Do you think you could work as a nurse if you finished school? I have fibromyalgia and I cannot, and haven't been able to for the last fifteen years. I was a bedside nurse, you may be able to do something else in nursing. I could not. You must be realistic about whatever you decide to do with the rest of your life.
I have lost about 70 pounds, over the last few years. I eat the same, bad food of course. But I have added an hour of exercise a day. I know that is a dreaded word, but I finally found something I really enjoy doing. I have kept track with a chart, so I must write it down daily.
I took a class on living with a chronic condition, and they told me something I had heard before, if you subtract 200 calories a day from your diet and use up 200 calories a day with additional exercise, you will see a difference, slowly but surely. They were right. Slow but sure, I have definitely noticed a difference.
Bras suck, especially underwire ones, I also tend to do without when I am home and wear one when I go out only because I must.
"Dancing with the dragon" is an interesting phrase, it certainly gets the message across. I see dragons as a positive thing, good luck messengers. But I totally understand what she is saying, and that is what language is all about.
No magic answers. No faking it either, let your family in and let them help you. Take the meds you need, do other things like CBT, sit in a hot tub, exercise daily. Try not to concentrate on the symptoms you have. At some point it all clicks and you will find yourself coping quite well.
ONLY complain and whine here online, not with your friends or family. Tell them what they need to know, but do it forthrightly, in a calm voice.
I have also bought the bras you are talking about. It has no wire, and no clips, or hooks. Genie bras, or Ahh, bras seem to be the same thing. I think I got two for $20 at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. I don't recall the brand name. They put the girls front and center, not mashed in like a sport's bra. They are tight putting them on, but then they are hardly noticable. They are great. I have seen them on TV as bras and as chemises. I only have personal experience with the bras.
Everyone is different. WHO told you to file for SSDI? And why are you on such expensive meds?
My four RX meds are all generic, and very cheap, I think I got the notice for June from Medicare, and the total cost of all my meds came to a bit over $600 for 2013 so far. So, an entire year comes to about $1200. I will miss the donut hole again. That thing scares me. I am on a long acting opioid, a short acting one for BT pain, zolpidem for sleep, and gabapentin once a day. I opted to go on methadone as my long acting opioid from a generic of MS Contin because it is very cheap, less than $30 a month. It is fine. The long acting morphine was over $100 per month for total cost.
I was about 48 when I got on SSDI, I still had my husband's health insurance through his job back then. Now he is retired and we both get the old fashioned Medicare A, B, and Part D. He had cataract surgery, and I had breast reduction surgery, it covered both, we paid the deductible and our share of course.
My grandsons are 18 and 6. I did not get to meet the older boy until he was 12, that is when my son married his mom, The younger boy came along shortly later. I do not feel like a burden to them, I have never had to take anything from them. I may need their help in the future, but not yet. I am 62, almost 63 now.
It is far better to stay home that it is to take energy drinks, and diet pills to stay at work. If you can work without them, fine.
The fatigue and insomnia is the hardest part of FMS for me. I can deal with pain, but the all of a sudden fatigue and waking up feeling unrefreshed is awful. I have awakened after sleeping eight hours once in 18 years feeling refreshed, I took the zolpidem that night also.
Enjoy talking with others who have FMS here. I am usually found on the Pain Management Board, and only come here occasionally.
Many therapists will do phone sessions. My old therapist offered one when I could not get into the office and called to cancel an apt.. She said she had a number of clients who got their therapy that way. My MD recommended her, she had a Master's degree and a license.
I am a believer in talk therapy as long as one has goals. I learned CBT and continue it on my own without a therapist. I also take meds from my doctor, belly dance daily, and use a hot tub daily. I really think FMS requires a variety of interventions. I have had FMS for about 18 years now, the only professional help at this time is seeing my primary care doctor four times a year for RXs. FMS is managable, it sucks but it won't kill you.
Please remember that no one really knows what causes FMS, and that community discussion boards include folks who will sympathize with you as they have similar problems. They will tell you what helps them cope. They are not educated necessarily, and are not required to have special training. I think using them for what they provide, and using professionals for what they provide is a good mix.
First thing, close her bedroom door. Then you do not have to look at her mess, and won't feel any need to pick up after her.
Does she pay room and board? She should. Perhaps then you could just use that money to pay a house cleaning service to clean your home. (Not her room though, she can do that herself!!!) Give yourself a break. Even if they only come every other week and do the heavy cleaning, it will really help you a lot.
It sounds like you have spoiled your family somewhat by doing everything for them, now they expect it of you. I don't think she even thinks about helping you, or about you being in pain all the time. I doubt she is a bad person, she is just clueless.