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Sexual Abuse Survivors Support Community

Welcome to a safe environment for receiving support from other survivors of ... more

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UPSET AND CONFUSE

WE CAN'T APOLOGIZE FOR WHO WE ARE BUT TO THOSE WHO IS HURT CAUSE OF US!!!!!!!

Posted by Soulkeepers

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:************************* UPSET AND CONFUSE

Winter Storms

I hope everyone that's in the path of the big storms out east are doing okay. From the news that I've read...

Where there is shadow, there is light.

Posted by BlueRose90

17 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Winter Storms I hope everyone that's in the path of the big storms out east are doing okay. From the news that I've read...

Lurkdom Shattered.

I've been hanging around here and honestly just waiting for the activity to pick up before I wandered...

We must be the change we wish to see in the world. -- Mahatma Ghandi

Posted by lovely_lemon_tree

8 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Lurkdom Shattered. I've been hanging around here and honestly just waiting for the activity to pick up before I wandered...

coloring as therapy (triggery?)

There is no greater therapy tool than coloring. SA can leave ghoasts in your soul/head that simply can...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:coloring as therapy (triggery?) There is no greater therapy tool than coloring. SA can leave ghoasts in your soul/head that simply can...

Family, loneliness, moves

Rose, that was very brave of you and still is for living in another country. My main abuser is dead and gone,...

Posted by TNmist

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Family, loneliness, moves Rose, that was very brave of you and still is for living in another country. My main abuser is dead and gone,...

My appointment tomorrow *****TRIGGER!!****

I finally see my T tomorrow. Thankfully he called me once last week when I asked him to, and so he already has a...

Posted by TNmist

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:My appointment tomorrow *****TRIGGER!!**** I finally see my T tomorrow. Thankfully he called me once last week when I asked him to, and so he already has a...

Trying

Good Afternoon, Its been a rough week. I am feeling drained. Im trying to be good to myself. Today I went and...

Posted by AZ330

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Trying Good Afternoon, Its been a rough week. I am feeling drained. Im trying to be good to myself. Today I went and...

advice getting started with dealing and healing fr...

Hi, this is the first time that I am writing on this (or any) site. I don't really know how this works. I am...

Posted by An_250316

21 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:advice getting started with dealing and healing from childhood sexual abuse Hi, this is the first time that I am writing on this (or any) site. I don't really know how this works. I am...

wee hours

Tick-tock, tick-tock, My body says sleep, My brain says not. Elusive rest, come back, come back, To hear your...

Posted by TNmist

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:wee hours Tick-tock, tick-tock, My body says sleep, My brain says not. Elusive rest, come back, come back, To hear your...

The rest of the quote

Just wanted to share with all of you the rest of the quote from Winnie the Pooh that Caprice used. It touched my...

Posted by TNmist

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:The rest of the quote Just wanted to share with all of you the rest of the quote from Winnie the Pooh that Caprice used. It touched my...

Bad day. Just venting

It's just been a long day again today. Actually more like a series of long days. Tonight was the worst. I...

Posted by BlueRose90

15 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Bad day. Just venting It's just been a long day again today. Actually more like a series of long days. Tonight was the worst. I...

Today

Just checking in. Pretty wiped out. One minute at a time.

Posted by AZ330

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Today Just checking in. Pretty wiped out. One minute at a time.

Picture

Decided to change my picture. It looks better when viewed in the larger size on my profile. A friend took the...

Posted by TNmist

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Picture Decided to change my picture. It looks better when viewed in the larger size on my profile. A friend took the...

Just a quick shout-out to AZ and Mary

AZ, hope you are doing better today. You are in my thoughts. Mary, you are in my thoughts too, especially...

Posted by TNmist

15 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Just a quick shout-out to AZ and Mary AZ, hope you are doing better today. You are in my thoughts. Mary, you are in my thoughts too, especially...

No energy, zip, nada.

Rollercoaster week. Too much in my head. Only slept 4 hours. Fortunately it is my day off, and after a couple...

Posted by TNmist

11 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:No energy, zip, nada. Rollercoaster week. Too much in my head. Only slept 4 hours. Fortunately it is my day off, and after a couple...

â€Ž( o ) ( o ) biopsy results

***************************** ******************* *********************** **************************...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:â€Ž( o ) ( o ) biopsy results ***************************** ******************* *********************** **************************...

It's Freaking M e Out----BIG TRIGGER

Watchchamacallit Thingamajigs Soul seekers I hope that's enough room for whomever is not in a...

WE CAN'T APOLOGIZE FOR WHO WE ARE BUT TO THOSE WHO IS HURT CAUSE OF US!!!!!!!

Posted by Soulkeepers

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:It's Freaking M e Out----BIG TRIGGER Watchchamacallit Thingamajigs Soul seekers I hope that's enough room for whomever is not in a...

health update - trigger

******************************************************** ****************...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:health update - trigger ******************************************************** ****************...

facing SA - starting the healing journey

(this is another re-post of a post I did years ago. I am not altering it, it isn't addressed to anyone...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

(this is another re-post of a post I did years ago. I am not altering it, it isn't addressed to anyone in particular, its calling me to bring it forward so here it is.)

*******************************************************

I get the feeling you are not ready to embrace your "inner abused self".

that in a way you are looking for, NEEDING someone to tell you "no you weren't abused"

want... need ...perhaps praying that someone will tell you NOPE no abuse happened to you.

would that make it easier to deal with what you are dealing with? Magically give you the power to sweep it under the rug and return you to your previously scheduled program?

and on the flip side it also sounds like you need someone to confirm that you were abused, that you do not trust your own instincts.

If a student came to you and described the same info in your first post to you, what would you tell them?

You already know the answer. Your just to afraid to say it allowed.

Is it because of the stigma?

Is it because of the sense of string pulling? ie: if i tug at this little string, everything will come unravelled and fall apart and I fear that I would never get it all back together again.

Healing from SA is like leaping out of an airplane without a parachute. You just decide one moment to go for it and you leap.
Its scary as hell and you feel like you are going to fall forever, but as you face it you realize you have wings and you can fly and you will land safely.

...for some of us we are buckled in our seats on the plane and suddenly with a loud BAM the whole side of the plane rips off and we are sucked out and sent spinning through the cold air.

Others leap with the coaxing of a therapist in a tandom leap, and once the hand hold on the plane is released they plumit down fast as the weight of all the baggage they carry. The therapist helps them shed the baggage and guides them in for a smooth landing.

How ever you get set on the path to healing doesn't matter. SOMETHING in your life lead you hear and is begging for your attention.

Listen to it.

and if you really need a second opinion. (which you don't, yours is all that matters) Then yes you were abused.View Thread

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:facing SA - starting the healing journey (this is another re-post of a post I did years ago. I am not altering it, it isn't addressed to anyone...

A second one! ****TRIGGER****

***************************************************************...

Posted by TNmist

8 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:A second one! ****TRIGGER**** ***************************************************************...

Self-soothing ideas, please

I have a question for the board, please. Anyone care to post how they are able to "self-soothe" when everything...

Posted by TNmist

7 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Self-soothing ideas, please I have a question for the board, please. Anyone care to post how they are able to "self-soothe" when everything...

Support group

I would like to find a support group for grandmothers who have or are going thru her husband molesting her...

Posted by fitzfood

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Support group I would like to find a support group for grandmothers who have or are going thru her husband molesting her...

Bad time

TRIGGERED!!! TRIGGERED!!!! TRIGGERED!!!! IM SO ANGRY AND FRUSTRATED!!!! I JUST WANT TO YELL,SCREAM AND CRY. I...

Posted by AZ330

15 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Bad time TRIGGERED!!! TRIGGERED!!!! TRIGGERED!!!! IM SO ANGRY AND FRUSTRATED!!!! I JUST WANT TO YELL,SCREAM AND CRY. I...

(re-post) Birth families - Trigger

Thought this might be helpful to some of us so reposting it. Adding a trigger label because the strong...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

3 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:(re-post) Birth families - Trigger Thought this might be helpful to some of us so reposting it. Adding a trigger label because the strong...

I feel like damaged goods

I am feeling angry at myself, hurt, damaged goods, like all my work is a good progress yet slow, i want all...

Posted by SimoneSmith

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:I feel like damaged goods I am feeling angry at myself, hurt, damaged goods, like all my work is a good progress yet slow, i want all...

Today

Today is a cold rainy day....Feeling down and out today. I just feel I dont belong. I have no purpose.....

Posted by AZ330

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Today Today is a cold rainy day....Feeling down and out today. I just feel I dont belong. I have no purpose.....

Forgive and forget? I offer my perspective

I have been reading lately on a couple of our boards how some folks struggle with being Christian and "needing"...

Posted by TNmist

I have been reading lately on a couple of our boards how some folks struggle with being Christian and "needing" to forgive and forget. I offer this perspective for you: There is a verse which tells me that it would be better for someone to have a big stone placed around his/her neck and be drowned in the sea than to hurt a child. There are other verses that tell me God is the ultimate judge and will ultimately serve justice at some point down the road. To me, forgiving someone simply releases the urge for vengence on my part and allows me to move forward in life because God has my back, and He will take care of any justice issues in the end.

As for "forgetting," I don't believe we are meant to forget that someone (or many!) are not safe to be around and/or are not safe to have our children be alone with, etc. For example, say someone who stole from you in the past now moves in next door to you. He or she asks for forgiveness of his or her past deeds and claims to be a changed person. You may forgive their past, but a wise person will still have locks on their doors and some sort of security system in place, at least until this person's current actions and lifestyle make it clear to you that he or she has, indeed, changed and is no longer a thief.

Forgetting doesn't mean that we are supposed to be vulnerable to more harm in our lives. If someone comes to me and asks for forgiveness about harming me in the past, that doesn't mean our relationship is instantly repaired. If someone is truly sorry for their actions, I will know by their actions moving forward.

Ultimately, at the end of time, God will only save those who are safe to save in his kingdom. That means, in heaven (and in the New Earth eventually), ALL my neighbors will be perfectly safe (not to mention that I will be safe to live around, too), and no locks will be needed. Hurray.

I hope that helps in some way. I don't want to turn this into any sort of spiritual debate or anything; I'm just offering my perspective.

Peace of heart to you,

-MistyView Thread

Posted by TNmist

1 Reply | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Forgive and forget? I offer my perspective I have been reading lately on a couple of our boards how some folks struggle with being Christian and "needing"...

Weepy day

Decided to take a "mental health day" and not work today. Woke up all weepy and out of sorts and just didn't...

Posted by TNmist

2 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Weepy day Decided to take a "mental health day" and not work today. Woke up all weepy and out of sorts and just didn't...

Trigger...uuugh taking care of my health.

*************************************** ********* ****************************************** *******...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

4 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Trigger...uuugh taking care of my health. *************************************** ********* ****************************************** *******...

Still Very Angry - Triggers

My sister was molested by an older cousin for years. When my parents found out, my father beat my sister and...

Posted by An_250023

My sister was molested by an older cousin for years. When my parents found out, my father beat my sister and screamed at her and called her terrible, awful names not worth repeating. I would credit that moment with the moment I lost my childhood. And I would relive that moment every day until my early twenties; a good ten years or so. PTST? Nobody in my family talked about the sexual abuse after that. It was like it didn't happen, like a dream, but it most certainly was not. Nobody in my family went to counseling.
My sister started cutting herself and acting out sexually, but again, nobody talked about it. We stopped going to extended family gatherings because my dad refused to take us there. I am grateful for that, but the rest of our family acted like nothing happened even though this cousin molested several other cousins and his own siblings. Still, nobody did a thing. I am angry at the lack of action. None of the adults did anything to help any of us and they had the power to do so. How could they let all of us down like that? I makes me sick to my stomach to think about it.
We are all adults now and still nobody talks about it. It's the big sexual abuse secret that everybody is trying to protect. They want to keep it between the family, but I can't keep quiet about it anymore. It's stressful and just plain wrong! I am angry and have major trust issues. Recently, I found out that my mom was molested by her brother. Obviously, the sexual abuse in my family is generational. I have pulled myself away from my extended family to keep myself safe, but I sometimes feel very alone even though I am married and have children. I don't have many people to talk to about this and I feel like I'm the only one going through this although I'm sure I'm not.
I am still very angry about the events that transpired and how my extended family treated my sister, how they treated us. I don't want anything to do with them, but I sometimes get badgered by my extended family or my parents to attend family gatherings and I don't understand them.
My parents didn't protect my sister or the rest of us and even though they acknowledge the bad job they did with the sexual abuse, they do not acknowledge how physically and emotionally abusive they were to my siblings and I. I don't trust them. I often ask myself how could they could love us and still treat us/let this happen? Will there ever be a point where I'm at peace? I know they cannot give me what I am looking for (a loving, compassionate, caring family), but I have a hard time giving up hope. Any ideas on how to cope with something like this?
View Thread

Posted byAn_250023

12 Replies | Reply | Watch This Discussion Report This | Share this:Still Very Angry - Triggers My sister was molested by an older cousin for years. When my parents found out, my father beat my sister and...

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