That's real good for your friend if it works for her,being integrated.It's sad about what you went through that lead you here.Don't ever apologize to me for anything cause I'm no one to apologize too.
Having any mental illness stinks really bad and people will tell you what you want to hear at that moment.Whatever in order for you not to do whatever it is that you want to do.But if someone wants to do something then that person is going to do it.
People feed each other lines back and forth.In case you haven't heard we are the basket full of nuts over here.The kind where others use caution when approaching or dealing with.We stay flipping and I think that is what cause people to stay away.
Here's the deal with us and it's my fault I guess.
We are talked at and not talked to.
We come with a lot of BS so we're tolerated.
Listen too but not heard
sympathized with but out of pity
Have done good things but never acknowledge
Judged by some when they don't have a heaven or hell to put anyone in.
Being told don't stay in the dark cause it weighs heavy on you presses you down and it replaces contentment with loneliness..Yet that's what others are doing when one minute they are there and then the next gone.You are left with loneliness and after a while even when it's cold the darkness gives you warmth and comfort.
So I don't think there's any kind of pain anyone can conflict on me that will hurt.And I have myself to thank for all of it so everyone else can release their self of any wrong doing if there's any.So with all of that said I can officially be out of here.
I feel some type of way about this connection.I'm not direct with my words because what's going I haven't read or did anyone mentioned it.So I'm not going to put myself out there for smeone just to listen
It's raining and for the first time in a long time I'm grateful.It's relaxing and calming reminds me of a melody.Wrestling with some feelings right which I hate to the point of wanting to fight.
I feel like they are mines but then again feel like they have nothing to do with me.Like being connected to something else that I'm not comfortable with.
This whole situation with this other person is really peeling back the layers of my anger forcing out some rage.Don't have to work but the boss wants to have a meeting with us and anything can happen.Don't want to get into details of what happen right now.
Maybe I'll share some of it when I return from my meeting.
Just in the aggravation phrase and need to get this out.DON'T NEED ANY COMMENTS.I believe of going to right to the source and not to anyone else.
My anger is full of emotions and I'm tired of playing pin-the-on me.Right now I'm trying to put the conversation out of my mind but it's been laid out for tonight.Don't remember how the topic came up at work but I had to say what was in my heart cause it was paining me.On hand I figured W made those statements cause they have never been in that position before and then on that same note words of such shouldn't leave her brain.
Work is a place of business and there are certain things that shouldn't be talked about.I try to stay away from others who like to talk but this conversation,I was closer than I needed to be.A few statements were made that got my attention.It was hard to get through but the more I thought about it,it made me angry.I know that what this person said shouldn't get to us like that but on that same note it hit to close to home.
Got into an argument with this for the things they said and I strongly suggested that you shouldn't talk about something you know nothing about.They were making light of the of people who are being/have been abused.
A person have been abused only claim that after the accuser wants nothing else to do with them.
Don't dress like a hoe if you don't want to be treated like one.
people don't get rape,it's just two people engaging in rough sex.
If a woman calls rape or claim to have been abuse they should be ashamed of themselves.
Others go around lying on innocent people for attention.
At that moment felt like fifty devils jumped inside of me.I had to ask this question cause I couldn't keep it in.What about the sweet innocent kids that get hurt by someone abusing them?
This person response was,well kids have a wild imagination and they are always making up stories.They have a hard time with what's real or not to them.You can't believe what a child said or say about someone.I got so emotionally but I had to fight to hold them back and with everything I had in me.I asked her have she ever been abused ? She said NO and I walked away.Because her thoughts were played by being arrogant.View Thread
MAKE EVERY YESTERDAY A DREAM OF HOPE AND TOMORROW A DREAM OF HAPPINESS!!!!!!!
Having a internal conversation cause we seem to be on the same page at the moment.And are the only ones that can tolerate ourselves when no one else can.Most times it's like I'll tolerate you long enough to hear what you have to say but don't give a flip about how you really feel or what cause you to feel that way.
we have created a safe place here to speak right?
Quis i don't think this is the place or the time
Quiet okay if not now then when?
Well what about never and a day
alright the idea of this is to share something one doesn't know about the other.I'll give you something that's not to difficult to speak/write about.The rest of the gang knows of this but not you cause you turned on the deaf ear.I'll give you the short version of it cause it's real late and we need some sleep.
The system knows about J but what you don't know is he wasn't the first one and because of the incident that happen I associate myself with an animal. Also the reason for the tearful and sleepless nights,reaching for alcohol and everything else.I still carry personal shame,pressing pressure and pain.Doing those things keeps the body from screaming but at the same time traumatizing the body by my own actions.With the secrecy and denial surrounding this but when that card was place on the car by you know who that cause it to be brought up again.
Okay the first one I wasn't that far along when the mom found out and she had time to do something about it.No one knew and I never told anyone anything cause I knew to keep my mouth shut or else.I was giving something to drink but don't know what.We waited for a while and then I had then worst pain going through me that I couldn't explain. Freaking out as to not knowing what was going on or what was about to happen.A little while after that I went to the bath room and I thought I had to go but that wasn't it.
I felt something and starting screaming.She ran in and told me to shut up before he hears me.Never saw or felt anything like it before in my life.After the drop I got and made the mistake of looking back and I just fell to the floor.This crazy woman scooped it out and started yelling at me saying YOU SEE WHAT YOU DID........GOD IS NOT HAPPY WITH YOU OR THIS AND YOU'RE GOING TO HELL FOR IT..............Here I am laid out on the floor and all she can do is hollar at me about something I can't wrap my mind around.Thinking to myself when is this s*** gonna end wishing I would just die to get away.Confuse as I stare up at her wondering why and how she could do that.
Now QUIET AND ALL there's a lot between here and there.But what this witch did after is to disturbing even for me and I don't think y'all can stomach it without tossing your cookies.Maybe a little later and you can share something as well.When I say these people is as evil as they come I truly whole heartly stress that.I said I was gonna give the short but didn't but had a lot to say.I apologize and it's two am so let's get some sleep and start fresh.
"THE SAME STRENGTH THAT IT TOOK TO TAKE IT,IS THE SAME AMOUNT OF STRENGTH THAT IT TAKES TO LET IT GO".
Q & Q AND THE REST OF SOULKEEPERS...........View Thread
Crying Is Like Taking Your Soul To The Laundry Mat!!!!!!!