When I was at my lowest, I did go to the hospital. It was the last thing I wanted to do, but it was an important step for me. I learned a lot about depression and I received warm, caring support. I was referred to a helpful outpatient program.
However, I was so embarrassed about being depressed. I have really had to work at that. It's a disease, but there is a stigma in our society about mental illness. I had to take a leave of absence from work, and I felt humiliated. However, there were a few people who came to me and told me about their depression or that of someone close to them.
I have had to try many different antidepressants. If you on on a med that makes you feel like a robot, that is not the med for you.
If you feel that you want to hurt yourself, that is the depression talking. If you feel this is all your fault, that is the depression talking. Believe me, I have been there. Being in a support group helped me a lot. The thing that helped me the most was probably "DBT." DBT is a series of classes that help people deal with mental illness. It is like a toolbox of strategies to help you feel better and take the actions that will help you.
I wish you the very best, and I'm sorry you are in the middle of this turmoil. You are not alone.View Thread