Skip to content


    Attention All WebMD Community Members:

    These message boards are closed to posting. Please head on over to our new WebMD Message Boards to check out and participate in the great conversations taking place:

    A Positive Influence: Pay It Forward
    Olivia_WebMD_Staff posted:
    This came from a suggestion from Rachael67 to have a more positive discussion for this community now and then. I think we'll try to use this "Pay It Forward" theme at least once a month from now on, so if you have specific ideas for it, toss them in the Suggestion thread.

    Name one positive thing (and the circumstances) which you have learned directly or indirectly from another person that has helped you and which you continue to implement in your life on a regular basis.
    jenna291 responded:
    A positive thing for me has been the incredibly wonderful and brave women I have met and continue to meet thru this ordeal. It is a bond like no other. A good friend and myself who had been down this road 2 years before I did started a support group and we meet once a month and share stories, and just find comfort in each other's company.
    I have become more "in tune" to the needs of others after having gone thru chemo. I "just do" things for people now, and don't ask. People sometimes don't know what to tell you to help, but so appreciate any gesture, a card, a phone call, a meal.
    Its important not to loose touch with those going thru this whole thing. It helps! I don't think I would have realized this before.

    best ~
    rohvannyn replied to jenna291's response:
    I like this topic idea.

    One of the most valuable things I have ever learned is a love of learning. Wanting to know how things work and what things are, and the ability to find out, is a learned skill and the most valuable thing anyone ever taught me. I learned it from parents with a love of learning (my dad read my articles on rocketry to me as a baby) and teachers with the same. I was blessed with a non traditional education and it did me a world of good. I still didn't like some aspects of learning, such as math problems, but I love theory.

    My best friend is the internet! All that information, at my fingertips! It's tremendously empowering.
    1dazygal responded:
    When I was a child my mother always would read to me. It opened up a world of imagination that is still with me.

    As I got a little older we went and got my first library card. I picked out so many books she made me put half back.

    At age 7 she gave me an auto biography to read and then I would write a report on it. We moved up to different cultures in the world and this practice developed my love of different places and people and history. I should include acceptance in that sentence.

    When I went into high school I was able to interact with all the groups (etc the druggies). It enriched my life and continues to this day. I love to study people and places.

    I continued the process with my daughter who grew up and traveled the world as a model for Elite. She also was ready for different lifestyles.

    My favorite book was one put out on the white house after JFK was president and Jackie revamped the inside. My lifelong dream was to visit the White House. I was thrilled when I finally made the trip in my 20's.

    Thanks mommie. Still miss you daily
    abnersmom responded:
    I have been keeping a gratitude journal off and on for years, but I recently heard someone talk about also/instead write down what was the happiest moment of your day. I have been doing that the last couple of nights and it has been quite enlightening. If you asked me what brings me joy, I probably wouldn't have said either of the things I was doing during the happiest moments in the last couple of days. I love learning more about myself.
    jankearney123 replied to abnersmom's response:
    Years and years ago before it became popular (i don't know how this came to me) but I would leave lucky pennies in the grocery store car parking lot. This was before doing random acts of kindness became popular because it was some 30 years ago. For 5 years i played secret santa and only my husband new. 2 of the families were my own but the others were just people we had heard of from others and so on xmas ever at 1 or 2 a.m. i would drive myself over and put a black sack of goodies (just what i figured they would like and could use). I'm sad that i can barely keep my head above water now.
    bobby75703 responded:
    My Dad who is now deceased. Some of his wise sayings. This one stayed with me for life and taught me to go over everything with a fine tooth comb.

    " The big print giveth, and the small print taketh."

    I can't tell ya how many times that simple phrase saved me. Thanks Dad. I miss you.
    rachael67 responded:
    Long ago I learned a lesson from Loretta Young!

    (For those of you who are much younger than I ~this might now include about 98% of the population!~ Loretta Young was quite a prominent actress both in film and on tv. At the time she was known not only for her talents, but also for her wholesome lifestyle...something which as the years have passed, we have learned might not have been quite as pristine as we'd have thought ...but that's another story, right?!)

    Her autobiography was on sale at the bookstore and, since I enjoyed her work, I bought it. As I recall, it was not necessarily a brilliant work of literature, but I did enjoy reading it. It was entitled The Things I Had To Learn. I can't remember exactly just how she had put it, but I was quite impressed with her approach to making sure that you always say "Thank you."

    All these years after, this continues to be an important issue for me. Whether I ask someone for something or not, if they are kind enough to put me in their thoughts by either doing for me or giving to me, the very least I can do is make sure they know I appreciated their efforts. I'd never want anyone to feel that I took them for granted.

    Ah! Whoda thunk I'd still remember it was a movie star who helped me learn one of her lessons!?

    minicheezburg responded:
    Every thing happens for a reason. After my loss someone said this to me. I belive it. After many different things we have been through.
    An_241298 replied to rachael67's response:
    Have to agree with you on this simple concept. My family was harsh Southern. You never ever talked back and you always said thank you and yes sir and yes mam.

    As we learned to write we were taught the lost art of writting a thank you on paper. I find email thank yous unacceptable.

    Great point, thank you for sharing.
    barb10562 responded:
    Photo actually has been a great help to me over the years.She has a positive attitude and some really great advice. I think if it werent for her, I would have given up years ago. Ive kearned to be the boss of myself and have done very well with dealing with diabetes. My last A1C was 6.6 and Ive lost 20 lbs- so thanks Photo for all your input and keep it coming!
    DoOvers responded:
    Perpetual motion is a fact of life not just a concept or theory.
    brunosbud replied to rachael67's response:
    Wow. What a post! Thank you!

    and, Loretta says thank you, too...
    marysings responded:
    At one time we had a pastor's wife who never shut off all the lights at night. There were three to six small lamps in all the main areas of the house. 25watt bulbs offered just the right amount of light as you moved from room to room. It was comforting to not be in the dark.

    I've started with stick-like lights in a tall plant in my living room. Now the main area of my home is never in the dark.
    angelswife responded:
    I've kept a Gratitude Journal since May of 1996. I was homeless at the time I began it; and the things I was grateful for in that first entry were my two blankets, a sunny parking spot (I lived in my car), a bottle of water and a can of Spaghetti-Os. That entry still makes me smile, because it was the beginning of an active practice of seeing the daily joys in my life.

    The best thing I ever learned came after I was dxed with Fibromyalgia in November of 2010. I was scared and overwhelmed, and I felt like my life was over. A very wise friend sat down with me several days later, and she said, "This may be life disrupting but it isn't life threatening." It was an important distinction for me, and it has become my mantra during the challenging times. My life is better because of them.

    WebMD Talk Show

    Feel like a friendly debate? Take the gloves off and defend your viewpoint.

    Learn More

    Expert Blog

    Diagnosis: Reality Check

    Putting perspective on health news and names in the spotlight.Read More