At times I feel like I don't exist and have no purpose in life. Even tho I have family members and friends who love me, I just cant seem to get out of the pit. I claw and claw at the walls, getting no where. This just for myself. But, when it comes to others, I am right there for them talking them up and being their supporter. Giving them words of encouragement and making a point for them to stand up. But, yet I can't do this for myself. I put on a good act of being ok when I really just want to go to sleep and not wake up.
What is my purpose?The two most important people in my life have given up on me and chose not to have me in their lives. And I don't even know why. I have ideas of why. Have appologized and countless times have told them I loved them and nothing will ever change that. They have the right to be mad, but to push me and alienate me. Even from watching them from a distance, from times on need such as funerals. I do as they wish becasue I want them happy I don't want to cause them any grief, so I sacrafice myself for them as any mother would do for their daughters. But it is killing me, its as if I had lost my children in an accident.View Thread
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