I'm serious about this. Whether you're male or female, have you ever seen a man who has an erection that's 3" or less? It's called a micropenis, and it's very rare. Anyone here ever seen one?View Thread
Hi 162, This info changes things a bit. I thought you were married to him and together a long time. The way you worded the last post I'm not even sure you live with him. What that means is how can you be sure he really has ED. A LOT of things effect a man's ability to get an erection. His emotional state of mind can cause even a young man to not get erect, much more so when he is older. I'm not going to presume to know what you should do. But I'll tell you this. After reaching 50 and beyond it gets harder to fall in love and to even form the kinds of intense relationships that come so easy when we're young. I mean for you and him.
If he would go to a Doc and tell him he's experiencing ED, chances are the only tests the Doc will do is check his blood for diabetes and low testosterone. The Doc will check his blood pressure and feel if his prostate gland is enlarged. If all that is normal the Doc will probably offer him Viagra. If he refuses it the Doc may ask why. Or he may refer him to some sort of specialist. But being in good health and refusing Viagra may make the Doc think he doesn't care about getting erections. If he's a busy Doc with many patients, he doesn't have time to try and find out why, or he may see it as not his job. What I'm saying is Viagra is a very successful drug. If a healthy man won't even try it, there can be so many reasons that unless the Doc has known him a long time, I doubt he will pursue it.
I'm thinking this man feels ambiguous about you or his life, or something. If you leave he'll be alone, and I personally hate being alone. I'll bet he's afraid to even ask a Doc why he's getting ED. He may even be afraid Viagra won't work. I think you should consider speaking to a counselor about this issue, and if the counselor seems god, maybe your man can eventually come with you and you can discuss this with the counselor. If the man won't discuss this at all, you're at a dead end. How can anyone help if he won't talk. I don't know.View Thread
Now that you said this, you gave me an idea. Is this man the same bad partner you raised the kids with? Maybe he's getting back at you. I heard of that before. I've been assuming you have a good marriage. But if he's unhappy with you because of no sex when he was younger, maybe that's why he tells you he has ED.View Thread
162, You two aren't that old. I was wondering if you two were 70. But I've read here where even couples in their 70's still enjoy sex.
You have 2 problems. One is ED, and I don't know why he has that. Heck, I don't even know why I have it. The most common reason is poor blood flow to the penis. But I heard of 1 man who had plenty of blood going down there, but it wouldn't stay there. I read that 1 artery brings blood down, and 6 veins take it away after the man cums. The 6 veins have 1 way valves that should stay closed until sex is over. This 1 man had defective valves and a surgeon had to replace them. We are truly wondrously made.
Docs diagnose things things by doing tests, or trying a certain med. With ED Docs prefer to try a med, and if it works, the problem is blood flow.
Your big problem is getting your husband to discuss this with you and the Doc. Has he been for a thorough check up recently, including a blood test for diabetes? Diabetes is anther big reason for ED. If you can go to the Doc with him, and if he doesn't mention ED, maybe you can mention it. Ten the Doc can check for diabetes, and he will probably want to give him Viagra. If your husband refuses Viagra the Doc will ask why? But the Doc can also check his BP. If it's high, that can also cause ED.
Another thing the Doc can check s his Testosterone levels. Low Testosterone can cause ED and loss of interest in sex. But not always. I have low Testosterone, and I would still want sex if I was married. Even if I couldn't cum, I'd still pleasure my wife, and I'd want her to use her hand and mouth. Plus I'd still want cuddling. I've tried Testosterone replacement and it makes me depressed. That's rare, but it happens to me.
So your major problem is getting your husband to deal with this. That's #1.
But you said you want intercourse after you cum by his mouth. I'm sure he knows that. Can you be happy without it? If you can, you have to tell him that. I think your choice may be no sex at all. Or oral sex, but no intercourse. He may be able to get 1/2 erect, but not enough for penetration. Isn't oral sex better than none at all? If you were in your 20's or 30's I could see where you must have intercourse. That's why I stayed single. You're proving I was right.
So... If his Testosterone is low and the Doc can get it up, his interest in sex may return, but ED may stay and there's no intercourse, but he'll enjoy sex again. If he'll take Viagra and you can get him hard, you can have intercourse again. Btw, Viagra doesn't cause an instant erection. You have to work on it. Viagra works best on an empty stomach, and you 2 may be surprised because many men wake up with an erection. That's a bonus.
But you have to get him to discuss this. OK?View Thread
I'm not married nor do I have a gf, but if I did, I'd love getting her to cum with my hands and mouth. It would stimulate me mentally, but without Viagra there would be no erection. Viagra only works if a lack of blood flow is the problem, and it usually is.
Since that's true, gravity is an erection's best friend. For example, if I lay on my back, even Viagra won't work. Standing up is best.
Will he let you fondle his penis in your hand? If so, try and be standing up. Maybe kiss him and back him against a wall, and fondle. Sitting is 2nd best, but it depends on if his body weight in against his prostate gland. I think it's better if it is, but you can't know that.
Maybe he read a few men went blind from Viagra? They did, but my Doc said it's super rare. He has a better chance of falling out of an airplane, than going blind from Viagra. They're also very expensive. Last time I bought a large Tab (100 mg) it cost $19.00. So much for sex is the most fun you can have for free. But maybe he'd only need 50 mg. Some Docs still have samples. But you have to ask for them.
Can I ask how old he is? Does he smoke and/or drink? Both cause ED, especially tobacco. He's obviously the kind of man who no longer feels like a man because he can't get hard. I'm an atypical man because I can discuss all this. Most men can't. But if you 2 are still young he needs to talk about it, wit his Doc, if not you, and do something.
What he's doing is typical. He's pretending he has no interest in sex anymore. He does. He has to admit it to himself.
I have to tell you something. This isn't about you, it's about him. It's not how he feels about you, it's how he feels about him. And sex makes him hate himself. I'd really like to know your ages? A I said, I met ED at 40. That was very young. But it happens.View Thread
Can he take Viagra, Levitra or Cialis? I got the best results with Viagra. I even woke up with a partial erection. Levitra didn't work as well, and all I got from Cialis was a 3 day headache. Not an erection. I should tell you I used those drugs alone, just to see if they would work. I also noticed I need 100 mg of Viagra, so that's 2 reg sized pills or 1 extra strength. Even with these pills, you don't get an automatic erection. You need stimulation, and both physical and emotional works best. Or so I'm told.
If he can't take these drugs due to taking Nitrates for his heart, he may never be able to get hard enough for penetration. Would you still want sex then? You implied you would. Tell him. Even though he can't get fully erect, he should still enjoy your hands and mouth. He may even still cum. ED is such a strange illness. My cousin married a man like your husband, and she was shocked to learn he still enjoyed oral sex with her.
Half the battle is in his head. He feels belittled because he can't get erect. If you can settle for no intercourse at all, then you have to tell him. Maybe you have to tell him 100 times. You have to find a way to convince him.
If you won't settle for no Intercourse, then you wouldn't have liked me. Even when I was young. In fact, you're proving I was right. Women want Intercourse, even if they don't cum that way. They want it. And I didn't have length nor girth.
So this this birth defect caused me to become a lonely old man. I want to make the medical profession aware of this before I die.
Docs do thousands of breast implants, and many men love small breasts. I do. To me more than a B cup not necessary, and if it's an implant, I don't even like it. But breasts aren't necessary for intercourse. The penis is.
So I hope some Docs see this. There has to be a cure, considering we can no manipulate a baby's genes. When I was born, nothing could be done. They didn't even know what DNA was back then. Now they do. This runs in the family. If I made a woman pregnant today I would want the Docs to make sure the baby doesn't get this gene. It's a nightmare.
Unless we go back to God's ways and a woman only has sex with her husband, and she only has 1 husband, mostly anyway.
I hope you convince your husband to have oral sex with you, 162. He probably still wants to.View Thread
I think your husband has a hang up. I developed a rash on my penis at 38. It spread to my legs and lower belly. I had it about 4 years and 6 different Docs didn't know what it was. When it finally went away it left me with partial ED. As I got older the ED got worse. But I learned something. Just because I can't get erect, I still have a sexual desire. Can he use Viagra? I have a heart problem so I haven't taken Viagra in 5 years, but it used to work pretty good.
I'm also very good with my fingers and my mouth. And I enjoy doing it. But it's hard to do that if I just met a woman.
I think a lot of women may know intercourse isn't a big deal once they're in their mid 40's. But in their 20's I think they want intercourse, and they want to enjoy it. I couldn't do that.
And then in the 1980's we had AIDES, and other STD's hit epidemic proportions. That made oral sex very dangerous. I also became very religious at 30. From that point on I wanted to get married, or at least I wanted to be in love to have sex. I think I would have been that way even if I was normal. But in my 20's I would have had sex with many more girls than I did, if I was normal.
Most of my life this wasn't even considered a medical problem, and it is. At least now it has a name, Microphallus. I think the medical community should try and find a way to detect this before a boy is born, and treat it. It's not funny, and all people do is laugh at it. But it's not funny at all.View Thread
I don't know what you mean by "about that small". Maybe you're 4" or a little better. Or maybe you met 1 of the few women who wouldn't care. I know there are a small group of women who don't care. I also know as women get older they don't care because other things are more important. I wasn't as lucky as you to have met them. There's also a female version of this condition which is almost impossible to know. I also know at my age that some women feel pain if a penis is larger than 6". This condition is part of a syndrome, and I forget the name of it. But I could never get a circ because of this. That made me prone to yeast infections like women are. It also causes big man boobs. Finally, it causes sinus problems and frequent nose bleeds.
But I'll say again you were lucky to meet a woman who didn't care. God blessed you.View Thread