Now, *her* having a really good orgasm, that makes my whole week. It's too bad she can't enjoy that. That's a very great quality for a partner to have.
Did you say before if she was sexually abused in the past? I can't recall if it were your case or someone else's. Regardless of the reason for her coldness, if she's not willing to change it, then you'll have to decide how to handle the same ol, same ol. Myself, I wouldn't accept it. This is important to you, understandably, has been an ongoing issue, and you should be assertive with her about how significant it is.
A relationship works well when both parties are willing to put forth the effort that's needed to make it work. And honestly, when the relationship is going smoothly & healthily, I don't think that is a hard thing to do.View Thread
Understandable to see the other issues as more pressing. But, the lack of sex (and IMO, this is symbolic of a lack of intimacy more so) is a very important issue. And one very worthy of going back to counseling for.View Thread
I think for some us, the frustration is because things are not changing as we think is best. I still believe if you listen to your gut, MCK, you will find a lot of your answers and wouldn't question your marriage.
If we didn't care at all, we wouldn't post in approval or disapproval. The situation may also be a trigger for some people, who have been in an abusive relationship or have a loved one in one. When you weren't posting, I feared something happened to you because you were leaving to your sister's. I think this is something a lot of us feared, and with everything you've expressed it's a legitimate fear/possibility. So to hear that you are going to keep giving him chances has some of us feeling like the advice is pointless.
But I hope you don't take that personally or that it discourages you from asking for advice again.
I don't think I ever said it, but congratulations on your graduating! That is a big deal, and you stuck to your guns when you easily could have let it all slip away. You made yourself a priority and I hope your celebration goes well. And be sure to do a little something for yourself also. You deserve it.View Thread
I find it troubling that you are wanting to learn how to settle for no sex and intimacy, instead of resolving the real issues in your relationship. It would be one thing if his libido was uncontrollable, say to a physical reason. But what you are attempting to do is just a temporary "solution." It doesn't get to the heart of the problem and try to make it better.
If you want things to improve then you guys both have to work at it. And if he's not willing to, then that would my cue to exit. I suggest counseling... for you both and if not him, then you. Sex and intimacy are beautiful aspects of a healthy relationship, and you shouldn't have to miss out on that.View Thread
Wow, I forgot all about that too. Sometimes I wonder if this man is truly a sociopath or psychopath. And I don't mean that in an insulting way, I mean that in a truly clinic, psychological way.View Thread