I am a mom who has 4-daughters. 2-of my daughters have depression, so I believe I understand a bit of your feelings. My girls have a hard time expressing their thoughts to me too - I am not a professional, but their mom (well, sometimes I like to think I'm a "Professional Mom"...LOL)
Anyway, I think talking to someone outside your family might be a good start. What about a school counselor, or someone from your church? or a close family friend ? Do you have a friend who's parent you connect with, or an Aunt or Uncle?
There are some good people who do care and will listen to you. I'm sure your parents love you, but don't quite know how to connect on the level you need right now.
If there is no one you can think of to talk to, then please call the crisis / suicide hotline link I pasted. Some there will help and give you a starting point.
I'm glad you wrote sweetie, write back anytime, ok? (((((Hugs)))) -KathleenView Thread
I think you are right to be concerned, and good for you for being such an attentive mom!
Between the ages of 10 and 14, it is not unusual for depressive symptoms to begin to show in those pre-disposed to depression/mental health issues. This happened to my daughter at age 11. I was not as wise as I am today - because I should have sought out help sooner rather than later.
The Counselor's comment didn't sit well with me, because IMHO, a good Child Psychologist teaches a child how to implement coping tools when they become overwhelmed and stressed. Obviously your daughter is needing some tools now because of how you describe her acting.
Sleep is huge - for everyone, but especially teens. Is your daughter going to bed at a decent hour, but just can't sleep? Does she have a fairly "typical" bedtime routine? If she truly just-can't-sleep, then I would bring this up to the Psychologist. And yes, I think it would be a really good idea to find a smart, qualified Child Psychologist (preferably female) to see your daughter. I would talk to her pedi, and do some research and find a Dr. you like and feel comfortable with.
I always found it helpful to first go in myself "interview" to prospective Dr. and tell them about the changes / difficulties your daughter is having...........then, if all goes well, bring in your daughter for a visit.
I hope this helps some? I know how painful it is to watch your child suffer. Take care!!! -KathleenView Thread
Has your son had this frank of a conversation with his Dad yet? Maybe his father could shed some insight on sexual feelings and curiosity from a Male's perspective?
I know this age is tricky and there are a lot of sexual ideas, fantasy's and curiosity regardless if your son is gay or not.
I would monitor his computer though, there are a lot of inappropriate sites and material out there that fuels (not in a good way) a young person's ideas and thoughts. - Just an idea, maybe you do this already !
IMHO, a person who lies often, has some underlying issues....trying to tease out why, or what is motivating this behavior would most likely take a professional - either a Child Psychologist, or Adolescent Psychiatrist.
*I am sorry* You have a very, very difficult situation and you need some professionals on your team to help and guide you.
So, what does his pedi say about all this??? What is the therapist he sees say? Is the therapist a Child Psychologist?
IMHO, you need a smart, skilled, board certified Child Psychiatrist to evaluate your son also - besides the neuro.
You mention the lack of community support - this may be true depending where you live. If you write back with your city/state of residence I will do my best to send you some links of organizations that may be helpful / support to you.