I got herpes 28 years ago from the woman I lived with. She denied having it, but there is no other way I could have got it. Makes sense now why she used a diaphragm. I got the herpes after we had sex during her period.
Anyhow, I have had to tell 3 people in the ensuing years, each before we began having sex. One of them married me anyway, then divorced me [unrelated to herpes>. She was not infected, but the other gal was, when a condom fell off inside her.
For me, herpes is just an annoyance. The outbreaks less frequent over the years. Just be honest with and try to protect your partner. Get your partner into the doc for herpes vaccination. The guy who gave it to you — forget him or sue him. I don't see that forgiving him is worthwhile. But don't ever see him again, or your problems are beyond herpes. And don't be ashamed, it was the weasel's fault who, without disclosure, gave them to you.
The hard part is telling partners and potential partners. Now that there is a vaccine, help your partner get one. If you have any specific questions, let me know. I think it is probably a much different experience for a woman than a man.