I hear ya ! Can't believe it's 2 weeks til the big day !
The weather is ridiculous, rain, rain, and more rain and brrrr cold. I did see about 10 flakes of snow on my way to work this morning. At this point, I think snow would be better. We decided to have a cut tree this year, too muddy to get it, so we don't have a tree up yet ! Only a few decorations out.
Usually this is all done by the weekend after Thanksgiving, I just can't get into the spirit this year. It definitely feels more of a chore this year. We all have had colds and flu, I've been having more health issues as well. Honestly, I just want this over with. I don't even have all of my shopping done, nothing is wrapped. I use to be so organized and on top of everything, that's obvioulsy in the past now.
I don't feel like doing anything nor do I have the energy to do it. My sweet husband would do it all if I'd just ask. He doesn't want to step on my toes, he knows how independant I "want" to be. He's just waiting for me to give him the go ahead, bless his heart. He always comes through for me.
Maybe I'll shake the scrooge soon and move on to the happy holidays. Hope everyone can do the same and enjoy this time with their loved ones.
I have tried many different meds and most recently was rx'd Citalapram. Last "antidepressant" was Wellbutrin, which was ok at best for a short period of time. Tell me about the Citalapram as far as what you've experienced. Weight gain ? Do you find that your mood is better or do you just feel better in general ?
I've been dealing with FM for 15 plus yrs and have tried so many antidepressants, ones that are meant to help FM, and so on. I don't sleep, I have pain every day (like everyone), knees, hips, shoulders, neck, ribs, feet, and flare about 3 times a month to the point I feel as if someone has kicked the daylights out of me on top of having the flu from hell. I also get every virus that I come in contact with. With this being said, yes, I am depressed so I need an antidepressant.
I haven't been able to find one that actually helps with the depression so in turn I truly believe that my FM is way worse. Who wouldn't be depressed when dealing with chronic pain and fatigue. I read that Citalapram is a mood enhancer and gives you a feeling of well being. Well, in my view, If I have a feeling of well being then I will feel better. If I feel better then my pain won't be in my face 24/7.
Now that I've gone on and on, can you tell me how it affects you ? I know everyone is different with meds and FM, this isn't my first rodeo, but I haven't talked to anyone that has FM and takes Citalapram. I would greatly appreciate any info that you are willing to share with me.
Thank you so much for your input ! I totally see it in a different way now. She, as well, has never been able to sleep. From the day she was born she's been up and down all night and is probably the reason my sleeping habits got crazy.
Having this knowledge that you shared puts a perspective on things for me now. We need to get to the bottom of this so if it's FM then we can prepare for the future. I never thought of it that way. If I knew what was in store for me I certainly would have done things differently like you mentioned...brilliant ! Why didn't I think of that..wow.
Like Nancy B. mentioned, her Pediatrician needs to know her family history so she knows how to approach this. I will definitely get an appt scheduled.
Great idea Nancy, thank you. As far as the hereditary thing, I think she probably thinks of FM as an "old persons" condition because anyone over 25 is old to a teenager lol but good point.
I hound her about keeping hydrated because of sports and she does well. I think recently she realized why I always tell her to go soak in the tub because she is doing that more on her own. She may be testing me to see if I'll confirm her thoughts of what's going on but it's so hard to tell her because I don't want her to have this to face but its is better to get a grip on things now. Maybe it's something else, I sincerely hope so but to be fair I need to get an appt.
Thank you, Margaret, for your input. I think your right on making an appointment with her pediatrician and having some labs or whatnot. I pray that she doesn't have to deal with this for the rest of her life.
Thank you, MiMi, for taking time to respond. I guess I never thought about the fact that she just hasn't brought this up to me. Maybe she knows I'll make rules about resting more and I'll be on her case since that's what I normally do when she's not feeling well. I should just talk to her about it so we can get a good system down so she knows when to take it easy or whatnot. Perhaps I should make an appointment with her pediatrician.
I hate to put a label on her at such a young age but need to get to the bottom of this. Again, I really appreciate your advice.
I've been dealing with FM for approximately 15 yrs, maybe longer because I was diagnosed when I was young so I think I just coped better but had issues for a while. I was involve in competition dance (tap, jazz, and ballet), gymnastics and played sports. I injured my back a few times and was later told that the ligaments in my body were "stretched out" therefore didn't have the support I needed to keep aches and pains away. MRI/CT and xrays were all normal. Had a horrible labor and delivery with my son and ended up with a fracture pelvic bone, broken tailbone, and wks of physical therapy due to being in stirrups too long. After my daughter was born is when my sleeping issues started and and the aches and pains were more noticeable.
Fast forward to present. My daughter is an athlete and is a mini me. Over the last few yrs she has had complaints of back pain, with huge knots in her back. Had mono a few yrs back and now has issues several times a yr with being wiped out, sleeps as much as she can but is so active she doesn't want to miss anything. She is now complaining of her ribs hurting and has knots on them as well. (One of my FM issues). It's so painful. It goes around to her back, just like mine. She also has knee pain and several other complaints that are similar to one with FM.
I don't want to mention FM to her because she has watched what I go through for as long as she's been alive and this may freak her out. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can handle this without saying the obvious ? She's a junior in high school and I want her to do everything she wants and to enjoy her life before the real world slaps her in the face. Teenagers have enough to deal with so I don't want her to feel "abnormal". She is such a great kid, so understanding of what I deal with but I'm not sure she can handle this. She goes to a career center and is in the Physical Therapy program and is doing so good. Straight A's, perfect attendance, and has had several awards for being a good student. Until she went there this yr, she hated school, grades where not great, and could care less if she was there. She goes when she is wiped out, or not feeling well and I feel horrible for her. I hardly ever miss work and maybe she realizes that she too needs to suck it up sometimes.
I don't want to put too much pressure on her but I also don't want to see her go through this, it breaks my heart. Most days she doesn't get home until 9 or 10 because of sports so it's hard for her to rest the way she should. I stay on her about eating right but again she's a teenager and constantly running. I just don't know what I should do, it's like having your cake and eating it too. She knows a lot about FM because I made her learn about it so she'd have a better understanding of why I can't do everything and why I'm always wiped out and don't feel well. She later did a report on this for Health class, I thought that was sweet but I'm her momma.
I think a trip to the ER might be a good idea. They can do a CT or MRI to assure that there's nothing serious such as a tumor or whatnot is causing this. Certainly, anxiety can cause your body to do some crazy things and the more you sit and worry, the more anxious you become which in return will make symptoms worse. TMJ and grinding your teeth can cause severe headaches/migraines not to mention muscles getting knotted up.
It's strange that they didn't do any type of testing when you were there for your seizure. Obviously, having a seizure is not normal. I've heard that stress/anxiety can be the cause of a seizure (again, I "heard" this) but they still should have done something.
I don't have insurance either but I do know that anxiety meds are not that costly and there's discount cards available everywhere. I found several on line. Is there any type of gov't assistance where you live ? You don't necessarily have to go on medicaid but sometimes they go by your income. Unfortunately, I make slightly more than what they consider to be "poverty". Because I work, it seems to be an issue. Go figure.
If you're that concerned about what's going on, then you really should go get checked out, I would.
Hello again. I'm not trying to be a stalker or anything, I just wanted to check in with you and see how you are doing. I know it's only been a couple of days but I didn't see anything from you. I hope you read what others had to say, it's very helpful, even if it's just to say "I understand". These people here do care and even though we all don't actually know each other, we are all friends.
This is a great place to vent and learn how to cope. FM is such a difficult enemy to face alone so coping skills are highly recommended. There was a book mentioned that has been helpful and I read it when it was recommended to me. Very valuable information. Also, "Living with Fibromyalgia" is a good one as well. Gather as much info as you can, it's very helpful to know what to expect and know that you are not crazy.
There are so many things to know about FM and not two people are the same with what they experience. I realize that you've been dealing with this for many years and so have I (and probably the majority of our friends here) but it's good to gather as much knowledge and support that you can.
You have been on my mind and I worry about you and what your going through. It's not easy. I really hope you have some kind of support system and remember there are a lot of people here that can help you as well. Hearing someone else say what I've said a thousand times put things in perspective for me. It makes me realize how precious life is and how important my family is to me. I'm not saying that WOW ! Life is perfect now ! Or man, I'm pain free, or that I will never feel this way again but it did make me stop and think about how important I AM to my family. They need me no matter how messed up I am lol.
Please remember that you are not alone. I know these are just words from someone that you don't know but I truly do care. It makes me feel better, mentally, to help people and I'm not focused on poor lil 'ol me for a while. It's ok to feel the way you do, It can't be normal not to feel this way at some point in time. For god sakes, your living with chronic pain and trying to raise children and be the perfect mother. Not too many people can raise children let alone do it in the condition your in. Give yourself some credit. You've gone this far and your babies are ok, they will continue to be ok. Nobody is perfect, you're not a failure. The mere fact that you are questioning yourself about being a failure is proof that your not. If you didn't care, this thought would never have crossed your mind. Obviously your children come first so I think your doing a great job
Take the advise of the gal that told us about all the cool things she did with her children while she was in bed. Those are the things that they'll remember. 30 minutes of reading, coloring, doing crafts or watching movies means a lot to kids and you don't have to be up and moving around. Start journals with them or scrapbooking. You can spend hours, several times a week, doing this and think of the memories they'll have. Go to "Pintrest.com", there are endless, cheap craft ideas there. The cool thing is, it definitely takes your mind off of things for a bit and you certainly need that.
Please let us all know how you are doing, we do care. Let us know if we can help in anyway. You can vent or just say "hey".
You are in my thoughts, please take care and keep your chin up. I know how depressing this miserable mystery can be but you can beat it. Laugh at ridiculous things, smile at beautiful things and cry when it's just too much, but never give up. Your babies need you.