We really can't add anything more than what you physician told you.
You had protected sex with someone and then continued on to provide unprotected oral sex on her. It almost sounds as if you had an allergic reaction to the condom and picked this up orally which might explain the redness and tiny blisters on your penis and the discomfort on your tongue.
At any rate, if your partner has HSV in her oral cavity, you providing oral sex to her would not transmit this virus to you (wrong end of the body). Now kissing possibly might but it would not cause the body symptoms you describe.
"So it mean the therapist who massage and handjob me if she before massage and handjob me, she massage and handjob another customer who infected STD, than after she finish with the infected STD customer, than after 15 minute the receptionist told me that my room ready then she came to my room and she start massage and hand job me without condom, can i be infected STD ?"
Now you're consumed with guilt, have read all the symptoms about HIV on the internet and have convinced yourself that your punishment is that you must now have this disease.
Even assuming this woman was HIV positive the virus cannot cross an intact latex condom.
Your wife is quite correct in her diagnosis that all of your "symptoms" are due to anxiety and guilt and not due to HIV. She's a smart cookie.
Go take an HIV screening test (you can do home testing). Your test result will be negative. Please understand there is no MEDICAL need for the test but perhaps that nice big NEGATIVE test result will help you tremendously with all this anxiety you are going through over this massage event.