Challenging children take their toll on parents, family life, school, and sadly their world is chaos too.
Your young daughter needs to be seen by a professional, someone who specializes in children. A good professional is skilled in how to work with a child and can not be fooled.
I highly suggest you look into Ross Greene's approach. He is amazing at working with challenging youth. He has books, and a great website. I will paste the link for you. http://www.livesinthebalance.org/
I highly, highly suggest you looking into this wonderful online organization:
http://www.thebalancedmind.org/ They have a specific group for young children called "very young". At the top of the page click on "connect", then when the drop down menu appears, hit "online support communities".
I joined back when my youngest daughter was 7, and acted very much the same way as your son. The parents have been my biggest education and source for support and guidance.
Children often times can hold it together during a school day, then when they get home in the comfort of those they love, let loose.
Has your daughter always been a bit difficult, or is this behavior somewhat new? My youngest daughter was always challenging, but my 3rd daughter had a shift once she hit puberty. Estrogen dramatically increases during puberty and may contribute to depression / mood issues. Here is a good link about teens and depression: http://www.helpguide.org/articles/depression/teen-depression-signs-help.htm
You may want to have an evaluation done by a professional if your home-life has turned into a battle ground, and you guys are having a hard time 'enjoying' your daughter.
I understand how hard this is, and believe me, you're not alone. Take care! -KathleenView Thread