... I know the feeling - in fact I've discovered that elbows and knees can flap too, sigh.
Any ideas for trimming up that don't involve walking, running or aerobics (they're now out of my league) ... oh, and that don't involve giving up food (a passion of mine)? I noticed WebMd had a 'Diet Exchange'. I nearly popped in there ... but lost all courage.
Incidentally, remember the thieves I mentioned who came into my closet and shrank all my clothes? Well, those impish little critters have gone and visited every clothes store in the land and sewn in stupidly incorrect labels! CarolView Thread
BUT, if nobody believes my alternative tale of woe about the surreptitious replacement of my body parts, I'm taking up the channelled by dead relatives option. It may even seem more credible View Thread
....I wish I was so witty! I'm not sure which one I laughed at more The one I posted above arrived in my e-mail this morning from a friend - I'd been sharing the woes of gravity with her a couple of days ago. I laughed out loud ... but your's has really sparked my imagination. No wonder you're a writer. I'm still giggling as I write.
Some of you may have already been warned of this.....
You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.
My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago.. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine?
I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs.
Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans. And then the thieves struck again.
My bum was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new bum was attached at least three inches lower than my original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favour of long skirts.
Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was drying my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time.
What could they do to me next?
When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story. Women of the world wake up and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic ' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts -stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has something 'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?
THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere every night.
WARN YOUR FRIENDS!
P.S. Last week I thought some one had stolen my Boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.
Thought this was too 'important' not to pass on. Have a wonderful day - with a joy filled heart.
P.P.S. - These same thieves came into my closet and shrank my clothes! How do they do it????
Just thought you should know. Have a fun day if you can, best wishes to you all, CarolView Thread