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I hurt my stomach. Nothing horrible. they're all pretty minor, considering my history. I just feel so stupid for giving in. Like, "Well, I already gave in once. Why not keep going till I'm just one big mess?" I'm not going to give in to the thought of really hurting myself. I have that much power over the thoughts. But not so much over the more minor injury thoughts.
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Diphenhydramine, the main component of Benadryl and Tylenol PM doesn't really knock me out on its own. I have to take something else in conjunction to get me off to sleep. I took a sleepy pill last night and I slept pretty well.
I've only been on the propranolol for a week. I need to give it more time to come up to a therapeutic level in my blood. I've been journaling and doing some coloring, as well as putting around on hulu.com to watch my shows. I just wish that video rental stores still existed. Its all mail-order nowadays. X-PView Thread

I called the PHP I was in to try to get back in. They turned me down and told me to call another place. That place is full. They won't have a slot for a month or more.
AUGH! I can't sit still! Its driving me crazy! Especially when I'm just trying to get something done. Like sleep!!!View Thread

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I have an almost overwhelming desire to cut my arms very deeply. I don't know why. Nothing out of the ordinary has happened, aside from my little nephew being born. And thats an exciting, GOOD event in my life. When I was getting dressed today, I looked down at my legs and thought, "Well, the scars are fading pretty well. As long as I don't do anything else like that (a very deep cut on my calf) I'd be okay. If I went up high on my thigh, no one would ever even see it. I could do that." **shudders** And I am really just barely keeping myself from cutting my arms.
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I really need to do dishes and fold/put away my laundry. My back is still buggin' out. I'm okay to sit (with proper support) or lay down, but standing/walking is painful. I really don't want to be in this much pain for another five weeks till I see the doctor again. Theres only so much codiene I can take and not sleep for hours at a time. And thats not much! Even half a tab puts me out. I'm just feeling very BLAH. And tired. And depressed. Very depressed.
I see my psychiatrist tomorrow. That'll be a 20 minute drive for a ten minute appt.

Gonna try to do sum dishes. *tired sigh*View Thread




Yesterday, the 7th, my sister had her baby!! Its a boy!! (I was right!) Spent the majority of yesterday at the hospital waiting for the big moment. I lub my new nephew. I got to hold him when he was just a few hours old. Soooooo precious!!View Thread
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