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Sexual Abuse Survivors Support Community

Welcome to a safe environment for receiving support from other survivors of ... more

Reply: I need a boat ride

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

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Reply: I need a boat ride

- Repost Caprice posted this on the self injury board 4 months ago before she was ...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

11 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:I need a boat ride - Repost Caprice posted this on the self injury board 4 months ago before she was ...

Reply: Tired of the inner battle

********************************** *********************************...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

********************************** ********************************* ***************** possible triggering conversation *************

You: Yesterday I started a post and as I was writing, I cried and cried. I then hit delete instead of post. I was a fraid of what people would think of me for being in downer mode

This board is for all of us. Not just those who are healed. We are all in different places in our healing journey.

If you are down, be down, don't slap on a happy face to please us. This board is one place you can be real, honest and who you are.

There is no need to apologies or worry about bringing others down. Do you know that reaching out to help others who are hurting is healing for others? To be able to offer the love and compassion many were denied in childhood to others is healing.

You: Why do I want to be heard? Why is it so important to feel as though I am understood.

Because you need validation. You need the simple curtisy of being seen. You are worth being seen and heard. Because you have been backed into a corner and you are ready to come out swinging, but you don't know how. You don't know how to speak up for yourself.

How long as it been since you had a physical done? If you are in the postmenopausal range you could be having the extra added hormonal fluctuation to further make life choppy for you.

Sometimes finding peace means looking at all the whole picture not just the symptoms. Are you eating healthy? getting some exercise, enjoying hobbies...etc. Are you living or just existing?

You are ready to stop running and start healing. You know that don't you? The very fact that you are here and reaching out says, I am done, running, I am ready to stand my ground and change things for me.

Good for you.

We are all our own worse enemies. No one knows you like you do. You will befriend her in time. That anger and chaos in your head can be refocused into a powerful healing tool. And you will save that woman you see in the mirror.View Thread

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted byDOGDANCING_TCOS

5 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:Tired of the inner battle ********************************** *********************************...

Reply: am I losing my mind....please help

************************ ******************************* ****************...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

************************ ******************************* **************** ***************** triggering conversation **************************

welcome to the board, Glad you found us. So sorry you have need to be here.

As I read through this thread one thing kept coming up.

the need to tell you, whoa!!

You sound like a run away horse galloping hellbent this way and that way lathered up and deathly afraid of slowing down or stopping.

I am not going to advice you to slow down, heck I am going to advice you to STOP. Just stop. Stand still for a moment and don't move.

Your life sounds like it is revolving around your at lightspeed.

that you are running so fast...in an attempt to outrun the past, outrun the emotions, out run it all.

STOP.

Take a deep breath.

Use this board as a hitching post to latch onto and get grounded and refocused.

You are trying to out run the monsters from your childhood and your daughters childhood, and now your grand childs.

Has no one told you, you can't out run this. The way you deal with it is to STOP - hold your ground and face it. You will never get your power back while you are fleeing.

You get it back by stopping, drawing a line in the sand with a stick then shouldering the stick and threatening anything that comes over the line with a whack to the head.

First rule of saving a drowning person is.....don't be drowning next to them.

You will not be able to effectively help daughter/grand etc if you - yourself have not reached a stable level in your own healing.

heh, sorry...guess I should introduce myself. I am Paja. Known big mouth on the board. You can ignore me if you want. I am not one to smile and pat you on the head, I am one that will play hard ball with you.

One thing to think about..

you said: My daughter brought it to his attention at first he denied and said it had a mind of it's own and when he was playing his daughter was bouncing or brushing up against it. He was ashamed and embarrassed.

men get erections for all dumb sorts of things. HE DID THE RIGHT THING. He removed himself from the situation. He was ashamed and embarrassed.

I have a daughter and let me tell you, i DID NOT WANT A DAUGHTER, for the very reason of not wanting to face the father/daughter dynamics.

It triggered me IMMENSELY. It changed my relationship with my husband and my son. Now they were viewed as potential abusers, vs father and brother.

It is a fiiiiiine line between protecting G-daughter and ruining her relationship with her father. Girls need a healthy good father role model. You can damage that by making her afraid of him.

I had several conversations with my hubby on this subject. So he knew EVERTHING he did with his daughter is a trigger to me. I helped him learn boundaries. (rather then sitting on his lap, she would sit next to him) etc.

again, welcome to the board, glad you found us. I hope you find what we all have found here. A wonderful place to come and be heard and speak thoughts aloud with others who understand.

Peace be the journey

Paja

View Thread

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted byDOGDANCING_TCOS

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Reply: I need a boat ride

.* the boat suddenly pulls hard of port as I climb from the sea on board* In my...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

11 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:I need a boat ride .* the boat suddenly pulls hard of port as I climb from the sea on board* In my...

Reply: Suspect

oh Az.....(((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs you))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) you have...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

15 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:Suspect oh Az.....(((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs you))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) you have...

Reply: Surviving Trauma and Writing to Heal

welcome to the board, glad you found us. Going public with these issues can be...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

9 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:Surviving Trauma and Writing to Heal welcome to the board, glad you found us. Going public with these issues can be...

Reply: dissociate

Sorry for the delayed response, had a very bad downward cycle of my mental health...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

Sorry for the delayed response, had a very bad downward cycle of my mental health due to my thyroid being under-medicated. Feeling better now.

Grounding techniques.

What works for me is to get into a routine. Initially I would start my day with a set of them. To orient me right off. Then as time passed I only needed to do them when necessary. Kinda like re-training my body/brain.

Grounding techniques can be triggering - use caution /a have a back up plan if you get triggered. There designed to keep you in the moment...the moment you are actively running from.

Can be done anywhere:

go to bathroom, hold wrists under cold running water. Deep slow breaths. Focus on the water. After a say 20 deep breaths place your wet hands around your neck and look into your eyes in the mirror. (this can be difficult if you never look yourself in the eyes, might take some practice)

Carry a anchor. It can be a polished rock, (I carry a piece of malachite) a small totem, chess piece, checker, toy, monopoly, etc. When your need to "stay put" pull it out and roll it about your hand/squeeze it/look at it and mentally repeat something like "Stay here, Stay put" (I use SIT UBOO...heehee it makes me laugh which has the extra benifit of calming me and helping me to see it okay and easing the tension that is making me want to run.)

SRH, WAYG?SH! = writing notes to your self on papers. I used this all through high school. When I felt my self drifting off, I would scrawl on the margins of my paper or cover of my note books...SRH (stay right here) WAYG?SH! (where are you going? stay here!) but most often found on my papers is this one....BYS....LOL (Behave your selfs)

At home:

Face off - stare yourself down. Till you stop looking through yourself and the inner chatter of (ew I am fat, old, wrinkly, pimply gross, etc) stops and you are simply left in silence to look at yourself. Then sup your face and say. Hello ____.

Do a morning round up. (can be very triggering) Before you get dressed, run your hand down each extremity and focus on the skin on skin. Verbally chatter while doing this, "morning arm, hello hand. Glad you are connected to me, nice to see you today". Do your whole body.

After a morning round up, do a battle cry. "Legs! arms! you too belly! We are off to start the day, TOO TALLO HETOOHEY!!!" or "FORWARD THE EGGS!", make up your own battle cry. Which can be used also as a verbal/mental reminder anywhere at anytime you feel yourself drifting off.

Living in the moment is difficult once you master the art of dissociation. It takes practice to not just automatically slip into that head space. Allow yourself time to learn, practice and find what helps you.

Peace be the journey.View Thread

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted byDOGDANCING_TCOS

9 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:dissociate Sorry for the delayed response, had a very bad downward cycle of my mental health...

Reply: dissociate

I was diagnosed with (DID) dissociative identity disorder (formally known as...

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

9 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:dissociate I was diagnosed with (DID) dissociative identity disorder (formally known as...

Reply: Different part *****may be trigger*****

yup, know of what you speak.

I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.

Posted by DOGDANCING_TCOS

8 Replies | Reply | Watch This DiscussionReport This| Share this:Different part *****may be trigger***** yup, know of what you speak.

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