Your the first person i have come across that describes my feelings and the life long misery i have traveled. I haven't had a real bad life, but i am never happy/satisfied. Enjoy very little of anything. Oh yea i am on 3 different depression meds. Have been taking meds since 1995. Felt great for a few months/year?? I thought my troubles were over and meds was the golden answer. It wasn't. I am much better than i was in 1995 today, at least i don't wish for death every night before i go to bed, and was mad when i woke up because i lived. Never had to guts to take my life, but wanted to. Today, i seldom think of death or dying. For that i am thankful. I have trouble making friends, and yes i try. But when your not happy in life no one really wants to be around you a whole lot. I also feel that death will be the only relief, but like i said, just something i do not consider any more. I don't know why i am writing this, not sure who it may help, you or me, or no one. But at least you will know, your not alone in your misery.View Thread