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Weaning off Prozac

My son is 16 years old had a breakdown due to pressures at school, he was diagnosed as having Catatonia and...

Posted by An_251858

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Weaning off Prozac My son is 16 years old had a breakdown due to pressures at school, he was diagnosed as having Catatonia and...

Coconut oil for babies eczema

I read that coconut oil was good to use for many things, especially on the skin. And if used along with...

Posted by lagartija

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Coconut oil for babies eczema I read that coconut oil was good to use for many things, especially on the skin. And if used along with...

Immunization documentation for school

First off a little backround - I am a nurse and was a peds nurse for 6 years. I have changed fields in...

Posted by SpartanAnnie

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Immunization documentation for school First off a little backround - I am a nurse and was a peds nurse for 6 years. I have changed fields in...

Parenting Casting - New Docu-Series

Web Posting What's your parenting style? You could be featured on a new cable series. Are you an attachment...

Posted by pithprod

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Parenting Casting - New Docu-Series Web Posting What's your parenting style? You could be featured on a new cable series. Are you an attachment...

Mommy love?

Hello, I used to actively participate in the pregnancy group and now my daughter is 13 months old. When my...

Posted by An_249385

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Mommy love? Hello, I used to actively participate in the pregnancy group and now my daughter is 13 months old. When my...

Don't know what to do :0/

Well lets see. 5 yrs ago my husband and I took in our 3 nephews plus brother-in-law. My sister had decided...

Posted by lagartija

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Don't know what to do :0/ Well lets see. 5 yrs ago my husband and I took in our 3 nephews plus brother-in-law. My sister had decided...

Please help with some advise...

Please don't bash me... I will answer any questions anyone has regarding ANYTHING I AM JUST overloaded!I'm...

Posted by An_247074

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Please help with some advise... Please don't bash me... I will answer any questions anyone has regarding ANYTHING I AM JUST overloaded!I'm...

Problems with adult son...help

Ok, there is 21 years of history so, as Mom, I know all the dynamics and most people just offer up a quick "do...

Posted by Pppaige

Ok, there is 21 years of history so, as Mom, I know all the dynamics and most people just offer up a quick "do this" or "do that". I have kind of turned a deaf ear to those close to the situation because they are as upset as I, but again, as Mom, I am allowing, errr enabling, or whatever because he is my son.

Here's the situation. 21 y/o on 8/27. I raised him from birth to 15, then he moved in with his dad who was pretty much absent all that time. Dad was career military with rotating tours to middle east, so step mom was adult in charge 50-75% of the time. A year later, moved back with me, but at this point he was used to no rules and running with the wrong crowd. Lasted a year with me, then back with his dad his senior year in high school. He got into criminal trouble (arson- burned down a porta potty at a community park while with a group of teens). I handled that legal dilemma by arranging for restitution, community service and apology letters. Then, he served 2 years in the USAF, but got an underage consumption and was offered an early out. He took it. Spent the last year since military discharge living first with his dad, who kicked him out, then with "friends" who ultimately gave him a deadline day to be out. During this year he worked as a cook in the town restaurant and did CNC machining, but quit both jobs not long ago to sit in his "room" (which I discovered was 1/2 of a single car garage with no heat or a/c) and smoke pot 24/7. Jobless for a month, expired car registration, no money and 40 lbs lighter due to lack of food, he sent me a text message 48 hours prior to his move out date saying goodbye, that he was calling it quits. He attempted suicide and failed....I found out the next day.

The day after that I drove 2 hours to his "room" he lived in, drove him 25 miles to the BMV to get 30 day tags on his car, and he followed me to my home and moved in. Since then, a month and a half ago, he is now on his 3rd week at a local fast food restaurant, and loves it. I have paid a lot of money keeping gas in his car, buying loose tobacco and rollers (cheaper than cigarettes), new clothes (as his were ratty and stunk), providing a roof over his head and food in his stomach. Not to mention a washer and dryer, hot shower and TV.

In return, $5 went missing from my purse a week ago, my daughter had $1 go missing today and he hasn't done his own dishes or laundry since he's been here. I found out he received 2 small paychecks (1 was from orientation at his current job and 1 from orientation at a temp assignment prior). I found out he cashed both, didn't tell me and spent the oney. The deal was, I was to handle his finances 100% because he has no car insurance, about 6 collections agencies after him and other financial responsibilities. I have devised a budget that started with his first full 2 week check yesterday, where he gets gas money, a small, personal allowance and the rest goes to bills or savings. He took his personal allowance yesterday and bought a drug detox kit and "pipe". Upon finding those in his car, I made him leave to his one and only "friend's" house to get out of my sight.

My problem is this: everyone says kick him out. I know just 6 weeks ago he attempted suicide due to the very same situation he will be in should I kick him out. He is working. But, I am sure he is smoking pot with his friend and is adamant that all my job is, is to manage his money and let him do what he wants as long as he is working. He says he's 20 and is acting no different than any other 20 year old and I am blowing things out of proportion. I have a 16 year old daughter witnessing all this who says....kick him out. The nearest homeless shelter is in the inner city 15 miles away and isn't a good environment. He has no one else to turn to. No one.

Think about it please. It's easy to say "kick him out", but is that the only option?View Thread

Posted by Pppaige

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Problems with adult son...help Ok, there is 21 years of history so, as Mom, I know all the dynamics and most people just offer up a quick "do...

Change in Behavior

Hello everyone..I am looking for a little advice. My son is 6 years old and has never had any difficulty...

Posted by Zachsmom31

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Change in Behavior Hello everyone..I am looking for a little advice. My son is 6 years old and has never had any difficulty...

9 yr old refuses to go to bathroom at night

what can I do, my son refuses to go the bathroom at night, even if I set alarms to go off several times a...

Posted by gdjackie

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:9 yr old refuses to go to bathroom at night what can I do, my son refuses to go the bathroom at night, even if I set alarms to go off several times a...

Help, please....I just want to cry!!!!

My anxiety is horrible right now, and I am hoping this might be the place for some advice. I never...

Posted by UTMomofTwo

My anxiety is horrible right now, and I am hoping this might be the place for some advice.

I never suffered from anxiety until I got married. It wasn't that bad until I had children. When my youngest turned 3, I realized it was not going away, so I started taking Cymbalta. I have been doing really well on it. Possibly too well because it has helped me to avoid issues I should have been dealing with.

My husband of almost 12 years is a control freak. He has to control everyone and everything around him. He also has OCD about every mess other than his own. I never noticed any of this until we had children (those cute little people who make messes). He hovers over the children making sure they do things "right" and points out when they are about to do something that he feels is the "incorrect" or "inefficient" way of doing it. He whines and yells at the kids. When they spill WATER he gets upset with them. He stares at the children during dinner to jump on them should their elbow be close to a cup that could get knocked over, if they aren't sitting in their seats properly, if they are about to spill food, etc. He often belittles the kids and I, but I really don't believe he does it consciously. I do ALL the cooking, washing of pots, pans and anything that won't fit in the dishwasher, laundry, cleaning up after the kids, getting the kids ready for anything and everything, including bed. He mows the lawn and loads/unloads the dishwasher (which I am grateful for). I have listed the negatives above, but he is also a kind man, has fun playing with the kids occassionally is a good person at heart.

We have been to counseling. He has tried anti-anxiety meds. Everyone has told him that even though he believes to his core that what he thinks and feels is RIGHT, he is actually more extreme about how he handles things. None of this has helped. He might be kinder and more patient for a day or so, but then he goes back to being super inpatient, which leads to expressions of anger and frustration. He has never been physically abusive with anyone.

Then there is my 9 year old son. He is a gifted underachiever. He tested with a 142 IQ. He hates school, hates math and struggles with all of it. He is bored and doesn't learn what he should because he isn't interested. He does well enough to maintain good grades, but I know he can do better. I think he just doesn't believe in himself and I know his self-esteem is shot. Take a very smart kid and a father who is constantly telling him how to do everything and you have a disaster. I am proud of my son for standing up for himself when his father is telling him what to do and not listening, but it isn't good when he is talks/yells back. They can't be in the same room for more than 30 minutes without fighting. My son has had trouble at school since the day he started going. He picks on the other kids. He has a HUGE impulsive streak, but that is the only aspect of ADHD that he has (meds didn't change anything). This impulsivity gets him in trouble at school on a fairly regular basis because when someone makes him mad, he lashes out.

I believe my son's problems and insecurities come from the way his father treats him. I can't keep watching as my husband gets angry and impatient with the kids. I feel like we should get a divorce. I know he feels that we are "his life" and he doesn't know what he would do without us, but nobody is happy at home!

...............More in a reply because I couldn't post it all here................

View Thread

Posted by UTMomofTwo

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Help, please....I just want to cry!!!! My anxiety is horrible right now, and I am hoping this might be the place for some advice. I never...

Need Advice........

I need a little advice. But, first here a little back ground been married to a wonderful man for 11 yrs we...

Posted by frances03

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Need Advice........ I need a little advice. But, first here a little back ground been married to a wonderful man for 11 yrs we...

Is it normal for my son to play with the Monster D...

I have an eight year old son who just loves to play with those new Monster High Dolls . I mean he never did...

Posted by jmalevic

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Is it normal for my son to play with the Monster Dolls? I have an eight year old son who just loves to play with those new Monster High Dolls . I mean he never did...

An unusual question, perhaps...

Hi Been trying to conceive for about 2 years now; am in my early 40's and DH in his mid 50's, so, it isn't...

Posted by faith11s

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:An unusual question, perhaps... Hi Been trying to conceive for about 2 years now; am in my early 40's and DH in his mid 50's, so, it isn't...

Divorce and parenting

My DD's father and I are divorced. Have been for 2.5 yrs now, and everything seems fine, until lately. We...

Posted by An_239690

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Divorce and parenting My DD's father and I are divorced. Have been for 2.5 yrs now, and everything seems fine, until lately. We...

parent frustration

is anyone else soo frustrated with an adult child that won't grow up? I have 26 year old daughter that has...

Posted by Anon_233411

10 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:parent frustration is anyone else soo frustrated with an adult child that won't grow up? I have 26 year old daughter that has...

Odd ?

...My name is Chrissy, and im not sure it this is even relevent... I recently just had my 2nd DD. Well, i...

Posted by SkysMama09

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Odd ? ...My name is Chrissy, and im not sure it this is even relevent... I recently just had my 2nd DD. Well, i...

Reminder: Reporting Posts

Hello community, If you feel a post violates WebMD's TOU please use the "Report" icon located...

Posted by Lainey_WebMD_Staff

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Reminder: Reporting Posts Hello community, If you feel a post violates WebMD's TOU please use the "Report" icon located...

Mother Debating DH About Circumcision!

Hello parents, Circumcision is always a hot topic on WebMD. I thought you might like to check out...

Posted by Lainey_WebMD_Staff

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Mother Debating DH About Circumcision! Hello parents, Circumcision is always a hot topic on WebMD. I thought you might like to check out...

Dr. Altmann Asks:Are you modeling good social skil...

Hello parents! Our guest expert, Dr. Altmann asks: "From your own family experiences, do you...

Posted by Lainey_WebMD_Staff

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Dr. Altmann Asks:Are you modeling good social skills? Hello parents! Our guest expert, Dr. Altmann asks: "From your own family experiences, do you...

Step-Parenting Question

Let me start out by saying that I love my wife. She is the kind of woman that I can wake up to everyday and...

Posted by JustSomeDad

Let me start out by saying that I love my wife. She is the kind of woman that I can wake up to everyday and be amazed at my good fortune. In eight years of marriage we have had only one major "fight" and maybe two minor disagreements. We are best friends and get along like few couples I know.

I should also say that I am a peace keeper to a fault. I am terrible at confrontation. I have a very long fuse and sometimes I let things fester too long before stepping up and dealing with them. My friends consider me laid back - I consider myself a little slow

With disclaimers out of the way, I do have an issue that I would be extremely grateful if someone could give me insight.

We have four kids who do not live with us. She has a 29-year-old son, I have a 22-year-old daughter, and two sons, 16 and 13. And basically she treats them very unequal.

An example would be (and there are lots) cleanliness. When her son visits, his "stuff" goes into a chair in the dining room - and no matter how long he stays it sits right there in a pile. He doesn't shower and sleeps in his dirty clothes on the couch (even after doing some yard work we hired him to do). He is admittedly an alcoholic, but I have always considered him a good kid and a friend.

But when my kids visit, if one thing is out of place (i.e. not put away neatly in the guest room) she notices and makes it a point to mention it. I can't help but think that she actually looks for things to complain about when they are here.

On their last visit, on their first day, a single sock was left on the stairs. Before saying hello to me, she noticed the sock, pointed it out, and so started the visit.

I could give example after example, but I don't want to make her look bad with only one side of the story. She is in every way a beautiful, perfect woman, but my fuse is burning short on this issue and I have no idea how to deal with it. I walk on eggshells when they are here and do everything that I can to make sure everything is perfect when she comes home.

But this morning, when I pulled out a skillet to make breakfast, I mentioned that it was still dirty (our dishwasher is getting old and probably needs a good cleaning). Immediately she blamed my daughter who is living with us now. But I know it was a pan that I used, that I washed, that I put away. I explained this to her, but it was still very revealing.

I am not angry with her (yet) and I want to keep it that way. I am hoping that someone can offer some advice on how I can help things be more equitable.

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this.

Just Some DadView Thread

Posted by JustSomeDad

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Step-Parenting Question Let me start out by saying that I love my wife. She is the kind of woman that I can wake up to everyday and...

Emotional Stress and Divorce

Hi parents Divorce can be very emotional for our children. At times, a child will blame themselves...

Posted by Lainey_WebMD_Staff

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Emotional Stress and Divorce Hi parents Divorce can be very emotional for our children. At times, a child will blame themselves...

Roll Call!

Hi parents, I miss you all and wonder where you all hiding? Please update the community!

Posted by Lainey_WebMD_Staff

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Roll Call! Hi parents, I miss you all and wonder where you all hiding? Please update the community!

Did anyone "choose" their babies gender?

Good Morning! My DH and I have two beautiful daughters that we love more than anything. We are starting to...

Posted by laura_allen

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Did anyone "choose" their babies gender? Good Morning! My DH and I have two beautiful daughters that we love more than anything. We are starting to...

Tracking Events and Milestones in Life?

Hey there members! We're compiling a list of all the events and milestones that our members...

Posted by Lainey_WebMD_Staff

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Tracking Events and Milestones in Life? Hey there members! We're compiling a list of all the events and milestones that our members...

Dr. Altmann Asks: "At what age do you think a chil...

Hello parents! Our Parenting guest expert, Dr. Altmann has a new discussion: When is your child...

Posted by Lainey_WebMD_Staff

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Dr. Altmann Asks: "At what age do you think a child can be left home alone?" Hello parents! Our Parenting guest expert, Dr. Altmann has a new discussion: When is your child...

How Do You Ensure Healthy Eating Habits in Your Ho...

Hello parents! The best way to begin a healthy life style with your children is to begin right...

Posted by Lainey_WebMD_Staff

0 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:How Do You Ensure Healthy Eating Habits in Your Home? Hello parents! The best way to begin a healthy life style with your children is to begin right...

I am new to this board and just wanted to ask opin...

Ok so I have 4 children and I am pregnant with #5. One of my children has down syndrome and at 4 is still non...

Posted by An_221789

Take the Poll

Do you think sign language is a good thing or a bad thing to be teaching young babies? And why?

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:I am new to this board and just wanted to ask opinons Ok so I have 4 children and I am pregnant with #5. One of my children has down syndrome and at 4 is still non...

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