Untidy with my man does mean dirty! Drawers with nothing but junk in them. He lives in a very old house that he's been slowly remodeling. I've added my things to his and everything is so much prettier and looks like a home. I admit my things are eclectic and some are girly things but it doesn't look like a female only home...just one with lots of knick knacks and cutsies. I can understand lots of clutter but draw the line at clean. I am OCD about clean. I know it and I'm trying to work on it but I find I wash my hands a lot and scald the sink and sponges with hot water and use clorox spray a lot!! I suppose I could work on being less rigid about it...but having a happy, clean and tidy home is all I need to be happy with him. It's not that much to ask! Thanks for your thoughts! ~bjView Thread
I realized the way he lived the first time I was at his house. I kept quiet about it because I never thought about living there....and he'd been with me and at my condo many times so he knew how I lived. He knew my expectations were high and I am less flexible with this issue than any other....I guess to him these are minor issues and shouldn't upset me as much as they do. Maybe he's right. He says I'm trying to change him and I say I'm trying to make him better. Maybe he doesn't want to be better. I don't see me lowering my standards so we have got to find a compromise.
Thanks, Dennis for taking time to share your thoughts. I think you are right. It's my delivery that bothers him. He's done a great job and he tries to keep things picked up...I guess I just wish her were more passionate about it. By that I mean doing it because he likes things clean rather than just to please me or keep me from bitching at him. I don't want to sound like his mother..I just want him to feel good about how much I care about our home together and realize that, hey, having a nice clean home is really nice...instead he just says it's not important to him. He is really a good person and good to me. He's trying hard but years of being around other's that didn't care just encouraged the lifestyle. I will be more delicate and less critical. Thanks, again! bjView Thread
I admit I am a neat nick! I am almost compulsive about it, in fact my man says I am. We have been living together for about 4 months and he's done very well at making an effort to improve and please but he finds that I am too critical, too pushy with my expectations and that it's just not important to him. I have trouble wrapping my mind around anyone not wanting a clean home. What am I doing wrong?View Thread