anyone else live alone with so few friends you hardly see anyway. these are the people i want to talk to. i have nobody in my life and nothing to meke me keep going. today is especially bad. i manage to keep living, some days i even don't cry. years of this is wearing me down. if i do any kind of physical work, even a little bit, the next day i have energy enough to walk the dog and have coffee. then i lay down for a nap and 6-8 hours i wake up, ready to take nighttime meds and go to sleep. i've got no family like some of you. i did for years and i did what i had to do. i've lost that will now. any single lonely sad people how do you keep going. i do keep going, but these extra long nap days happen at least once or twice a week. i almost think it would be better to just not do any physical work, but that's not even always the cause. sometimes i just have to sleep. i wonder if it's because although i feel like i sleep at night i really don't. i know i wake up a lot, and i'm on a lot of medication. i've read some old posts and i have same complaints as many did/do. besides exhausted, the memory problem is intense. fibro fog is how i spend a good portion of my life. i have social phobia/anxiety so going out there and making more friends isn't the solution. i live in a senior mobile home park and my best friend, i guess, is 87 years old. she has so many physical problems and is in so much pain and just keeps going everyday. she sleeps less than i do and does more than i do. i know we're not supposed to compare ourselves to others, but it's hard when she calls in the middle of a nap wanting me to take her somewhere and i'm too tired to get out of bed much less trust myself to drive i'm so foggy. she doesn't understand any of it. so, back to my opening statement, single lonely people - how to you keep from sleeping all the time.View Thread
thank you missist for much for your encouraging words. sometimes i feel i'm losing my mind with all the weirdness that happens with my body and in my head. i have major depressive disorder for years so i've thought i was losing my mind for quite some time. i have social anxiety and panic attacks. i know how weird this is but i had one in a dream last night and woke up panting and freaking out. i live alone so i have to nurture myself. i don't pray but i have been trying to learn to meditate. i keep saying i'll keep a journal but it usually only lasts 2 days or so. you're right about the envy. i try not to do that. i used to try to keep up but after having a major psychotic break about 20 years ago i don't try anymore. i learned a lot in therapy with the best psychologist in the world. sadly he's in cali and i moved to indiana. i have some family here so some support if i really need it. again, thanks for all your encouraging words.View Thread
sometimes i have the goosebumps, but mostly it's the feeling of bugs crawling and/or biting on my feet and ankles that bothers me most. happens mostly during the swelling times, like right now. i have to look because there could be a bug, you never know. i hate bugs. i've been told it's probably nerve sensations.View Thread
thanks for all who responded to my poll about working. it heartens me to see that the majority do not. the one lady that responded about needing to be around people i understand your need to work. i don't have that need. in fact that's kinda how i lost my job, freaking out around people and machinery. long story no one wants to hear. it's just me and my dog in the senior mobile home park. i will tell you, though, some of these seniors really get me off my oh poor me stool and up and moving around. they are so old with so many physical problems and difficulties moving around. some can't walk without aid of a walker. this is just some. i am 54 and they are 87 so i have good times ahead (just kidding). many of the people are in their 60's and 70's, some still have jobs. i have no desire to work or to talk to people, though i do have a few old people friends. one lady really keeps me positive. she has so many problems and is in such pain with no relief and keeps on going every day. about the chills - i don't know if this is the same but when i'm feeling particularly stiff and swollen i'm often so cold i can't get warm. and it's the middle of summer in indiana here. my really bad days only last a couple of days and then i can get myself moving again. problem often is that i do too much that day and wind up not able to move again, so i really have to keep myself in check. i'm sorry to be babbling so, but i have no one to talk to about this. i have a mom and sister nearby but i don't want to complain about pain around them, they always try to out do me. i have a wonderful internet friend. we met in germany 35 years ago, lost touch and recently found each other again. he's great to talk to, but again, i hate spending my time griping to him either. and i don't want to spend my time griping here either, but i'm new and there's so much i want to know about other people and their problems. when i first swelled up i thought my cankles were going to explode they hurt so bad. i too can't bend my fingers in the morning, and yes a nice hot hot shower does help loosen up those muscles. but then that feeling goes away, but it's enough to get you started. i'm glad i have the dog. without him there are some days i wouldn't even get out of bed and that's not a habit if want to get into. on the bad days i do nap a lot and get 15 or so hours sleep in a 24 hour cycle, but that's just a few days. ok. i should shut up now. i enjoy reading your posts and glad that many of you have just gone on with your life. i have other problems and this is just one more. such is life for some of us.View Thread
i'm feeling terrible today and yesterday, nothing new, but today thought i'd look around about the hands/feet/ankle swelling problem. my feet hurt so bad. in the morning the bottoms are swollen too so i almost fall my way to the bathroom. i was so glad to find this site and see so many other people with the same/similar problems. i have more problems, but today's focus was swelling. i will have some other questions later as other weird unexplainable things have gone on. something like fribro-fog (again, glad not just me). anyway, i won't post much, not a big talker, but i will read everyday. can always find out something new. i had depression/anxiety problems years before fibro, this did not help. i wonder, how many of you still work full or part time jobs. i am currently on disability for despression/anxiety/panic attacks, which are a big problem. like these problems, with fibro i find i am unpredictable and therefore unreliable. i can't imagine holding down a job. i do some volunteer work to get me out of the house, but with volunteer you don't get yelled at if you don't come in that day, or cry all day at your desk, or don't get anything done because you can hardly move. so, that's enough for me for now. i'm really curious how many of you work and what you do and how you do it. thanks for this community.
i see now there's a place for poll questions. i'll ask my work question there.View Thread