I have never even thought of speaking about the things that happened to me as a child and when I think back I...
Posted by An_260758
I have never even thought of speaking about the things that happened to me as a child and when I think back I convince myself it was all nothing. I read other people's stories and I think because I wasn't raped it's not considered child abuse and I need to get over it. I don't know what I want from this site. I feel sick just writing this. I feel like I'm making a mountain out of a molehill. From the age of ....well as far back as I can remember my uncle abused me. He would make me sit on his knee and place his hand deep into my lap. He woukd also cuddle me and tickle me in inappropriate places and if we were alone he would grab my breasts and feel them he woukd also often make crude remarks. This went on until about the age of 16. Im now 32 and completely confused. Why is this bothering me now? someone help me understand exactly what happened to me? Am I being silly feeling like I've been abused?View Thread
it's been seven years since he was put he away. i was only 15 years old at the time. ive notcied that with every day that grows closer to his release, i get more and more on edge. I cant help but panic anytime he enters my mind. I was diagnosed with PTSD, it hasnt effected me much until now. now i cant wake up or let alone do anything without a single thought of him entering my mind. I feel lost, i dont know what to do. what if he comes back to hurt me? or worse, my family? What if he comes for revenge? because i stole seven years of his life? i feel as if this is all my fault....View Thread
I'm 45 and am still dealing with has happened to me when I was a child how do you forgive and move on. I am having problems now in my personal relationship. I have no resources for therapy so I thought I might try this . It can't hurt right.View Thread
I forgot my information so had to create a new acct.
It's me Gorge in case you were wondering.Well tonight I'm doing a lot of thinking and I know I shouldn't be.I'm a little nervous cause for the first time I'm going to start something different.This year my mom wants to spent thanksgiving with us.I can't remember the last time we all were sitting at the same dinner table.
I don't know what to expect or what the conversation is gonna be like.I have let go of some things but there's a lot I haven't so I don't know.I have doubts cause it took a lot for me to get to this part in my life and I don't know how I feel about it.I don't want this to turn into a shouting match or anything so I'm nervous.
Part of me wants to try cause in a way I miss my mom and the part is thinking it's a bad idea.I already said yes so I can't go back on my word cause that's not who I am.
Goodnight ladies and I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!View Thread
I have an abused teen who need a sane , emotionally healthy Therapist in Maryland and I haven't had any luck finding one. I tried a Therapist who was also a Director at a Christian counseling center and he was terrible. I thought at a Christian counseling center they would be caring, I was wrong.I have also tried at least eight others with no luck. They have all been very damaged people in need of Therapy themselves. Their has to be some good ones out here, or is their no help for sexually abused kids? If anyone know anyone good who works with teens please respond or, if their happens to be any Therapists/Counselors on here who are good please respond. I'm desperate to find help for my son. Anyone else had this experience? Are all Therapists in need of Therapy? ThanksView Thread
My name is Sarah, I was first molested when i was three years old, and agian from the ages of 13-15. not only was i molested by a family friend at 13, my stepfather was trying to touch me and making sexual remarks. I tried to tell my mother about it, she didnt believe me. I was taken from my home when i was 15 and placed in foster care until i turned 18. I just wanted to say that life is rough, and bad things do happen to good people all the time. But it DOES get better. I think that if these things didnt happen to me, i wouldnt be the person i am today. It may seem hard, but you have to tell someone! look for signs in children, they may become distant, or quiet. They may flinch when you try to touch them, dont ever turn you back like my mother did. Listen to what they have to say, and report it! I just wanted to share my story with people who are going through similar things that i went through. I would like to be that person someone can talk to, someone to vent to, i want to be that inspiration on someone. I want someone to look at me and say "because of you, ididnt give up."View Thread
Having a hard time controlling the voices in my.Been to the er two times already but nothing.The voices are...
Posted by An_247346
Having a hard time controlling the voices in my.Been to the er two times already but nothing.The voices are really making demands and it is hard not to act.I know it's wrong but they're getting too loud to ignore them now.View Thread
I am looking for help with repressed memories. They are from 17 years ago when I was 6 years old. I started to have flashbacks 11 years ago and they only happened when triggered so I stayed away from the triggers. I got married 8 months ago and that is when I became physically (intimately) active. Since then they have gotten more intense and will happen even without obvious triggers. Recently I remembered something that I had never remembered before. I need to learn more about what happened all those years ago so that I can move forward and prevent it from causing any problems. If you know anything about repressed memories or something related please get in touch with me. Thank you.View Thread
Wanted to share this article my cousin pointed out to me about the Hindu Goddess Akhilandeshvari or The Always Broken Goddess.
"It's the kind of broken that tears apart all the stuff that gets us stuck in toxic routines, repeating the same relationships and habits over and over, rather than diving into the scary process of trying something new and unfathomable.Akhilanda derives her power from being broken: in flux, pulling herself apart, living in different, constant selves at the same time, from never becoming a whole that has limitations."
It was really good ro see you, even of it was quick. i know it was really i miss you, they removed any trace that you were here, but a few of is that you really were here, i miss you. they can not stop you, take care maybe can see maybe you again View Thread
Just popped in, and it's nice to see the board is quiet which I will take to mean that we are enjoying our holidays (and indulging in too many sugar cookies)! I hope everyone is well and may this year bring you happiness (HUGS)View Thread
I know that when the holidays come around it can be hard for some. For some it can be really rough and I'm pray for everyone.I pray that everyone holidays are good and you stay safe.Things are just a little shaky right now but I'm trying to keep in mind the advice I was given here.Keep my faith in god and try to keep moving forward.Try to stay sane the best I can.Had a conversation with my sister and it just has me thinking a lot tonight,more then usually I guess.
Those out there battling mental demons and unprepared situation keep in mind to reach out for help.I don't think there's such things as too much help or advice good that is.That's why I have things lined up just in case something comes up to be safe.
Keeping everyone in my thoughts and prayers.While I'm praying for you would you pray for me?Cause I'm not prefect!!!View Thread
The holidays are here, and that is a rough time for many of us. Perhaps posting some things we are grateful for may help?
1. I am grateful for God's mercy and patience. 2. I am grateful that I have the use of my left hand/arm while the right wrist is healing. 3. I am grateful for friends, neighbors, coworkers and family who have helped in various ways during my recovery. 4. And I am grateful for a million other things...eyesight, my pets, a roof over my head, and on and on.
To quote a fellow survivor, "Peace be the journey." Be safe, everyone.
They think someone's life is something to mes over then turn around and laugh about it.I think they deliberately did what they did to a few people on this board.
I'm try to keep this one clean but I can't promise nothing tho.I didn't just come here making all this noise for two or three people but for myself.I don't get this time frame business that some put on you.Cause for anyone who has or have been abused it don't come with a time or date stamped with it.After being raped,abused or violated there is no time frame on that regardless of what someone say.Some things just hit you outta the blue and some come up when that person is willing and able to deal with it.
It can take years before someone even realize that something is off in their life and some time after the realization of it set in.Some people go half of their life without confronting their issues.What take a person months to get over may take someone else longer so you can't come at me with that mess about the past.It doesn't matter if it happened 6 months,6 years or 6 decades ago it depends on the person.Take that past bull and toss out the window with the rest.
I couldn't walk away from this issue for one the situation was foul.Two I know the feeling of being betrayed by your supporters.I don't know SK but I know the situation.Just like abuse that kind of thing stays with a person and makes it worst when the person is being forced to let it go.The main key players in all of this is just hanging back and not saying anything.But this is what they do more than it needed to be.These girls are like tornadoes that touch down,do their damage and you're left to deal with things.They'll move on to somewhere else and you're stuck with the pain and suffering of their actions.
I know what it's like to be threaten,stalked,have people invade your life,afraid to sleep in your own home because you don't feel safe and you trusted these people.So if it makes me wrong for standing up for someone you need someone to speak for them then I don't wanna be right.Still nobody here to help her cause they are still in the trenches of this.I don't have guilt,remorse,respect or manners for anyone who won't even acknowledge that they cause one pain and put them in harms way.Or anyone who support or tolerate this kind of abuse and don't care what others gotta say.
Then you wanna get your granny panties in a bunch when someone come at you.I'm not friendly and that's off the rip it's cool but I'm still speak the truth.If I'm suppose to be a real and loyal supporter than that's what I'm do when being asked too.
How does it feel to abuse someone that came here for help?View Thread
I'm new and have no clue what all the drama is about. But, Its a shame this forum isn't used for what its intended for helping people heal from sexual abuse. This place has so much potential. A place just to help yourself heal from your battle scars from SA and a place to find others who share the same pain you do. Thank you for your help with my issue bluerose90, aenriquez25, marysings, tnmist, and slik_kitty. God Bless.View Thread
I'm just simply talking here and it doesn't have to turn into an battle.If someone for some reason comes on here angry then there's a reason for it.But the message some are sending is that it doesn't matter why this person is angry just ignore them and move on.When we should be showing those that come or are looking in that we can take the time to find why this person is so angry.Show other I can hear you out and you can do the same for me.When I came here and read some of the stories it was like I was looking in the mirror.
It so happens that I agree with therapy cause it doesn't take anything good from you.I found out after I had a fall out with a few people here some time back.It's hard and can be a very long road but sometimes you gotta walk alone.You have to fight the pain and most you may feel like you can't handle it but you can and you will.Each step in therapy is a stepping stone and it set me up for whatever life throw at me.Gotta take a chance and stay with it and things will get easier for you.If it'll better your life then go for even if it's a challenge for you cause you will be glad that you did in the end.
The support that you get from therapy will never waver even when you're paying for it.Some days your life may be unbalance still stick with it.I accept every challenge cause the fall out I use it for motivation to keep moving. I'm not the one to talk the talk and then run and hide out.If you wanna convince me then show me and if you gonna talk about it then be about it.When someone is abused or violated they don't what to do or think after with the fear and can't see your way clear through the tears.In your sessions you have to let yourself fall completely apart and be put back together.Deal with each issue in order to move on with your life.
Dealing with things it's then and only then can you let a matter go.So for people like me as it was stated I can't let anything in my past until I deal with it.That's the whole point of going to therapy and I don't see how people think you are suppose to drop things and just leave it alone.I don't know any other way of dealing with other than confronting the person or problem.View Thread
If this board is triggering/angering you, please just don't come here right now. A couple of us are checking for new people who are reaching out for help, so don't feel compelled to check right now.
As for me, I simply refuse to respond to the angry, board-damaging posts because I look at it as bait, even if I feel they are talking about me and especially if I might reply in anger myself. That only hurts the board further. If you are reading posts here, I am appealing to you to please stop and wait before possibly replying on an emotional level. Please practice restraint in that circumstance.
Personally, I am stronger these days overall, and I am not triggered by the angry posts. If you are feeling vulnerable, just tell yourself that you will check it another day.
Please also consider this, especially if you are Christian: The angry posters are lashing out anywhere they can because they themselves are hurting deeply, and it really isn't about this board or about you. They have had so many hurtful things happen to them that their anger spills over wherever they go. I appeal to the rest of us to look beyond their anger and realize it is masking deeply hurt persons. I am not excusing it; however, please realize that responding (ESPECIALLY with your own anger) will not help them. These boards have its limitations. Face-to-face counseling with a competent professional is more than likely required.View Thread
Every day begins with an act of courage and hope: Getting out of bed. - Mason Cooley
understand what you were doing, but us time to let this go. this is not getting anywhere. the little cry babies and this website are worth the attention, the and i are above them. they are not worth the attentionView Thread
I am 26 now. I grew up very very sheltered. by the age of 18 I had was still a virgin and had never even made out with a boy. I had a cousin who was double my age 36. He was in the military and never in the usa. so we chatted on email and phone. I saw him like a big brother. He helped me with my homework and we talked about places he had seen. All conversations rated PG. One day he said he was gunna be close by a few towns over from me for business and I should come see him. He said the air force is having a formal party so bring a formal dress and then later we will have a movie marathon and watch all the movies your parents will not let you see. this sounded like fun so I went. He skipped the party and I don't think there ever was any movies. I ended up being SA for 2 days. It was aweful. This was the most scary thing I have every been threw. I felt scared and betrayed. then he left out of the usa again. I never told my family. I tried my best to pretend he didn't exist and nothing happened bc he was never here. But 3 years ago he moved back and I have to see him every Thanksgiving. I try to act normal in front of all my family so no one asks questions. but its hard. Im soooo scared of him and when Im there he taunts me on purpose I think he finds it amusing. Last year I sat next to my parents at the table thinking I would be safe and he sat next to me and licked his finger and stuck it in my ear. It took every oz of me not to freak out right then and there..... thanksgiving is coming up soon View Thread
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