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I am a male with Fibro, and I agree that the reason might be that we tend to not go to the doctor or even when we do discuss everything that is wrong.
I would encourage you to get your husband to investigate thing with you. If you both could learn together, I think it will help with the discussions between you both. If he can share what is going on, it might actually strengthen your relationship.
I have all of the usually symptoms and they each come and go a t different times. There are some times that it is all I can do to keep going. But things usually get at least a little better for a period.
Being a male, I would also encourage him to get his testosterone checked, periodically, as well as vitamin D and B levels.
I find the folks on this board pretty upbeat, so that always helps.
Good luck!View Thread

I just want to say that spouses that don't understand is not a strictly male thing. I watched my mother try to come to grips with my fathers MS, and now I watch my wife trying to figure out what to do with me and my FMS.
I am the main income for my family, and my wife's parents rely on us for a place to stay too, so disability is not really an option for me, whether I want and need to or not.
My father has always said that the only pain that is real to someone is their own.
You can never expect anyone to understand what you are going through. If they do, it is a plus, but you can not expect it. The best you can hope for is someone that is patient and that tries to help.
I speak very little to my family, my prior friends, or really anyone else. I do not recommend it. Being a hermit reduces the stress a great deal, but it is also very lonely.
I am 44 now, and have had FMS for 16 years. The only thing I can say for certain is that I keep getting worse and no medications seem to help.
This situation is not going to get any better, so I try o do things when I can. I would agree with earlier posts about suicide and it not being the answer, but I understand the feeling. But by doing so, you let the condition win. I'm just stubborn enough to never let that happen.
I have no words or help or wisdom other than what I have offered, save to no keep up and things will work out in some way. Just keep an open mind that the resolution will most likely not be what you planned, but might still be good.
Luck.View Thread

I don't post much to this group, but try to follow the posts.
I was just curious if anyone else has run into a problem where no medications work?
My last visit to my rhuematologist was silly. I told him how bad I was feeling and that I really didn't want to go on disability. I told him that if he had any suggestions I would take them.
His big, bright idea was to give me medicine to help me sleep better (?). It took about 2 weeks for me to have a bad reaction to that medicine, so I had to stop.
Then I went to my sleep doctor (I have apnea), and his big bright idea was to give me something to help me wake up during the day. He gave me nuvigil (provigil's cousin, I guess). It took 3 weeks to get the insurance to approve, and with taking just one pill, I thought I was going to have a stroke or heart attack. Needless to say I didn't take a second pill.
I have been on Cymbalta (horrible medicine for me), Lyrica, Wellbrutrin, Flexeril, and about 100 other antidepressants and the like. All of which either did nothing, or the side effects were so bad that I had to stop taking them or become disabled just from the medication.
Most of the medicines that i have a reaction to, I have an opposite reaction, it is supposed to make you sleepy so it keeps me awake.
I am now to the point that the doctors are telling me that there is nothing else they can help me with. I have suffered for 16 years, even though it took them 5 years to diagnose me (being a male in his 20s at the time didn't help).
Has anyone else gotten to this point?
Thanks!View Thread

I'm a male with FM, and I can also say that my spouse does not understand. I think that any medical problem that leaves you looking normal is difficult for people to understand. All you can do is be patient with them and remind them. Some days it is very hard.
As far as medicines go, I have tried more than I can count and have not had any luck with any of them.
I agree with Lou about having other issues. I found out that my rashes were because I developed an allergy to the sun in addition to all of my other problems.
Keep at your doctor(s) and don't let them off the hook. If your primary is too big of an A-hole, I would say switch to someone else. If they aren't helping you then what do you have to loose?
Good luck!View Thread

Right now I am in a bad period. My good ones don't come by too much anymore.
Since I am allergic to the sun (and yes the docs supposedly ruled out Lupus), I have to take 4,000 units a day of vitamin D, to just stay above 30 on the scale. My doctors don't worry about your level as long as you stay above that.
Here are my major problems:
Fibromyalgia
Diabetes (thanks to the weight gain)
Low testosterone (level has dropped even though I am using the gel for TRT)
Sun allergy
Migraines
IBS
Shakes
Exercise induced hives
Asthma
Allergies to most antibiotics
fatigue
Depression
Problems with memory and learning
Sleep apnea (I use an APAP machine)
I have tried savella, lyrica, cymbalta (really hated that one), effoxor, and about 50 different anti-depressants. At best they didn't help. Some of them almost put me on disability just from the reactions I had to them.
I am currently taking:
Metformin 250mg (1 a ay)
cyproheptadine (periactin) 4mg (2-3 times a day) to prevent the hives I get from the sun exposure I can't avoid
singular 10 mg (1 a day)
amitriptyline 10 mg (1 a day to limit the headaches and migraines)
Androgel 1.62 (4 pumps a day for the TRT)
Vitamin D 4000 units
Vitamin C 500mg
Whole foods multi-vitamin (1 a day)
Triple omega fish/flax/borage (1 a day)
I also have on hand:
Flexaril 10mg
Triam/HCTZ 37.5/25 mg (for the swelling in my legs)
Zomig 4mg Nasal (If I get a migrane)
For me this is pretty much the minimum I take. You will notice that there is nothing for the pain or directly for the fatigue. The doctors around here will not prescribe anything other than the anti-depressants for those symptoms, so they do not do me any good.
We only have about 6 rhuematologists around my area, and I am on my 4th family doctor. The first one actually told me to never come back (of course he thought it was all in my head).
The rhuematologists that diagnosed me just through some pamphlet at me and said there was nothing he could do for me and to work with my family doctor.
I live in Iowa so there is almost no choice in doctors around here. We seem to get the lower end of the ability scale when it comes to health care.
Thanks everyone for the ideas. I will try and work through this one again, but it does seem to get harder each year.View Thread
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