Hm. I don't think this is deadly but probably not very effective. I
I do believe kids should have consequences for undesirable behavior. This sounds like it has been tried and frankly, is a bit old school (picturing the movie "A Christmas Story" here) . . . and it is not working.
What else COULD work? Well, I'm a firm believer that my kids will learn to respect me because I am the keeper of all things they like in our household. I am the one that takes them places, allows them to do things they like, helps them out with whatever they need, etc. They SHOULD respect me. Keep drilling that in to her head.
She is young, I think that I'd work on positive reinforcement. It is amazing the results this can get. A simple 'I will not respond ot you until you use nice words and a nice voice to talk to me." And then ignore her until she does. And when she DOES use the nice words, praise her like she is a rock star.
Hi there. Well, I will say that kindergarten and first grade are notoriously difficult transitional years for some kids. The goal is to always remain really upbeat and positive about it. Talk about the good things> you get to see your friends, you get to do cool art, you get to ride the bus, you get to have recess, you get to check out a library book, you get to do gym, etc. (whatever they've told you is good). Play up the good things big time.
My kids were both really tired when they started full day school in the first grade (both were 6 when they started first grade). I found that by making their bed time 15 minutes to a half hour earier, it really helped.
Some kids that go straight into full day kindergarten struggle a bit and that is why many districts still offer a half day program. If there is one available in your district, you could always consider this and switch to it if it isn't too difficult to do.
But the vast vast majority of kids will adjust and acclimate to school and find things they enjoy about it. One other area to look into is if anything is hard for him. For example, if he has trouble with handwriting---- school can feel daunting to a child. A little extra work at home on handwriting can make a difference in the comfort level at school. So look for any root causes as well.
Hi there. Well, for some kids, they do not naturally develop strong social skills and their parents and caregivers have to teach them to help them along.
She sounds a little immature for 8 but then again, as the mother of an 8 year old, they are still young and there is a wide range of 'normal' behavior. I do think though that you could help direct her with things like personal space.
As her aunt, it would be good to know if her mom feels as you do. That is the starting point. Have a heart to heart with mom with no judgement but just care and concern. And try to have some suggestions for her.
Here is an idea for personal space illustration. Get a hoola hoop and have her put it around herself. Then . . . try to get in with her. She'll laugh as it is obviously too close. so, she must picture that people have hoola hoops around them as their personal space. If she gets too close, it is like trying to get in their hoola hoop. People often call this a bubble as well. Bubbles touch but do not go further or they will pop. Another idea is robot arms. Stick arms out and walk like a robot. Then have her do the same and walk to her -- your arms will bump. We should always be robot arms apart from one another.
Another issue that she may have is reading facial cues. Putting feet on someone may be annoying to that person. How can she tell if they think it is funny or annoying? Help her with this by practicing facial expressions. You can play a game of making them and have her guess what emotion you are pretending to have.
These types of games will help her understand the dynamics of other people for the situation you describe.
As to what she plays, that is tough. Kids are at all levels of imaginative play at that age. I try to incorporate 'main stream' things like what I notice other kids my child's age are into while letting them do what ever comes to their own mind. So they can 'talk the talk' with their peers but still be a horse galloping across the yard. She's 8 and being goofy sometimes is part of that I think. As long as she can then fit in when she wants to as well because she is introduced to things and 'coached', she'll be fine. good luckView Thread
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