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I have a friends wedding to go to on Sunday and the thought of wearing a dress is really stressing me out. I lost a whole load of weight last year but have put some back on so not feeling confident at all and then I am having to wear a dress, which means some scars will be on show.
The fact that I hate my body etc doesn't help but every time I think I get a handle on my scars something like this comes up and throws me a curve ball. I know they are part of me and part of my history but when I am feeling low anyway, with sh thoughts higher in my consciousness than they have been for a while ... just want to hide and not go out/see anyone at all.View Thread
You have had a tough week and when you come home (or there is knock at the door) there is a package for you! What would you want to be inside that would brighten your weekend that much more?
For me...and it's a bit corny...but a bouqet of lillies. coral colored lillies. i bought myself flowers 2 weeks ago from the store (they are still very alive!) and thought K would get the hint...since I did get a whopping nothing on our 3yr anniversary (I made him a lovely card...Ill have to share a pic!)...but someone to send me flowers. to appreciate the woman I am and to show me that I am beautiful even tho I have a habit of forgetting....
Ok this is supposed to be fun! ha! and I am such a downerrrrr but really i am a romantic and i just melt over a lovely spray of flowers. makes me giddy! lol
So what you want to get? a dinner? new shoes? art supplies? a rocking chair for the porch? Share away!!!View Thread
Things are rather difficult for me at the moment and had massive breakdown a couple weeks ago as everything is all catching up with me. Not that I want to say much but really thigns not good. Im not a praying sort but if any of you are please pray for my family and my father. I just do not want to see him suffer. This coming weekend will be very very very hard and I do not know how I will put on the brave fron tto get through it but somehow I know I will
anyhow hugs to allView Thread
Will it make loosing Caprice easier for you if you pick her apart and destroy her? Its like you won't be happy till you have slain her on line and smeared her out of your life.
I know the MO. there are many in my wake before I changed. Hating her will not make that pain in your heart go away.View Thread
On top of that, despite the fact that I've cut dairy and soy from my diet, my daughter is still not sleeping, is super fussy, and having bloody stools. I want to go on a total elimination diet to determine what she's allergic to but my pediatrician doesn't seem familiar with this and all the information I've found online states different things so I don't even know where to begin.
Just so stressed and crying. I need a break. God please.View Thread
HAVING A HARD TIME TYPING CUZ ITS SO SPEEDED UP AND SO FAST AND I CAN'T EVEN TYPE AS FAST AS MY IMPULSES ARE GOING!
I THINK THIS STUPID DOCTOR SHE CALLS HER SELF IS OUT TO GET ME. IT MAKES ME SO MAKE ME SO MADDDDD!!!!!!!!!View Thread
HAVING A HARD TIME TYPING CUZ ITS SO SPEEDED UP AND SO FAST AND I CAN'T EVEN TYPE AS FAST AS MY IMPULSES ARE GOING!
I THINK THIS STUPID DOCTOR SHE CALLS HER SELF IS OUT TO GET ME. IT MAKES ME SO MAKE ME SO MADDDDD!!!!!!!!!View Thread
THAT BPD CAUSES US TO STAY IN CRISIS WETHER THAT BE OUR THINKING OR JUST CAUSE. ME INCLUDED. EVEN THO I BE 3 SHEETS TO THE WIND.... I CAN MAKE SENSE!!
I CAN EVEN TYPE BETTER. HA HA
SO HERE IT IS AND ANYONE CAN GET MAD AT ME OR NOT.
I HAD THIS WOMAN SAY IN OUR GROUP A FEW WEEKS AGO WHAT I MENTIONED ABOVE THAT WE ARE IN CRISIS. WE STAY IN CRISIS BECAUSE THAT IS ALL WE KNOW!!!!
THERE IS NO BLAME TAKEN OR GIVEN PERIOD!!!! HERE THERE OR ANYWHERE. IT JUST IS.... CAN YOU WRAP YOUR HEAD AROUND THAT???
I HAVE BEEN ON THIS FORUM FOR AT LEAST 10 YEARS IF NOT LONGER. DURING THAT TIME I KNEW MANY PEOPLE SAME AS DD KITYY OTW AND LLT. NEVER IN THAT TIME DID I FEEL THAT CAPRICE LED ME ASTRAY OR THAT THE INFORMATION PORTRAID HERE WAS INCORRECT ON HER BEHALF OR NOT.
SIMPLE.... SHE LEFT OR NOT... MAYBE BEHIND THE SCENES OR NOT.... AND ITS AS SIMPLE AS THAT.
NOTHING MORE NOTHING LESS.... I FOUND THAT MY PARANOIA IS PART OF MY BPD. ONCE I SEE THAT I GET IT. WE DON'T HAVE TO BE HOUNDED BY WHAT WEB MD DID OR DIDN'T DO. THE SIMPLE FACT IS DO WE CHOOSE TO REMAIN A CYBER FAMILY OR NOT???
I ASKED LAST NIGHT FOR A POST TO BE REMOVED AND IT WAS APPARENTLY QUICKLY DONE SO. SO WHERE'S THE BEEF??
CAN WE PLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MOVE ON. I MEAN NO DISRESPECT AND IF SOME IS TAKEN THEN I TRULY WILL APOLOGIZE FOR IT NOW.
I AM NOT NOT VALIDATING ANY ENTITY ANY PERSON OR ANYTHING ABOUT THESE SUBJECTS.
JUST SAYIN..... .... RIGHT NOW MY LIFE IS IN JEOPARDY...
I'M NOT ASKING PERIOD FOR THE SPOTLIGHT TO BE MOVED BECAUS EOF ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 NOT AT ALL. BECAUSE I DON'T REALLY GIVE A RATS ARSE IF I SURVIVE OR NOT... I'M SAYING THAT I LOVE YOU AND WANT YOU TO SUCCEED IN WHATEVER VENTURE YOU CHOOSE TO GO TO.
NOW OF COURSE THERE WILL BE RETHORIC ON THIS ALL THREAD THAT'S OK. IT'S GOOD FOR DISCUSSION.
BUT LETS DO THAT HAVE A DISCUSSION... AND COME UP WITH SOME CONSTRUCTIVE THINGS ABOUT THIS MATTER SINCE IT SEEMS TO KEEP COMING UP.
View Thread
THAT BPD CAUSES US TO STAY IN CRISIS WETHER THAT BE OUR THINKING OR JUST CAUSE. ME INCLUDED. EVEN THO I BE 3 SHEETS TO THE WIND.... I CAN MAKE SENSE!!
I CAN EVEN TYPE BETTER. HA HA
SO HERE IT IS AND ANYONE CAN GET MAD AT ME OR NOT.
I HAD THIS WOMAN SAY IN OUR GROUP A FEW WEEKS AGO WHAT I MENTIONED ABOVE THAT WE ARE IN CRISIS. WE STAY IN CRISIS BECAUSE THAT IS ALL WE KNOW!!!!
THERE IS NO BLAME TAKEN OR GIVEN PERIOD!!!! HERE THERE OR ANYWHERE. IT JUST IS.... CAN YOU WRAP YOUR HEAD AROUND THAT???
I HAVE BEEN ON THIS FORUM FOR AT LEAST 10 YEARS IF NOT LONGER. DURING THAT TIME I KNEW MANY PEOPLE SAME AS DD KITYY OTW AND LLT. NEVER IN THAT TIME DID I FEEL THAT CAPRICE LED ME ASTRAY OR THAT THE INFORMATION PORTRAID HERE WAS INCORRECT ON HER BEHALF OR NOT.
SIMPLE.... SHE LEFT OR NOT... MAYBE BEHIND THE SCENES OR NOT.... AND ITS AS SIMPLE AS THAT.
NOTHING MORE NOTHING LESS.... I FOUND THAT MY PARANOIA IS PART OF MY BPD. ONCE I SEE THAT I GET IT. WE DON'T HAVE TO BE HOUNDED BY WHAT WEB MD DID OR DIDN'T DO. THE SIMPLE FACT IS DO WE CHOOSE TO REMAIN A CYBER FAMILY OR NOT???
I ASKED LAST NIGHT FOR A POST TO BE REMOVED AND IT WAS APPARENTLY QUICKLY DONE SO. SO WHERE'S THE BEEF??
CAN WE PLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MOVE ON. I MEAN NO DISRESPECT AND IF SOME IS TAKEN THEN I TRULY WILL APOLOGIZE FOR IT NOW.
I AM NOT NOT VALIDATING ANY ENTITY ANY PERSON OR ANYTHING ABOUT THESE SUBJECTS.
JUST SAYIN..... .... RIGHT NOW MY LIFE IS IN JEOPARDY...
I'M NOT ASKING PERIOD FOR THE SPOTLIGHT TO BE MOVED BECAUS EOF ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 NOT AT ALL. BECAUSE I DON'T REALLY GIVE A RATS ARSE IF I SURVIVE OR NOT... I'M SAYING THAT I LOVE YOU AND WANT YOU TO SUCCEED IN WHATEVER VENTURE YOU CHOOSE TO GO TO.
NOW OF COURSE THERE WILL BE RETHORIC ON THIS ALL THREAD THAT'S OK. IT'S GOOD FOR DISCUSSION.
BUT LETS DO THAT HAVE A DISCUSSION... AND COME UP WITH SOME CONSTRUCTIVE THINGS ABOUT THIS MATTER SINCE IT SEEMS TO KEEP COMING UP.
View Thread
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TRIGGER
TRIGGER
SO I'LL MAKE SOMETHING INCUOUS..... ITS SNOWING TO BEAT THE BAND AND
I WANT TO DIE
I WANT GOD TO TAKE ME
I WANT TO BLEED AND I WANT TO SCORCH
I WANT I WANT I WANTView Thread
MayDay
Beltaine
Like Spring, I'm a seed waiting to germinate, grow, and flourish.
Love
My Sisters and Brothers here
All of the wisdom shared here that has helped me to grow this past year.
Next....View Thread
KateView Thread
who's out there?
drowning
failing
no longer trying to keep the head above water
easier to surrender to the insanity
crazy
psychotic
bubbly
perceptionView Thread
You came across information about someone you and your very close friends know.
This person is someone you all love and trust.
This information could be devastating and rip apart all you believed about this someone and all that you shared.
Would you want to know?View Thread
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THIS MORNING I WOKE WITH A CALL THAT MY OFFICE MGR HAD HER CAR SMASHED WINDOW IN WITH A ROCK AND THAT HER PURSE HAD BEEN STOLEN AND HER OFFICE KEYS. THAT MEANT THAT MY IDENTITY FOR MY BUSINESS AND PERSONALLY WERE AT STAKE. HER BUSINESS C.C. WAS STONLEN HOWEVER I CANCELED AND THEY'D AREADY CHARGED 800.00 WHICH IS HER LIMIT. MY BUSINESS IS NOT DOING WELL MAJOR FRIGGIN ISSUES WITH THIS. MAJOR MAJOR ISSUES WITH THIS WHICH MEAN S LIVELY HOOD IS AT STAKE BUT I HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT GOD IS THERE. IM SHAKING SO BAD I CAN HARDLY STAND IT. I TEXTED MY BFF AND SAID WEN YOU HAVE AMINUTE IM IN A MESS SHE CALLED ME AND SAID SHE HAD ON EMINUTE WHICH WASN'T LIKE HER BUT I DIDN'T TUMBLE. SO I BREIFLY SAID WAT WAS GOIN ON AND AND THEN SHE TOLD ME HER MOM HAS A STOMACH ANURISM AND I'M ASSUMING THAT SHE'LL BE LEAVING THE STATE TO GO BACK HOME. GOD I FELT BAD STILL FEEL SO BAD. I ACHE FOR HER! SHE JUST LOST HER SIS IN LAW SHE LOVED SO DEARLY AND SHE IS SO CLOSE TO HER MOM.
CALLED ANOTHER FRIEND AND TALKED TO FRIENDS HUSBAND AND THAT HELPED FOR A BIT AND HE HELPED GUIDE ME TO GOD TOO AND THEN FINALLY MY T CALLED AND SHE HELPED TOO.
TRYING TO CALM HAVE SH'D PRETTY BAD BUT.... I MISS ALL MY LASSIES HERE.
I PRYA ALL OF YOU WILL BE DOING OK. I HOPE EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU ALL MY LOVE I HAVE RIGHT NOW IN THIES MOMENTView Thread
Kinda like when Newsy left. Nothing can fill the void of all these people.
Riddleyxxx, Evolcat, BHH, Sammie, Racheal, Toby, Sandy, Fell_out_Bed....so many others....
I am richer person having known all of them.
Damn you wmd. You should have let us say goodbye to our friend. I can understand the callous way it was done, but my littles cannot.
will not.
This headspace will pass, I will eventually place mama Caprice into the category of the others listed above. Names on a paper, but not forgotten. Place in the MIA folder in my brain and just accept I will never know what became of them.
lost today. need a lap to curl up into and rest quietly in a sun beam.View Thread
Today in denver they had the great smoke or whatever they called it because pot is legal here. i guess anyone can buy it and its just not medical marijuanna ??? not sure Kitty can you weigh in on this??
but anyway (I new this was going to happen!!) there was a shooting down there or two! 80k people smokin pot... WOW!
I've decided I don't care anymore if i'm in an earthquake when i go to cali, get physically hurt by someone, beat up, shot at, or anything else that would be catastrophic even being killed by something!! I don't care because I know God's got my back and will protect me. If it's my time to go it's my time to go! if someones in my room and they slice me o well!
if someone lays a bomb from the sky from the airplanes and helicopters o well!
i'm tired of being scared ! I've been beat up, I've been in an earthquake, I've been hurt by someone, shot at, in a flood, in major car accidents including a head on, have had major surgeries 4x's, bore two children, have been so poor i had to use food stamps to make ends meet, and on and on! so what's so damn scary! is just bein damn scared! and i'm not gonna take it anymore! it does bother me however at the moment tho that i'm hearing voices from my table. o well come and get me voices! whatever you have to say i' aint listenin!
bean town i'm so sorry this had to happen to you! God bless and God speedView Thread
She is going to turkey soon and has an infant with milk problem... don't know anything about this but thought i'd send it on to you.
g'niteView Thread
I feel like hell.View Thread
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