Relationships and Coping Community

Announcements

Attention All WebMD Community Members:

These message boards are closed to posting. Please head on over to our new WebMD Message Boards to check out and participate in the great conversations taking place: https://messageboards.webmd.com/

Attention: The information provided in this forum is intended for educational purposes only, and is not a substitute for individual professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

What's Happening Now

See All Discussions | Tips | Resources

PTSD

I recently came back from a long term Drug Rehab. that took me and my husband. We were both on various...

Posted by kadenjase9

0 Replies | Share this:PTSD I recently came back from a long term Drug Rehab. that took me and my husband. We were both on various...

5 Kinds of Love

Because there are many kinds of love, this can be a misleading question. When you ask...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

0 Replies | Share this:5 Kinds of Love Because there are many kinds of love, this can be a misleading question. When you ask...

Reply: Wife with NO desire at all.. sigh.

You might try a sex therapist, who can talk with you about relationship issues in general,...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

9 Replies | Share this:Wife with NO desire at all.. sigh. You might try a sex therapist, who can talk with you about relationship issues in general,...

Reigniting Your Passion

While committed relationships can offer a sense of security, they can also become less...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

0 Replies | Share this:Reigniting Your Passion While committed relationships can offer a sense of security, they can also become less...

Includes Expert Content

Reply: What is self-love? And how can you nurture it?

Thank you Dr. Becker-Phelps! It is my wish to do just that!

LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!

Posted by dfromspencer

3 Replies | Share this:What is self-love? And how can you nurture it? Thank you Dr. Becker-Phelps! It is my wish to do just that!

the importance of sleep

I posted an article on my Psychology Today blog about the importance of sleep. I did not...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

0 Replies | Share this:the importance of sleep I posted an article on my Psychology Today blog about the importance of sleep. I did not...

Reply: Self bulling revisted whats the. Point? Part2

You have a lot of difficult things going on. It's important to understand that the best your...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

2 Replies | Share this:Self bulling revisted whats the. Point? Part2 You have a lot of difficult things going on. It's important to understand that the best your...

Reply: Self bulling revisted whats the oint?

I understand what you are saying about what's the point of emotions and that you think you...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

2 Replies | Share this:Self bulling revisted whats the oint? I understand what you are saying about what's the point of emotions and that you think you...

What is self-love? And how can you nurture it?

Loving yourself is key in feeling good each and every day of your life. It means that you...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

0 Replies | Share this:What is self-love? And how can you nurture it? Loving yourself is key in feeling good each and every day of your life. It means that you...

Includes Expert Content

Reply: Being a mother and grandmother

Hi, I hope you found what you were looking for with Dr. Leslie? No one should ever be treated like your...

LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!

Posted by dfromspencer

4 Replies | Share this:Being a mother and grandmother Hi, I hope you found what you were looking for with Dr. Leslie? No one should ever be treated like your...

Reply: WHAT? NEW message boards?

Thanks Dennis and Roh (and everyone else here)! We are excited to finally be able to share these...

Posted by atti_editor

4 Replies | Share this:WHAT? NEW message boards? Thanks Dennis and Roh (and everyone else here)! We are excited to finally be able to share these...

Can you really trust your gut?

People often have an immediate gut reaction to meeting someone new. Although they might make...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

0 Replies | Share this:Can you really trust your gut? People often have an immediate gut reaction to meeting someone new. Although they might make...

Includes Expert Content

Reply: How to Save Your Marriage After Infidelity

Hi Dr. Leslie, I wish I could have known you back then, I might still be married if I did? But, as you...

LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!

Posted by dfromspencer

1 Reply | Share this:How to Save Your Marriage After Infidelity Hi Dr. Leslie, I wish I could have known you back then, I might still be married if I did? But, as you...

Includes Expert Content

Reply: Here it is.. How to leave your partner while pregn...

Wow, I really feel bad for your predicament! I used to be that guy myself, but I used any drug I could get...

LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!

Posted by dfromspencer

Wow, I really feel bad for your predicament! I used to be that guy myself, but I used any drug I could get my hands on, and alcohol. For me, it took going to prison to get the help I needed. And, honestly, I couldn't thank them more! That saved my life.

So, I know what you are going through. Please take Dr. Leslie's advice, please! There are so many ways you can get the help you need. Your first bet would be a women's shelter. Then, you should go to D.H.S., and even your city's county relief office. The county relief office can help you with rent, but I think you need to have a place to actually live in? So, first try your local D.H.S. office first, they can steer you in the right direction. You could even go to your church, if you have one, or the local one, anyway? They will sometimes help people with things like a bus ticket to where ever you want to go. Clothes if you need, and even food? You can qualify for emergency food stamps, and the local welfare could start you on their monthly check, to pay for your housing and utilities. There are just so many places out there to help homeless women that are pregnant, you just need to ask, that's all. The women's shelter can get you all that help themselves.

I wouldn't like to see you lose this baby either! So, you now have no excuse, GET MOVING! Get as far away from this guy as you can! As long as he is controlled by the drugs, he will always be a danger to you, and worse, the baby! No more excuses, GET MOVING NOW!

One thing I want you to understand about addiction, it controls you, it consumes your every thought, it leaves you totally dependent on it. You cannot fix him! Only he can fix himself. Please leave as soon as you possibly can, and don't worry about what tomorrow might bring. Just make sure you and your precious cargo are safe and sound. Cool?

I hope this helps you be brave enough to move for the baby's sake? And please come by as often as you like, we will be happy to help you more, or just listen if you like? K?

DennisView Thread

LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!

Posted by dfromspencer

19 Replies | Share this:Here it is.. How to leave your partner while pregnant? Wow, I really feel bad for your predicament! I used to be that guy myself, but I used any drug I could get...

Beware of Those Who Fear Commitment

If you want to be in a committed relationship, you can save yourself a lot of grief by not...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

0 Replies | Share this:Beware of Those Who Fear Commitment If you want to be in a committed relationship, you can save yourself a lot of grief by not...

Reply: Posting

Woohoo! Seems to be working better.

Posted by rohvannyn

2 Replies | Share this:Posting Woohoo! Seems to be working better.

Reply: Nervous about a follow-up appointment - need advic...

I agree with Dennis. Also, sometimes doctors will want to discuss your bloodwork results with you just so you...

Posted by rohvannyn

3 Replies | Share this:Nervous about a follow-up appointment - need advice I agree with Dennis. Also, sometimes doctors will want to discuss your bloodwork results with you just so you...

Signs of a Good Friend

Friends add so much to life. They can offer connection, fun, support, encouragement, and...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

0 Replies | Share this:Signs of a Good Friend Friends add so much to life. They can offer connection, fun, support, encouragement, and...

Includes Expert Content

Reply: Do You Know Why You Are Getting Married?

There were no jitters here. We had lived together for over 12 years when we got married and had already...

Posted by winterglow

1 Reply | Share this:Do You Know Why You Are Getting Married? There were no jitters here. We had lived together for over 12 years when we got married and had already...

Reply: Why can't we post?

Success, success, it finally works! Yea!!! Thanks Roh, for coming here to answer this, it seems to be...

LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!

Posted by dfromspencer

3 Replies | Share this:Why can't we post? Success, success, it finally works! Yea!!! Thanks Roh, for coming here to answer this, it seems to be...

Reply: Pregnant by married man

Yes my thinking was definitely out of anger. But I am well enough to be a single parent but honestly who...

Posted by unreal478

3 Replies | Share this:Pregnant by married man Yes my thinking was definitely out of anger. But I am well enough to be a single parent but honestly who...

Includes Expert Content

Reply: Getting Along with Your In-Laws

Frankly, it wasn't easy. I am from the north of Scotland and was brought up to be fiercely independent and to take...

There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

Posted by fcl

Frankly, it wasn't easy. I am from the north of Scotland and was brought up to be fiercely independent and to take care of myself. His family is Mediterranean French. We came from two different planets where family is important but in entirely different ways.

I felt totally smothered by his mother (she kept wanting to DO things for me...) and she probably felt rejected by me because I kept my distance.

Anyway, she had the keys to our house and would drop in during the day and leave a cake or something on the table for us. I didn't like it but tolerated it for his sake. I was working long hours with endless transport (out at 6 in the morning, home after 9 in the evening) in a highly stressful job. Things came to a head when we got home one Friday evening and found that she had been there. She had done all the ironing, cleaned our bedroom, washed the floors and done the dishes that were sitting waiting in the sink. I sat down on the kitchen floor and wept. I took it like a blow to the heart. I told him that it had to stop and either he could do it his way or I would do it mine...

I don't know what he said but there then followed nearly 6 months of offended silence... We slowly got back in touch, discovered that we had similar interests and started going to exhibitions, castles, shows together

but the boundaries were set and respected and I just wished I had started with that - boundaries. My husband was not at all involved in the process - he stepped back and let us sort it out (an it was the wisest thing to do , in my opinion).

Over the years we developed a really close relationship and you cannot imagine the pain an grief I felt when she died. She was an exceptional woman in every sense possible and I still miss her today ... nearly 10 years later.

With his father it was a bit different. I only really got to know him after my MIL died. Before that he considered me to be a bad influence on her

I encouraged her to live her life for herself, to do what she really wanted to do. This resulted in her taking several holidays with friends and without him (he refused to even leave the house when he wasn't at work) among other things ... He has loosened up quite a lot since he's been on his own.View Thread

There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

Posted by fcl

1 Reply | Share this:Getting Along with Your In-Laws Frankly, it wasn't easy. I am from the north of Scotland and was brought up to be fiercely independent and to take...

Dating an extrovert

Extroverted people are energized by being with others. If you are wired differently, it can...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

0 Replies | Share this:Dating an extrovert Extroverted people are energized by being with others. If you are wired differently, it can...

Reply: Hi folks

Hi, Debbie. You might find it helpful to also read: Stand Up to Self-Bullying . And, to...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

2 Replies | Share this:Hi folks Hi, Debbie. You might find it helpful to also read: Stand Up to Self-Bullying . And, to...

Reply: How Much Privacy is Good for a Relationship?

All good points, Dennis. True, deep intimacy does take time. And respecting each other's...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

2 Replies | Share this:How Much Privacy is Good for a Relationship? All good points, Dennis. True, deep intimacy does take time. And respecting each other's...

Hi folks

Just wanted to drop a. Note. I was just. Watching Dr. Phelps. Video on self. Bullying. I miss you guys

Posted by chips15

0 Replies | Share this:Hi folks Just wanted to drop a. Note. I was just. Watching Dr. Phelps. Video on self. Bullying. I miss you guys

Hi folks

Just wanted to drop a. Note. I was just. Watching Dr. Phelps. Video on self. Bullying. I miss you guys

Posted by chips15

0 Replies | Share this:Hi folks Just wanted to drop a. Note. I was just. Watching Dr. Phelps. Video on self. Bullying. I miss you guys

Reply: Thank you to our heroes

Thanks Roh, So many take for granted their freedoms. I never saw combat, I was ready too at the drop of a...

LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!

Posted by dfromspencer

1 Reply | Share this:Thank you to our heroes Thanks Roh, So many take for granted their freedoms. I never saw combat, I was ready too at the drop of a...

Reply: Coping with Rejection

When you are the one who rejects someone else, there are things you can say to make the...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

4 Replies | Share this:Coping with Rejection When you are the one who rejects someone else, there are things you can say to make the...

Reply: So stressed out by fiance's female friend

When partners struggle with jealousy, it is essential that they try to step back to look at...

Posted by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

2 Replies | Share this:So stressed out by fiance's female friend When partners struggle with jealousy, it is essential that they try to step back to look at...

More: Discussions | Tips | Resources

See Related Sex & Relationships Communities

Couples Coping Support Group

See All Communities

Visit the Sex & Relationships Center

Women's Health Newsletter

Find out what women really need.

Featuring Experts

Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

Dr. Becker-Phelps is a well-respected psychologist, who is dedicated to helping people understand themselves and what they need to do to become emotio...More

Popular Discussions

See All

Helpful Tips

Same thing here

My boyfriend use to hold me as we slept, now it is i have to hold him or he wants to hold hands. The intamcy is not like it use to be and ... More

Was this Helpful?

1 of 3 found this helpful

Post a Tip | See All

Helpful Resources

Help finding a sex therapist

Find a psychologist

National Domestic Violence Hot...

How sharing childcare duties c...

[email protected]

See All

Related Drug Reviews

Drug Name User Reviews

Report Problems With Your Medications to the FDA

You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

The opinions expressed in WebMD Communities are solely those of the User, who may or may not have medical or scientific training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of WebMD. Communities are not reviewed by a WebMD physician or any member of the WebMD editorial staff for accuracy, balance, objectivity, or any other reason except for compliance with our Terms and Conditions. Some of these opinions may contain information about treatments or uses of drug products that have not been approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration. WebMD does not endorse any specific product, service or treatment.

Do not consider Communities as medical advice. Never delay or disregard seeking professional medical advice from your doctor or other qualified healthcare provider because of something you have read on WebMD. You should always speak with your doctor before you start, stop, or change any prescribed part of your care plan or treatment. WebMD understands that reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment from a qualified health care provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or dial 911 immediately.