It is not wrong for you to feel the way you do. If I were you I would let this clown know that if in the unlikely event I did agree to give him a BJ that I could in no way guarantee the safety of his boy parts. View Thread
I strongly support Georgiagail's suggestion of scheduling sex nights or date nights or whatever you choose to call them. Our hectic lives get in the way and a little pre-planning assures us that we can take time for intimacy. The planning and anticipation enhance the evening with intimacy always at the end. We have been doing this for the past seven years and the "new" hasn't worn off yet.
It's also nice to have notice so you can shave your legs and take care of a little personal maintenance beforehand.
I doubt any shrinkage of your penis and the fact you had a vasectomy are connected. Maybe something else is going on that is not connected to the vasectomy.
About two years after our second child was born my husband had a vasectomy and it certainly had no effect on his penis size, testicle size or libido. If anything happened, the psychological benefit of no more concerns about birth control may have enhanced his libido. I know it increased mine.
Sorry but I have to call "B.S." on this one. What makes a man a man is the hormones that have developed and maintained the male characteristics. These help develop the facial hair, genital development, lower voice, and so on. Since a vasectomy has nothing to do with these things, it can't affect a man's "maleness."
For the last five years we have sex dates on our calendar which works very good for us. Even with this scheduled sex sometimes it is fun to have some unscheduled bonus love making.
When I initiate, I usually strip naked and walk into the room where he is working or surfing the web and grab his hand and say, "Come with me young man" and lead him to the bedroom. So far it has never failed and I love the look on his face when this happens.
Started having sex with my guy at 16. It was great. Thirty-seven years later it's even better. A few minor blips though the years - babies - health issues - menopause - wrinkles - but the trend has been all positive. We are looking forward to many more years of intimacy.
Since he is now clearly aware of your desire for sex and is still unwilling to take care of your needs while he selfishly indulges in sex with himself, it is up to you to accept that celibacy is tolerable or you can reevaluate your position that divorce or separation is off the table.
I could accept celibacy in the case of physical impairment of my partner but I would have trouble while he is self pleasuring would be very difficult.
I agree with Question. Masturbation is fine until it interferes with partnered sex. View Thread