well ladies,\ I am in that relationship. We have been together for 7 years and we stopped having sex 6 years ago. I was going through a divorce when I met him and my kids were 13 and 17 at the time. I had to deal with a man that was fitting the divorce 100 %. This man that I am with is the most amazing man any woman could meet. having said that he said to m after seeking treatment form a male clinic " that I am to stressed out about the divorce and that he could not get attracted to me when I am stressed out over the divorce"
2014 it still goes on. He has refused to see a doctor to see if it is physical because he is 100% sure that it is mental. If we didn't have this issue hanging over our heads we would be perfect together and my kids love him and he loves my kids. So when this issue comes to slap you in the face for real one has to ask them selves how long can a person go feeling lonely in a relationship knowing they will never find another person like this again ?View Thread
taking a person to the doctor that doesn't really by into going will have no result. How old are you? My partner is 57 and I am 51.
We haven't had sex in 6 of seven years. Do you want to be me in 5 years?
It is not going to get better. my partner tells me that I still turn him on but nothing still happens and he doesn't even try to initiate ever. He doesnt want to talk about it and he doesnt me to talk to anyone about it. If I initiate it he gets to a point and then he pushes me away delicately because he knows it hurts my feelings how ever he still does it. then I go far away to the other side of the room for the next few days and then the cycle starts all over again. This will continue until I decide I have had enough I guess.
I suspect you are younger than I am and have much more life left to live. If you cannot get him talking about seeing a doctor for some options and secondly talking about the issue at hand to solve it then your partnership is worth nothing! don't kid yourself sex is the glue that holds a couple together when the money runs low and life hits you hard.
so If you cannot get him working on this then choose better next time because trust me you can make the wrong decision again. I went from a mentally abusive man to ED. Do you think I am making better decisions? NOT!View Thread
Billnjenn must be very young as they do not understand what is being talked here.
Yes we all fantasy but we talk about it to our partners at the correct time not when you are supposed to be making your partner feel good about themselves in that moment not telling them all the people that you would want to doing instead of them.
It is normal to have a "holy wood list" of people that you would do if the" lol opportunity ever arrived"" with your partner. It is just a fun way of showing your partner what things in people turns them on. But if he is taking this to your friends then I suspect he may be looking at wanting more out of your relationship like possibly he wants to talk to you about looking at swinging or other things.
An_253712 is suspect you may have children with this guy and I really do not want to be harsh but I have been around the block and I can tell you that you need to have a serious talk with him. This is not normal behavior and you need to know what is going on with him. You will need to be delicate and not confrontational but straight to point as well. I need to find out if this is going to cause him to leave if you don't comply. You need to get it all the on the table so you can see for real what your options are moving forward. Is this going to be a deal breaker or for him (or you) if you do not satisfy his "fantasies/requirements"
And........ what about your needs while you are putting things on the table.
PS> Good couple fantasies are things that are fun and make the intimacy greater not and if one person feels odd or uncomfortable about it is should not be considered.
I agree with Anon. What you need to ask yourself is; 1) Do you not like the entire at of BJ or just the swallowing? 2) The thing you need to understand is why are you doing it? 3) Does he go down on you? especially before you go down on him? this is a major factor because once you are worked up it makes a big difference on the out come.
I can tell you there was a time I my life when I was younger that I didn't like any of it I was jut doing it to make him happy. Then I came into my sexuality. It all changed. I now love sex it is just a dame shame that now I have a partner with ED and doesn't even want to try so solve it now all my sex is with myself.
Be thankful you are not in my situation as it really is not a great place to be and I don't wish this on any one. It is a very depressing life to live.
Again, once he spends the time on getting you fully primed all kinds of things can happen for him. This is what he needs to be aware of.
try this, spend time on just the BJ a few times with no swallowing "after you have been worked up "and just before you come start the BJ and he tells you when he is going to come so you can pull off . This will give you the time to work on the BJ act its self and give you the time to actually enjoy it. Once you get to the point were you are enjoying it and he is still telling you when he is ready to cum one of those times you will most likely take it all and trust me it will not be like any other time when it was forced on you. This will work especially well if he actually goes down on you to get you worked up. Girl once you get in touch with your sexuality it is amazing when you are both in sink with each other. it is like taking your intimacy to the next level and you will both start heading to the bedroom more often.
hope this helps!!! happy easter..............View Thread