We all read posts differently, I did not take her post the same way you apparently did.
Some people call it Fibro fog, some folks call it Lupus Fog, some blame the fog on other illnesses, I personally found that about 85% of the Fog lifted when I stopped taking certain kinds of antidepressant drugs.
My husband had cancer and was told he was terminal 20 years ago, he found folks on chemo called it Chemo Fog. That said, he did not die. Yahoo!!! Instead of six months, we have had more than 20 years of marriage.
Anon_2912 is correct, it is life, we all have something different that contributes to it in different ways.
I totally agree with you about volunteer work. It is so distracting, I find it really gets my mind off of my pain.
I was the leader of a Camp Fire Girls group after being their leader when they were Blue Birds back in high school/college. My mom volunteered me, none of the moms had the time to do it, they rotated being my assistant, lol. They had "other" things to do. It was great training for me, I did all the paper work as well as planned all the activities, etc. I really think we get as much as volunteers as the kids get from us.
As you balance your time and learn to deal with your illness everything will work out.
I Googled "polygenic FMS" and found a reference to "polygenic" meaning a genetic trait requiring two or more genes like hair color, height, etc., and the supposition that FMS is a polygenic illness OR one of "genetic predisposition".
I believe that before we can call it a polygenic disorder we have to find and identify the two or more genes that are connected with this disorder. I have not so far found any research to confirm this. Have you found this somewhere? If so, please post links for the rest of us.
I have found a lot of places that say a genetic predisposition is present for FMS. This seems to be the accepted way to go for the time being.
You have also found information about the dopamine center of the brain being quieter in FMS folks than other folks causing a thalamo-cortical dysrythmia. Is THIS the problem and FMS is merely one of many symptoms of the problem, or is FMS the main part of the puzzle and the other symptoms are part of FMS?
I will leave all that up to the researchers. At this point, I just get along day by day, fairly well, I think.
I am a RN, and have been around for many years. I remember when it was generally thought that asthma was an emotional problem, kind of like hysteria. The people who do research will find the answers as they go along, slowly but surely.
My husband and I agree most of the time now, it is pretty rare that anyone puts his foot down at this point. Of course, we have hard days and good days. You are right about loving each other, that is surely the most important thing in a marriage.
Good for you doing volunteer work! My late mother did not work "outside" the home, but she did the books for the Boy Scout Troop, had a Blue Birds and then Camp Fire group for my sister, did all the PR work for the Grand Council of the Camp Fire Girls (county level), and always was going out getting petitions signed with the babies in the pram. She set a good example for us five kids.
I have always volunteered, lots of different things, but now I walk dogs at the local animal shelter. Please try not to totally end your volunteer work, but do balance it with your kids and family life.