I agree with srotu that sex is not the be all and end all in marriage. But -- it is a very important component and I personally would not want to be without it. If something happened that I couldn't have sex with my husband I would learn to accept it but it would be a loss and I would miss it. I am post menopausal (hopefully) and I very much enjoy sex and cannot remember ever thinking of sex as obligatory. We have had a few dry spells where sex wasn't as frequent as we wanted but we always bounced back. I always thought of it as just the ebb and flow of life. Maybe I am just in the minority but sex in my later years seems better. The kids are gone and we have more time together and sex is as important to both of us as it was when we were twenty years old. Our bodies show the ravages of time but our desire for each other has not waned.
After nearly 35 years of marriage my sex life is still wonderful. During our marriage we have had some ups and downs but have managed to keep good lines of communication and thus have avoid any serious consequences.
I had a hysterectomy a few years after the birth of our second child and have never regretted it. If it had any impact on my sex life it was positive.
Menopause has brought it's challenges but with the help of HRT this too has been overcome. I feel very fortunate and I am looking forward to many more years of a wonderful and intimate relationship with a man who is a loving husband and my closest friend. He still makes my heart beat faster when he smiles at me.View Thread
My guy is the love of my life, my best friend, the father of my two kids and my lover. I was 18 and he was 21 when we married. We were both alienated from our families and sort of grew up together and this "us against the world" mentality seemed to create a trust and love that I think strengthened our marriage. In our early years we struggled financially and could load all our possessions in the backseat of a 1969 Plymouth, which made moving simple, but we were happy and so much in love.
My guy still turns me on and our love has grown stronger throughout the 34 years we have been married. He is a wonderful father and grandfather and treats me like a princess or queen or some kind of royalty. We have faced life's challenges together and somehow endured. We both have worked hard at our marriage and so far no issues, serious or petty, have come close to derailing us. Our life is good. I have no complaints.
dfgbull, you are correct in the fact that I am not sensitive to men that show no respect for their wives or their wedding vows or those who act as their apologists. I also have similar lack of sensitivity to wives who act in the same manner. A person's true character reveals itself in times of adversity. It's easy to be noble in good times. View Thread
My sympathy is with your wife. You may want sex but you don't need sex. Your wife is in pain and it is understandable that she does not want sex. What happened to for better or worse in sickness and in health?View Thread
An_241281, you are certainly normal, its your boyfriend that should be concerned about his libido. I am a post-menapausal woman and 10 days is longer than I want to go without sex and I don't think I am oversexed by any means. 3point14 has given great advice.
wonderingaboutthis I think you are accurate in your assessment. Back in prehistoric times I had a lot of anxiety over the scent of my vagina in love making situations. My guy used to tell me he liked it just as it was and not to worry about it. Over the years his reassurance has finally overcome the message of the ads for all kinds of smell good potions and douches and finally I have come to accept that he does indeed like my natural scent. It sure makes recieving oral sex more relaxing and enjoyable.