I hope your post doesn't get missed by others who can offer you their understanding and support.
No, please don't give up but do keep talking here and make finding real support your mission there. It's hard enough being in pain, nevermind when you're alone a lot of the time and away from all who could support you.
If you have any friends and family anywhere in the world who care about you, let them know you need help. They may be able to help financially so you can get the treatment you need.
Even talking here may help. And tell your doctor what you're feeling.
Please keep us updated on how you're doing. (((softhugs))) Your son is never going to stop needing you in his life, no matter how old he gets - and this is true with or without Autism being part of the picture.View Thread
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. ~Joseph Campbell