To be honest if i were you, I'd stick with your fiance. I mean you are engaged and having a baby for a reason right? You love each other and want to spend your future together right?
It sounds like your parents were quite controlling growing up, and still have that control over you. I know you dont want to ruin the relationship with your parents, but really they can't expect you to choose them over growing up and being with your baby and his or her daddy! They need to let go of the control.
So what do you do? Only you know the answer, but if it were me, i'd ask my fiance to move out together, make a start on your own. I mean you know you have a place to go if your parents wont have you there (although very crowded and dirty). It is hard when financially things are tight, but maybe your fiance and you need to bite the bullet and try find a nice little place for yourself. It doesnt have to be somewhere you have to stay for a long time, but can at least give you some breathing space. It will be a given that your parents may be upset, but hopefully they will come around. What they are asking you to choose between (him or them) is just wrong! Good luck with itView Thread
HI, I agree with Stacey too! And the thing to remember is that while you are sitting there, thinking about him and wanting him, he has clearly moved on and is definitely not thinking about you in return.
I know exactly how you feel. Went out with a nasty guy who cheated, and yet I still managed to have feelings for him. I knew he was all wrong for me, but i shook and carried on, everytime i saw him. When i went home I used to imagine that he had changed his mind and would turn up at my house wanting me too. The feelings were so nice, but also sad and I knew they werent real. It took time but I got over it. I also met my Mr Right by moving on and enjoying life, and now married I realise you do move on and will find someone SO much better eventually!!View Thread
Personally if it were me, I'd continue to support her and be there for her.
Unfortunately at the end of the day it is her choice whether she remains with this guy or not. Which understandably is hard for you to see, especially when you know she (and your grandchild) need so much more than what this man can give them. You can only continue to be there for her, and one day she may just have enough and leave and at least you will be there waiting for her to run to...the worst thing that can happen is one day she is severely hurt (emotionally or physically) and ends up with no one to turn to.
That said, you also have a right to lay down some rules. These people are adults (i assume?) and need to take responsibility for themselves. Is there any way you can support your daughter to move into a little unit (with her partner) saying that you are happy to support her but you feel they need to try things on their own? Maybe help financially with some aspects but try put the responsibility back on them to make ends meet for their little family. You have a right to say if it is getting to much for you, emotionally, physically and financially, and I'm sure your daughter will understand you want to help her but she also needs to try help herself?
As I said, i havent experienced this personally, but I know from people i work with (counselling) that theres a high chance of ruining the relationship if you are too tough, but you can't let people walk all over you, regardless of how much you care for them. All the best!View Thread
It sounds to me like he has simply drifted away from his friends, and really you can't force a relationship with people who aren't keen to be friends. I've found this myself, that I try to make the effort to see friends from school but during our meet ups I feel awkward, and different to them. It upset me that much how they left me out of things, that I saw a counsellor and she made a great point - maybe you (your fiance) has simply ungrown your (your fiances) friends and instead of trying to struggle to maintain a friendship that isnt working, why not make new friends or maintain the good relations you now have.View Thread
Oh gosh, dont feel bad! You are allowed to feel sad on your birthday when you feel like your own family werent making an effort for you.
I'm glad you received a nice card and visit from the 3 of them
You are right, things change a lot when people marry. My grandmother alone, feels like she hardly sees me. Before when single I was working full time, and bored on weekends so had time to travel to see her. Now married, we are always busy. Things do change. BUT one thing I know is that there is no excuse to forget a birthday or other significant thing in someones life. Even just a phone call, or a card in the post is something that brightens someones day. Maybe for next year you can set your expectations lower and if you receive a card again it will be a whole lot more meaningful. Not to say that you had high expectations this yr of course! But just maybe you wont be as sad and disappointed if you prepare yourself for next year if you get my drift...View Thread