Joined: 07/25/2012
My Story:
I was diagnosed with HPV 9 years ago at 19 years old. I was in, what was at least on my side, a monogamous relationship with my first sexual partner and we stopped using condoms after I went on birth control. I thought I had done my due diligence and that I could trust him when I asked if he had anything and he said no. I thought he wouldn't like me if I asked him to get tested. My friends all made it seem like sex was no big deal, like nothing bad could happen. How naive! A year later when I broke up with the same guy at 20, and hadn't had relations with anyone else, I was diagnosed with HSV 2. I hadn't expected a parting gift.

I allowed myself to be a victim for years. How could he do this to me? Why didn't my parents stop me from dating this loser guy? Why had my friends given me bad advice? What did I do to deserve this lot? Blah Blah Blah. Blaming everyone else, taking no responsibility for my own actions and not just accepting the reality that sometimes bad things happen to good people.

As a single 28 year old woman I finally decided to empower myself by collecting as much information about my diagnoses as possible. Better to do this while I'm alone than back pedaling in a new relationship. A lot of my negative associations with herpes were caused by my own thoughts, never mind the societal stigmas. One night I Googled "Latest research on genital herpes" and found this website. How amazing to anonymously be able to read the stories of others and share insight. How awesome to not feel alone!

I also read Terri Warren's The Good News about the Bad News and The Herpes Handbook online Both offer reliable information and a more positive way to view herpes. It's comforting to know that there are more people with herpes than either diabetes or high blood pressure. Why do you know who has diabetes and high blood pressure? Because they tell you. Why don't people talk about herpes if it's so common? The same reason I don't run around telling the whole free world unless it's under a false moniker...because I'm afraid people will look at me differently because they don't know they shouldn't.

While having herpes isn't something I ever imagined I would be dealing with, now I'm better equipped. I can see that everyone has baggage and the right man will be able to see past mine and know that the list of my positive attributes vastly outweighs the negatives.

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Reply: Dating a man who has GHSV1
I would recommend reading Terri Warren's book The Good News About the Bad News and The...More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Reply: My partner was diagnosed with Herpes 2 right after...
I would recommend that you and your boyfriend read Terri Warren's book The Good News...More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Reply: BF left me after..
Terri Warren's book The Good News About the Bad News has a whole chapter on how to have...More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Reply: Guidance please
I felt like trash when I first got diagnosed with HSV2 too and for several years after....More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Reply: Advice on HSV-2 and my GF
I have had HSV 2 for about 8 years and have learned that many doctors are misinformed...More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Reply: hsv 2
Give yourself some time to process this. I highly recommend reading "The Good News...More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Reply: Advice on HSV-2 and my GF
As a woman who has had HSV 2 for 8 years, I have come to learn that most doctors aren't...More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Reply: Just Diagnosed with HSV-2
You are NOT an idiot. Things like this happen to all sorts of people. I promise you it...More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Oral sex with HSV2 and HPV. No go, right?
Years ago I saw an episode of Private Practice (2X19 What Women Want) where a male...More
Posted by LadyRunner6
Reply: New to having HSV-2
You're not alone in being frustrated about this diagnosis so soon after becoming...More
Posted by LadyRunner6