I had always been asked if I had been molested and always answered no. Then, after a hysterectomy at 36, I was once again asked, only this time I shocked myself and said, in tears, yes. After that incident, I began having what I call "Kodak moments." I would have snapshots of memories with no rhyme nor reason. As the years went on, the snapshots became clearer and I realized exactly what had been done to me beginning at the age of eight. I still don't know all of the details, but I know enough. I've tried to forgive but following the physical and mental problems associated with this event, I find myself frequently angry. So many problems and none of them necessary. Bipolar, substance abuse of prescription meds, migraines, ibd, female problems, back problems, throat problems, stomach problems and then the sex problems, no feeling from the waist down, no sex drive, no desire. Sometimes it makes me really mad that along with my childhood, that was taken from me, too. I want to rant what more do I have to suffer, then I remember that I'm not the only one and that many suffer worse fates than mine. At times I can talk about this and be ok, but at other times I hurt and cry. Can't write anymore now. DebbieView Thread
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