OMG>...the dress over your azz. I'm dying here. I can so see that happening thogh. LOL. As for the bra thing....that wouldn't have phased me at all, I'd have turned around and simply said "excuse me, I'm just moving the process along faster for the room!"View Thread
The midway one, she'd already been using a couple fingers.......
So one to the next part of the story. The day they were to meet was arriving quickly and so she'd IM me wanting me to flip on my cam to model different things for the opinion. So she decided to do her own brazilian (her first ever). Didn't bother to tell me she was doing that or I'd have warned her to either go professional or just stick to a bikini and trim. But nope. I get this PANIC'D phone call. "Why aren't you online? Log on. I need you!" I figured it was yet another wardrobe change thing. Ex who knew all about this and had been highly amused with her antics all week was there. So I log on, cam request comes up, I accept and guess what I am looking at? Not clothing. But her you know what up close and personal. Ex standing behind me going "WTF did she do to it?" I could tell she'd obviously just waxed it from the inflammation and the screaming telltale redness, but right smack above was a wicked nasty redness. She's screaming at me through the phone the whole time, "What do I do? OMG, what do I do?" I'd had one previously 1 time professionally and there is NO WAY I'd ever attempt it again, let alone do it myself. So I inform her ex is having a view and close it. Ask her if the wax was too hot. No. Did it burn her (skin irritation)? No. Then she announces she waxed over the same place twice. She is hysterically crying because she is convinced this guy is going to think she had some disease. I'm doing my very best not to laugh and failing miserably at it. He was on my IM list, so I just took care of the issue for her. Explained she did the wax herself and what had happened and could he please please please just ignore it. That's what happened. He pretended it wasn't there until SHE brought it up in this long convoluted explanation ending with "and Melly's hubby saw it" and burst into tears.
My bestest gf in the whole world was with this guy who was really into back doors, if you know what I mean. HAHA Anyways, she was really stressed about this whole back door thing. She was on the internet searching. She ordered a book about it teaching her how to tilt her body and relax and all that other stuff. I was dying about her stress. It cracked me up soooooo much, especially since it was an online thing but they were planning to meet in person in the spring. I think it was Sept or so when she was going through all of this stress about her back door. We usually exhanged gifts for bdays and the holidays (her's is late Nov, mine dec) so we'd each get the other 1 thing. I decided that year I was going to toss in something for her dad (who's like a 2nd dad to me) and her daughter. I sent her the usual wrapped bed bath and beyond stuff she loved and then sent a medium sized "plug". All were wrapped individually. But on the "plug" I had written in huge contrasting marker "DO NOT OPEN IN FRONT OF ANYONE" all over the box. So she gets the box and in her glee hands them all out thinking I sent her a bday and holdiday gift. She was so excited. Everyone opens their stuff and they're happy. Dad got his flannel shirt, her daughter an anime how to draw set and bf got her bath stuff. She says she was thinking "oh poop, now I have to buy another gift" and didn't bother to read the writing ALL OVER EVERY SIDE OF THE WRAPPED box and unwrapped it then and there. She was so embarassed. I am such a wicked evil friend. And when she complained to me, I kept going....HOW could you not miss it? I wrote it all over the box. She still says she doesn't know and denies I ever did write it there.
I have sooooo many more stories to tell....rofl. Thank you though...I so needed the small giggle today.
And OMG....they stole your buzzer!!! That's just freaky weird.View Thread
Hmmm...do I really reveal the "dirty stuff" or stick to the mundane everyday stuff.....?
Okie dokie....here we go. More shocking stuff about Melly.
1. I had a lovely get together several months after my divorce. Everyone had gone, except the one guy I had just started to seriously date. I owned quite a little collection of "marital aids." We'd held off on the spending the night thing while the kids were there until we were pretty sure it was going to be a permanent thing. No big deal. But during the party I parked my kids in my bedroom to watch their favorite movies. It had only been a couple of hours at most. So when it's all said and done, bf and I decided it was time to let the kids know we were serious and going to take the next step with him staying over with them there (ex had already done this with his now ex-wife). They were fine. Off to bed they went. We finished cleaning up and went in to go to bed. All over the floor were scattered a drawer full of marital aids. Bf knew all about them, so I was ok. Gathered them up, but one was missing. I looked EVERYWHERE. Next morning it was inquisition time. DS1 points to DS2 and blames him. Other than the color, there was no doubt as to what it resembled. So he trots off to their room, retrieves it and marches out to me with bf sitting beside me it buzzing away against his neck. Needless to say my box of toys got put into a better place because he'd snuck it into their room during the get together. I am SURE someone had to have noticed or at least heard the other ones buzzing away on the floor. LOL
2. Ok. Y'all know I had my crazy BDSM days and private club play did require nudity. The owner, who we both enjoyed playing (no sex, just the play part of it) had just finished giving all these 20 yr olds a demo on suspension and rope play. They'd all kept their underwear on. So when he was done, he drug out the toys and I stripped completely. This gasp goes up because now these girls are ditching and dodging for clothes to hide while I stood completely naked watching as he tied me up to a suspension rigging so I could run in circles. I was so embarrassed but had a good laugh about it cause none of them ever came back.
Sweetie....maybe you need some time apart. Even if it's just a weekend away with just you to lounge in a long bath, read a recreational book, and movie time. I'm worried about you. All this is driving you nuts and that is so not a good thing. Yes, he needs to earn your trust back. But at the same time, that's never going to happen if you don't let go and move forward. I've been there. It hurts. You either forgive, work on things or move on. I can tell you, you will never ever forget. Not that you should.
And Androids are all about touch screen and apps. They work very similar to iPhones. But let the phone be. He already knows you're looking at it.
I have done the write and burn thing. It takes a lot of inner strength to let things go. And I know you have it. For me, the trick in the burning is to think of all the things that are pissing me off or hurting me and imagine them going up in flames and going away. I feel so better after but it took a few tries of doing this before it helped. So stick to it if you're going to use that technique.
Another suggested technique was the rubber band around my wrist. Whenever I would get angry, I snapped the band around my wrist. It's supposed to distract you from the anger which is external to something more internal (the pain).
Another thing I would suggest, and I am sure tons of people will disagree with me, but stop looking and investigating. You know it's happened. You know in a way it is continuing. But I think the details are sending you off to a not so good place. You need to concentrate on you first, the relationship second, and your husband last. Make you well. That's very important.
Looks at cookster dead serious....quality meaning high quality leather and construction. I am partial to a really good heavy suede....oh nevermind. And a good cotton twisted rope is much better than the bondage rope they sell.
And yeah, I fully admit to being a perv. Stamps my forehead. LOLView Thread
I think the battery question is standard for a few reasons. 1) They're needed to make the product work (unless you went with an electric version) and some people forget them. 2) They offer to install them to verify the product works properly because they are non-returnable items. LOL As for the rest of his behaviors, they ring this stuff up day in day out. It's kind of like the grocery store cashier ringing up a new product (ie. cookies) and commenting that she tried them last week and they were great.
I can say from experience that the more you are in and out of these places, the less embarrassed you are at the register. But you are so cute!!! LOLView Thread