Who'd a thunk I ran out of available characters in that post. Guess I'm getting pretty comfy talking to you so that's good! I don't do that often! You must be a special person
I want to tell you again how thankful I am you started this thread. I feel we have made an awesome connection and look forward to hearing from you each time you post. I just know we will become 'Best Friends" in no time. How awesome are you!!
I hope you're getting your beauty rest although I have no idea how you can be any more of a beautiful person than you are now.
Hi Dennis! I'm so happy to hear your bear of a week is over! Good for you for saying no and taking a break to take care of you. Maybe some day your boss will call and tell you that you have to be in Northern California Now THAT would be awesome! (That's my favorite word by the way).
I am also ecstatic to tell you I had a gr8 day today! I am finally pulling out of my Lupus Flare and on the mend....Look out! I'm baaack!! Now if my hair would hurry up and grow back I'd be a happy camper!! The worst part is over tho'. It was good to have your support as this was the worst flare I've experienced to date. Thank you for being there for me when nobody else was. It means a lot to me.
My Grand Daughter was with me today and I had a Dr.'s appt. which I took her to. She asked so many questions, (she's 3). And as we were walking behind the Dr. to get some info. from the printer, she started singing the song from her newest favorite cartoon, Dr. McStuffin's. "I feel better, so much better, thank you doc for takin' all my ouches away!" I've been singing it ever since hahaha!! What a joy she is!
We have many many things in common Dennis. TV, movies, music (I don't consider rap to be music, nor heavy metal lol). My favorite color is purple, I'm not very materialistic, and when asked what I want for Christmas or my Birthday or any gift, the answer is always the same,,,pictures. I love pictures! Love the Redwoods, the beach, camping, especially near the river. Nature! Spending time with my family and friends. I love to lol, sing, tho' not so good at it anymore so it's a good thing I live alone hehe. I haven't done it in a while, but I like crafting, sewing, woodworking (I used to make photo albums from Old Growth Redwood) and for my special friends and family I'd burn a picture on the cover. My sister loves hummingbirds so I burned a picture of a hummingbird feeding from a flower. I lost my wood supplier and don't know how to cut the wood. I miss doing that a lot! I love to be surrounded by caring, loving people, candle-light dinners along with good conversations. Diverse, open minded people, if we were all the same, life would be boring!! We think alike when it comes to things like "Ancient Aliens" lol. So many more I can't begin to list them all!
Dislikes= Rude people, confrontations, drama. Drunks, drugs etc. I'm a bit of a picky eater I suppose. Tend to go for the simple foods....Bugs lol, especially spiders! What can I say I'm a girl lol. Like to fish but not bait the hook hehe ewww! It took me years to be able to eat meat after seeing it raw, looong story lol. I'm sure there's more but I try not to dwell on the negative.
And yes you should inquire about Hospice and their various programs that might be available. At the very least they have reading material I'm sure you would enjoy.
Taking care of my ex-husband was probably the hardest yet the most rewarding thing I've ever done. We were divorced by that time and to tell you the truth I was glad I could do that for him. I wouldn't have wanted my boys to see their Father in his true form. Toward the end he wore two pairs of sweat-pants and shirts so no one could see how thin he had gotten. As I told you earlier, my views on the dying process are different than most. He is in a better place free of pain and suffering, a Butterfly who is bringing peace to many.
I would be glad to teach you how to cut and paste Dennis! You're never too old as long as you can work your mouse lol. For instance lesson one,,,,,go up to the address bar and put your arrow over the address,,,,click on the right side of your mouse and it will highlight the address and give you a list of things you can do like,,,cut,,,copy,,,paste,,,, take your arrow and click on "copy",,,, open a reply box here like you were going to reply to my post,,,, inside the box,,,right click on your mouse again and that same list will open,,,,choose paste,,,,hit the submit button and voila you've sent me a copy of this discussion lol. Practice!!View Thread
Hi Dennis, I forgot to suggest a great place to get help with your grieving process. Have you tried Hospice?
My first husband and Father of my two boys died of cancer in 2000. I took care of him and helped him so that he could pass in his own home. Hospice came and educated me on the dying process and was an awesome source of support for both of us. After he passed, they offered help and support in my grieving process and I really don't know how I would have made it through without their help!
Joining a support group for grieving may be something you would find helpful? Like I said before, I'm here if you ever need an ear or a shoulder.
Haha! You sound like me! I'm so emotional like that! I notice I lose control more when I haven't cried in a while but mostly when I'm down like you are now. I'm in a Lupus Flare as I said and having a really hard time getting back up this time. I don't have the support of my loved ones yet as none of them really know what I'm going through from day to day. I don't talk to them about it so it's my own fault.
I ran across another one of Christine's writings today that really hit home for me. I swear she is writing all the things I feel and going through but cannot find the words to express! If I didn't know better, I'd think she was reading my mind! Here is the link
You may find it fits you as well. Yes my health issues were hard to accept at first but now it's part of my life and I refuse to give up. Hey don't feel sad for me! I still have good times. My days aren't all bad, in fact I have more good days than bad ones for the most part. Pain is something that I live with, I've had it so long that I don't know what I'd do without it lol. It helps to talk about it especially when the person you're talking to is listening, even if they can't fully understand it. I'd rather live with the pain I have than go through the pain you're feeling any day.
What makes you laugh Dennis? I noticed I got an LOL out of you in your last post! That's a start! I love to laugh. I love witticisms. And I don't know what it is but there's a show on tru tv every Thursday called Inappropriate Jokers that makes me laugh till I cry. I hope they never take that show off the air. Do you like music? If so what kind do you listen to?
It's late and I must also get my beauty sleep, we may already be beautiful my friend but we can always strive for more right?
Hi Dennis, Before I forget to add this link, here is the explanation for the Spoon Theory. Christine Miserandino wrote it and there is no better explanation I have found. Christine is an advocate for Lupus, and has made many appearances all over educating people.I joined her support group 'But You Don't Look Sick' on Facebook. http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/
I wish I could take away your pain Dennis, but sadly we all must go through our own grieving process. It's never the same for anyone. I've lost too many loved ones and know it never gets easier to lose them but it does get easier to manage. I lost my Father when I was 18 and now 40 years later, I still miss him terribly. He was my hero and I was 'Daddy's Little Girl'. Every time I am overwhelmed I go to the beach which is where we spent many weekends surf-fishing, and sing "Daddy's Hands" by Holy Dunn to him. It seems to help.
Let yourself cry Dennis, one day you will wake up and find your tears nearly gone, your smile will come back I promise you that. You will begin to smile thinking about all the good things and your pain will ease up but it takes time. Accept it and quit fighting it you must let it run it's course. I will be here whenever you need someone to talk to. I have a good ear and a good shoulder. I love to listen to music and find certain songs fill my needs. For you I choose, 'You've Got A Friend" by James Taylor. Go to You Tube and listen to it carefully.
If you haven't rescheduled your appointment with your Therapist you should, it will help a lot. In the meantime, next time you are out among people, make a point to smile at someone who looks like they need one, they are free and pay you back ten-fold most of the time. You've made me smile just seeing you respond to my posts. I really do enjoy talking to you too Dennis, I think we have a very good connection going and would love to keep building on it. I could handle finding a Best Friend about now also. Did I ever thank you for starting this thread? I'm sorry if I didn't because otherwise I wouldn't have met you and I can't tell you how much it means to me to have a connection to someone who cares and you don't even know me so THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart!!!
I too am typing through tears, so I will go now. Take good care of yourself too Dennis, I look forward to hearing from you.
I am so sorry to hear you're still having such a bad time dealing with your loss. You don't have to text him you know, he is still right there beside you and you can talk to him any time you feel the need. He will send you a sign in some way to let you know he hears you.
Being you like to read I will tell you my thoughts on our life cycle. I love butterflies. I have butterflies in every room of my apartment, pictures, figurines, or whatever catches my eye. I truly believe our life-cycle is much like that of the butterfly. It starts out as this little caterpillar held to this Earth leading a somewhat mediocre life, then one day it encases itself in a cocoon. While in that cocoon, it transforms into this beautiful butterfly! Once fully developed, it's able to fly no longer bound to the Earth's surface. It flies from place to place all the while giving all who see it a smile or a calming thought while admiring it's beauty. We start out in our human form, bound to the Earth, much like the caterpillar. Then, one day, when our time here is done, we die, and like the caterpillar we transform into something far more extraordinarily beautiful and complex than anything we can imagine. And that's when our 'life' really begins. It's not here, but there.
Joe is no longer bound to his pain here on this Earth. His life-cycle was complete, he finished what he was sent here to accomplish. You were fortunate enough to have him in your life and I'm sure you will never regret one day of knowing him right? You will join him again one day, but for now your time here is not finished. Your family needs you as does all the people around you. For instance that person you smiled at today, maybe you gave that person a reason to take their next breath. Or someone who read your post on this site was given a little glimpse of hope that their problem isn't so bad that they can't cope. Or the new friend you made a few days ago feels a little richer for getting to know you and having you to talk to. Don't be sad he's gone, be glad for knowing him. I for one am glad you knew him because otherwise we may not have met and how sad would that be? Keep your chin up Dennis, it will get easier I promise you, think of the joy he brought you not the pain you feel now. Keep his memory alive by telling others what a fine human being he was. As long as he is in your heart, he is still with you.
As for me and my health, I can't change it I just have to work a little harder than most to keep my spirits up. There is no cure for any of my illnesses, only ways to slow it's progression or keep it at bay. I will tell you more another time. It's late and I have a long day tomorrow and I'm using up all my spoons lol.
I lived in Olympia, WA which is where I had my two sons. I liked it OK but it was too hot in the Summer! It was nice to have all the trees and the snow in the Winter wasn't so bad either. I so did NOT like Idaho! We lived in Twin Falls, and I could look out my window and see my whole days weather! LOL. There were mountains but it seemed you could drive forever and never get to them! One year I used my Philodendron for a Christmas tree cause there wasn't one to be found lol.
Yes, it was an awesome day when I met George. Like you I wasn't too keen on 'dating sites'. My friend from high school talked me into going to this site that I thought was like classmates.com because of the name so I went and signed up but soon noticed it was a place to meet people lol. For a few months I would visit for a quick glance to see what Penny was up to, and then one day for some reason I spent a little more time than usual. I got a message from George, telling me we matched at a pretty high score. Normally I didn't answer anyone's message but I went and checked out his profile. I saw his name and where he was from and knew right away we HAD to be related lol. Sooo I messaged him back and informed him of my suspicions and he thought I was nuts but after chatting back and forth for a while he agreed and by that time I was feeling sad cause I really started liking him a lot. We had so much in common and he made me laugh like nobody else could. I contacted the family historian to see how closely related we were and found out we were 6th Cousins. So with a sigh of relief I decided we weren't close enough that it mattered and here we are today! I mean what are the chances that I would meet him on a site I rarely went to, and talk to him only because we were related? So you see anything can happen especially when you aren't trying so don't ever give up looking for your Best Friend. You never know where you'll find them or they'll find you.
I don't read much sad to say. Among my myriad of problems I also have Narcolepsy and reading is a sure-fire way of putting me right to sleep, or I'll read a whole page and realize I haven't a clue what I just read! Discoid Lupus is an Auto Immune Disease. I was diagnosed at age 30. I was playing Women's Softball and our team was in first place at the end of the first day. I was pitcher, and didn't think too much about the possibility of a sunburn because it was a bit foggy but I got a little burned. The next day we played all day, and me without sunscreen and already burned, burned again ugh! We won the tournament and I went home to heal my wounds lol. I broke out in this strange rash and boy was I miserable! My life changed then and there. I couldn't go out in the sun anymore and the indoor lights were even bothering me. I learned to cut the drama out of my life and try very hard not to let stress get the better of me which is the hardest part I suppose. I was on Prednisone for a whole Summer. My Rheumatologist died about 5 years ago and because I thought I had it under control, didn't seek out another one. I didn't realize it could go Systemic until recently I started having other unexplained problems. Now the Dr. is pretty sure it's Systemic. This site is a gr8 one for learning more about it and everything else that's wrong with me. I won the health problem lottery I think lol. I am currently in a Lupus Flare so may not have enough energy to be online much for a while.
I watch movies to compensate for not being able to read love that rewind button! It's the most used button on the remote haha. We have a lot in common there too only you read it while I watch it lol. I'm always watching the History Channel or Science Channel. I love Ancient Aliens. And there's nothing wrong with love stories hehehe good you're in touch with your softer side
My Grand Daughter is here and I LOVE spending time with her so I will sign off for now. I'm enjoying our chats Dennis, let's keep them going
I hope you take Dr. Phelps' advice and keep seeking therapy, I know first hand how much that helps! I've had to seek it a time or two myself
My Family is awesome and I'm glad to be fortunate enough to have stumbled across them so-to-speak. A lot of them are very musically inclined. I wish I had half the talent that most of them do and I am a huge fan of music.
We don't live very close I'm afraid...I live in the heart of the Redwoods on the Pacific Coast, located in Northern California, which is an AWESOME place to live!! Like I said, George will be moving here from KY next month because I am not willing to leave this area. For one, my family is here, I have two grown boys and two Grandkids plus three Step-Grandkids.
I grew up here and tried to live in other areas, WA, ID, and various places in CA, but none could compare to Humboldt County. The temp. stays in the 50s and 60s nearly year around which is good for Discoid Lupus. We have the Pacific Ocean 5 minutes away, the mountains 20 minutes to the East, and the Redwoods both North and South.
I am 58 since May, so am your elder! lol. You tower above me by 10". Since it's not polite to ask a female their weight, I'll say I pack a few extra pounds hehe. Blonde, yes I've heard so many blonde jokes I could write a book! Only problem is,,,I can't remember enough to fill the pages ;-/ would that be because I'm old or blonde? Hmm. We have the same taste in movies I think. My health has kept me from doing a lot of the outdoor activities that I used to do tho.
You are on the right path Dennis. I know how you feel. The security is a problem in almost every aspect of all things 'internet' that's for sure!
I have always had a problem meeting people. I am a shy type of person until you get to know me,,,then, once I get comfortable look out! HaHa! For some reason I am more open on the social networks than anywhere else. I have met a whole lot of my family I didn't even know existed until I went to Facebook! I found out I am related to both sides of the famous feud of the Hatfields and McCoys! And John Wayne, who's name is really Marion Morrison, and Jim Morrison to name a few! Now I'm looking for my Father's side to see what's in store for me on that side!
This is a great place to get to know people too. I have just stumbled across it looking for answers to my myriad of medical problems and am so thankful for this site. It has grown so much since I first used it and sorry I didn't keep in touch with it.
Dennis I wish you all the best in your path to find a Best Friend, and would be happy to get to know you better. I hope we run into each other here and there.