Grief & Loss Community
Have you lost a loved one? A pet passed away or a lost a job? Grief binds all ... more
See All
Preferences
My Communities
My Discussions
My Email Digests

She was my first dog, I picked her up from the streets when she was about 1 month old. I was still living with my parents then, and when I left home (3 years after), we all agreed it wouldn't be fair to lock her up 14 hours a day alone, while I went to work, so she stayed with my parents. But she was my dog. I visit my parents very often, sometimes several times a week, and she was almays my girl. Her eyes would brighten up when I walked in and she would be on her best behavior, because she always aimed to please. Oh how I miss that girl.
The last years were rough, she had cancer (unoperable) and she fought it well. The first two years, she slimmed out, but was active and herself. The last two she started to slowly fade, except for meal times, where she would be my happy go lucky Evita again.
Unfortunately, I work fair away from my parents, and yesterday at lunch she collapsed and my mom thought it was time to give her eternal rest (we had already decised this before, and I'd been with her the day before yesterday and had said my goodbyes, as she was so weak).
I would have loved to be there in her final moments, but this wasn't possible. My Mom was with her and our vet is also my very best friend, so there was no lack of love in the room.
The thing is, although the tears are springing up while I write this, I'm not that sad. I'm relieved that the next time I go to my parents I won't have to see her frailing body. That I won't have to hear how she almost didn't eat, or vomited after eating. I honestly believe that wherever she is, she better than she was.
My Mom is falling apart, and I just sound cold when I tell her that it was for the best. It even seems to me that I didn't care all that much, which isn't true. But the last two years, that was not my dog anymore. She didn't wag her tail most of the time, and you would never know if she enjoyed the cuddles, as she would ask for them anymore... She lived for food, and that was the only time we would see her in there...
I'm feeling very guilty that I'm not miserable like my Mom...
Death is a strange thing for me. This happened when my Grandpa died too, some years ago. He was sick for a long time too. I just felt relived for all involved...
Am I a bad person?View Thread
See Related Mental Health Communities
Women's Health Newsletter
Find out what women really need.
Other Member Communities
- Dieting Club: 10 - 25 Lbs Member Community Share Your Tips and Support!
- Caregiving Member Community The Support and Understanding You Need!
- Parenting Friends Talking Member Community Get Support from Members Like You!
-
More Related Communities
The opinions expressed in WebMD User-generated content areas like communities, reviews, ratings, or blogs are solely those of the User, who may or may not have medical or scientific training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of WebMD. User-generated content areas are not reviewed by a WebMD physician or any member of the WebMD editorial staff for accuracy, balance, objectivity, or any other reason except for compliance with our Terms and Conditions. Some of these opinions may contain information about treatments or uses of drug products that have not been approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration. WebMD does not endorse any specific product, service, or treatment.
Do not consider WebMD User-generated content as medical advice. Never delay or disregard seeking professional medical advice from your doctor or other qualified healthcare provider because of something you have read on WebMD. You should always speak with your doctor before you start, stop, or change any prescribed part of your care plan or treatment. WebMD understands that reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment from a qualified health care provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or dial 911 immediately.
Health Solutions From Our Sponsors
©2005-2013 WebMD, LLC. All rights reserved.
WebMD does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See additional information.
